My friend hat I have been talking about in my questions lately is very depressed lately. He found out that he will be having back surgery in a few months and won't be able to be the actine person that he is for a while. he is pretty depressed about that. his back hurts more than it ever has in the past this week. tonight i am going to his bday party and I want to try to cheer him up a little. when i saw him last night i reminded him that i have had a rough week also and he wasn't alone to try to cheer him, up, but i don't think it worked. Any suggestions as to what i can say or do tonight at the party to try to cheer him up, because when i talked to him on the phone this morning, when I asked him how he was, he said that he was the same as last night, depressed and in pain. PLZ HELP!
it is breaking my heart to see him like this.
2007-12-02 05:36:57 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I know how your friend feels. I'm having back surgery in a couple days (finally), and the wait is miserable. Pain and the immobiliztion that comes with it can definitely cause depression. It's a very difficult, frustrating situation, especially if you are used to being active. You begin to feel bored and even useless, almost like a burden to anyone who has to help you or listen to you complain. What you can do to help him is to listen. Remind him that you care, and you want to help. He is going to go through this period of depression, but be there to listen. Remind him that it will all change soon enough, and until then, he can count on you to be there. Encourage him to do things to occupy his mind since he can't be active. Suggest movies to watch and interesting things to read. On the days when he feels better, encourage him to get outside, even for a car ride or a short walk. Tell him to talk to other people too, especially anyone who has experienced anything like what he's going through. That helped me. Just be there, and be encouraging. There's nothing you can do to make him perfectly happy, but you can help him deal with the wait. People like us usually think we are pain, and he's lucky he's got a good friend who cares.
2007-12-02 05:51:36 · answer #1 · answered by Elsie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That would be pretty scary.
Hey, just be his friend. You guys can talk about the things you can do once he's all healed up. Let him do as much as he can for himself: He probably feels awful that he is limited as it is, and will want to prove that he can still handle some things on his own. Perhaps you can talk about some DVDs you can get and watch together later and things like that.
Good luck, and I'll be cheering your friend on!
2007-12-02 05:43:47 · answer #2 · answered by Tigger 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he cant help it that hes getting back surgery and is depressed, i mean who wouldnt be. anyways, as corny as this may sound, find some really good jokes online, play chess and let him win(always cheers up my cuzin) talk with him about the past, etc.
2007-12-02 05:42:15 · answer #3 · answered by Bob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg thats so sad! awww! i think you just be yourself and try not to mention his back, or surgery. just have a really great time and have fun! if he see's you having fun it might make him feel better. and if someone brings up that subject you should change it somehow, but be suttle. good luck, hope he makes it through the surgery all right!!!
2007-12-02 05:44:16 · answer #4 · answered by Annie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
show him a good time take him fishing or to an amusment park
2007-12-02 05:41:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell him that no matter what, you're there for him. be a good friend, tell him about what you guys are gonna do as soon as he's better.
2007-12-02 05:41:11 · answer #6 · answered by La Leona 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do something wicked funny like randomly tapp dance or something. lol idk. i hope hes ok after the surgery!
2007-12-02 05:40:50 · answer #7 · answered by ilovjb144 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋