Should I tell her?!?!?

Question

My sister just got married. So she invited me to her house for a sleepover (we are close). Her husband was there. Well my sister had to run out to get some stuff and it was gonna take about an hour. So I was like "I'll stay". I hate when she goes shopping. It's takes forever. Well, about 30 minutes later I opened the door to the outside to take out the trash and her husband was making out with some girl. He told me that she came onto him and he made her leave right away. He begged me not to tell my sister because it was a mistake. Should I tell her or just let it fly this ONE time? I mean, it might have truely been a mistake, right? But what if it was true!?!? He is a really trustworthy guy and I don't want to be a tattle-tale. I didn't tell her, but should I call and warn her? HELP!!!!!!

Answer 1

I dont care what lame excuse you got from him! that isyour sister! she has every right to know and you shouldnt have even hesitated to tell her... if you flip the situation and pretend that your sister caught your husband making out with another woman and didnt tell you b/c he said it wasnt what it seemed....if you found out eventually would you not feel betrayed by her! sisiters are supposed to be there for eachother,,,and even if this was a mistak..... which i dont see how a make out session is a mistake even if the chick came onto him he could have pushed her away right away when her lips touched his.....you should tell her and let her decide whether she thinks it was a viable excuse! Please think about this and keep her feelings in mind! Be a good sister

Answer 2

You should tell your sister and let her decide if it was a mistake or not.That isn't your call that is hers.What if you were in her shoes?Would you want her to tell you if your husband kissed another girl?That is your sister.Do you want to see her get hurt?She will find out sooner or later and when she does and finds out you knew and didn't tell her she will more than likely be upset with you.The best thing to do is to tell your sister what you say and tell her what her husband said to you.If he is so trustworthy why did he kiss another woman at your sister's home??Plus why wouldn't he tell her if he is so trustworthy?It would be alot better if you told your sister now instead of her finding out later.It could have been a one time thing but your sister still has a right to know so she can make up her own mind about it.Good luck.

Answer 3

If it was the other way round would you want to know or not? You know your brother in law more than anyone on here so do you think deep down he is capable of making this a habit?. You are in a bad position here and if she does ever catch him and finds out you knew then it could ruin any relationship you have with her. I would tell her it is better coming from you than a complete stranger. They may decide to work through this and thank you in the end. If they do seperate surely it is better that she has not wasted years of her life and kids involved.

Answer 4

If that is your defination of trustworthy, I think you should check the dictionary, honey.

Let me tell you why you should tell her, she is your sister, and the only one you will ever have, your sister can have her choice of many husbands, but sisters are here to stay and like you mentioned, you have a special bond with her, and the more you do not tell her, the more it will be eating up inside of you.

My mom and I are close, and she has been dating this "wonderful" guy, that she was so happy with, well, one day, when my mom was getting ready for a dinner party at her house, and her boyfriend came over, and without my mom looking, he gave me a hug, and had his hand on my back and slowly brought it down to my left cheek!!!!

I am a married woman of fifteen years, and I was stunned!!!!!

I was beside myself, all day I was miserable, and when I talked to her, she knew something was wrong, I could not tell her because of the house guests coming in.

That night, I told my husband, and then I made the decision to tell my mom, it hurt, I did not want to, but I did not want her marrying a man who is obviously not true to my mom.

I was afraid to tell my mom, but she was glad I told her, It hurt her, and we did not talk about it for a week, I saw my mom, but it was casual talking, then she broke up with him, and she told me on her own time.

My mom is my only mom I will ever have, we are close, we have a bond, there will be many other "John's" out there for my mom, but not this one.

Tell your sister, protect your sister, she has every right to know.

The more you keep it inside, the more it will bother you, and she will know that something is on your mind even if you pretend that everything is fine, and when you look at her husband, and keep a distance from him while she is there, then your sister will know that something is definately wrong.

He will look at you funny, and you will look at him funny, and then when she finally finds out the truth, she will be so mad that you did not tell her sooner!

Answer 5

Wow..despite what your brother in law said, what was your initial impression? Do you believe him? You stated here he was making out with the girl, so you obviously didnt walk in on him pushing the girl off of him or telling her to stop. Do you know the woman? And if you do- Is she the type of woman that would just throw herself at a married man? The fact is you said you and your sister are close. Would you want your sister to tell you if the situation was reversed? It is also going to be difficult to maintain the same relationship you had before with your brother in law now that you know his secret, what will you say if your sister questions what happened? If you dont want to come right out and say it, send your sister a type written anonymous letter. This way you can clear your conscience and your sister a way of knowing and then she can deal with it how she sees fit. If your brother in law ever tried to accuse you, you could deny it

Answer 6

What do you think this guy would say when his new sister-in-law catches him cheating? Would he just stare at you and smile like everything's okay? No. He would make an excuse to cover his butt. Even if it was a mistake your sister deserves to know. Wouldn't you want to know if you were in her shoes? At least they can work it out now before it becomes a full blown affair.

Answer 7

LMAO! He's trustworthy? ummm he was kissing someone other then his wife, thats not trustworthy...lol A mistake? Umm sweatherat my banana just sort of fell into her...lol, wow you need to rethink what you think is a mistake and what makes a guy "trustworthy". And yes you should tell your sister, she's your SISTER!

Answer 8

You need to tell her sweetie. Your loyalties should be to HER, not him....she's your sister afterall. Even though she may not believe you and she may get defensive,you need to take that chance. If she decides to stay, then at least she'll do so knowing the full truth of what her husband is ....a lying, cheating scumbag. No, he's not telling the truth. I doubt that it was the first or last time. This girl didn't just conveniently show up right at that moment. He's probably been having sex with her the whole time he and your sister have dated!

Answer 9

She was the one that come on to him? Yeah right! That's what they all say. I'd tell your sister because she does deserve to know. If she does decide to forgive him or not is only her business, but I do think she should know. Plus, what if she found out later on (they usually always do)? She could get really upset at you for not telling her anything. I know I would.

Answer 10

I love my hubby,but my sister is forever.If it were my sister,I would bring up the other girl right in front of him.I wouldn't tell what I witnessed.Just casually bring her up as if to ask your sister who she is.You know,like "while I was staying over the other night,this girl [describe her] was outside the house and is she a neighbor of yours?"
Could break the ice for hubby to confess.At least it would let him know you aren't letting it go.