My ex-spouse and I were married for 13 years. We are now divorced. He was verbally, physically and emotionally abusive to me and my two sons. He does not pay child support or hardly ever contact his children. We still run in the same social circle. How do I attend parties and other events that he is at without a confrontation. I honestly don't know how to deal with him or his new girlfriend. They both try to pick fights with me and I try to ignore them, but it is hard.
2007-12-01 18:14:29 · 12 answers · asked by luvmybenz2 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Show them who's the bigger person, don't let hate and anger control you for it only hurts you. Show them what it's like to be happy and content.
2007-12-01 18:20:49 · answer #1 · answered by lenzix5 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is very hard. Once upon a time I was like that with my ex and his girlfriend, then wife, and now ex wife... It is very difficult when you keep the "same circle of friends". Eventually one of you will have to branch out and find other friends. Those confrontations will eventually vanish, but it does take time. The best advice I could ever give is to not give in to them, and when they try to make you mad or make bad remarks to or about you around this "circle of friends"; all you can do is to try to ignore him and his girlfriends. Pretty soon everyone will get tired of hearing all the arguments that they start and possibly stop inviting them to the gatherings. Most importantly do not get the children involved in these arguments. From experience the kids are the ones that suffer the most. These arguments that they see or hear will leave emotional scars.
2007-12-01 18:46:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This can be difficult, but you are going to have to be the better person. If he and his girlfriend are always tryng to pick fights with you, just smile sweetly and move on. Sooner or later your friends will figure out your ex and his squeeze are no asset to the party. You might even sit one or two of them out if you know he will be there.
I can't think of anything less fun than spending an evening being around my ex. Parties are supposed to be fun.
2007-12-01 18:40:35 · answer #3 · answered by drewxjacobs 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sure you don't want to hear this but you need to find a new circle of friends. It makes it too hard to move on if you still see each other around. I pray that you kids will grow up and be fine without the loser in their life. Good luck
2007-12-01 18:24:31 · answer #4 · answered by mickey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try and find out who the other guests are at these social gatherings and avoid them, or if it's something that you want to attend, find a male friend to go with you that could keep them away from you.
2007-12-01 19:53:15 · answer #5 · answered by Alwyn C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell the host of the party, and make sure they know that if he attends you wont, out of respect for her house. Make the point that you dont want a scene at their party to ruin the evening. Chances are, the host will stop inviting them.
2007-12-01 18:42:28 · answer #6 · answered by boots6 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, ask the host who's invited and make it clear you don't want to be in the same room with your ex. If it can't be avoided, bring someone who looks better than he does. You should avoid them during parties you can't get out of.
2007-12-01 18:19:45 · answer #7 · answered by Equinox 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks like you need to find new friends. If you can't do that, then stop complaining. It is YOU who is chosing to be around the creep----you should figure out why you get off on that.
2007-12-02 00:37:54 · answer #8 · answered by Sondra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When there rude,be kind,when there rudder,be kinder.They hate that,it dis-arms them.They look like the jerks and your the decent person.
2007-12-01 18:23:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
find better peeps to hang with sounds like a bad crowd anyway
2007-12-01 19:01:51 · answer #10 · answered by lalisalaloca 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋