I got married when I was only 17, Then I filed a divorced at 19. My divorce took almost two years and it was just final three days ago. I have dated around and have not found any femal that I care for as much as I did my ex-wife untill I met the girl I am with now. I want to get married to her and have a child with her though I have a wonderful son three year old son with my ex-wife. I love my girlfriend but we are young. I am about to be 22 and she is about to be 19. She has never been in a seriouse relationship before me. This girl is my everything other than my son who is my number one. We have only been together for about a half of a year but I feel so conected to her. She has a good head on her sholders and is a hard worker. I tend to attract psycho femals but this one is nothing like my past girlfriends and ex-wife. She is wonderful, beautiful and her and my son love eachother very much. So, do I ask her to marry me and set a date giving more time, try to marry now, or just wait?
2007-12-01 17:21:46 · 18 answers · asked by justin1jd 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You seem to love her very much...Let me ask you a question. If you lost her would you regret not asking her to marry you? You sound more scared than nervous, but if you dont try then you dont really know if it will work or not. Give it a shot, theres a 50/50 shot that it could last forever, and your little boy is still young and it really wouldn't be a good thing for you to date a lot of women and put him through all that..thats not fair to him.
2007-12-01 17:26:54 · answer #1 · answered by cutiepie88 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I;m happy for you that you have a good relationship with this new girl thus far. but 6 mths is still a bit to soon. Keep dating her of course and you will learn more and become closer im sure. but you still need time and she is only 19 your ideas will change your both very young. there is no rush if you both care for the other the other stuff is only a piece of paper give it more time
and if you feel the same way down the road and you can't be without her nor want her with anyone else and your both on the same page then take the leap. Or if your okay with just living together try that.
TOday to many marriages end in divorce and you could both save your self heartache and trouble.
2007-12-01 17:29:20 · answer #2 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you saw what happened when you rushed in to the first marriage so wait. Secondly this girl is young and hasn't even figured out what she wants out of life like College or University.
Do not take that opportunity away from her or she will regret it later in life. At this time help raise your son and just get to know this girl while she finishes her education and if you haven't maybe it's time to get a career.
You are unstable and confused at this moment trust me you can survive without a wife for awhile just be happy you found someone to keep you company in life for the time being.
If this is going to work it is best to see how the feelings are in say minimum 3yrs. Take this time to reflect on your life and stuff you need to fix to make your life well better. You say you have a child from you first marriage I think that is plenty of responsibility for the time being.
Forget about the whole marriage thing if it is destined to happen it will.
God Bless and Best Wishes If you read any of this I will capitalize this last part: DO NOT GET MARRIED ANYTIME SOON SHE IS 19 LET HER FINISH HER EDUCATION!. IF FOR SOME REASON IT DOESN'T WORK BETWEEN YOU TWO WOULDN'T IT BE NICE TO HAVE A HAND IN HER HAVING A CAREER TO FALL BACK ON. JUST THINK SHE GET'S A CAREER JUST MORE MONEY TO SPOIL YOU WITH.
2007-12-01 17:39:29 · answer #3 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say go for it, but first: God say's build your house upon the rock and the winds, water, etc. can't knock it down. I say go to a church and go to couple couseling. This is really good and will be a better guestimate for your proposal. Maybe tell her that your thinking of marriage or that you're just interested in taking your relationship with her to a new level and would like to explore counseling. Your child will appreciate the fact that you went to such trouble to get the best step-mother and your girlfriend 'if she is all that you think' will feel the same and will think highly of you. This will also give you some time to really get to knwo each others beliefs, values, etc. Also pray. God listens. He will answer and guide you. He is the Rock. You sound like a great guy. I hope she is all that you believe and I hope that you are all she needs. God Bless.
2007-12-01 18:53:05 · answer #4 · answered by bobthebuilder 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've been through one marriage, child and divorce and you're 22. I'm all for marriage, even re-marriage, but you really need to give this time. like a couple of years! Stay with her, protect yourselves (no more children yet) and work on your life with her and with your son. If you want to be married again, be sure you want to be married for the next 50 years. Be ready financially, and spiritually. If she's the right one, you can both be strong and wait a bit.
2007-12-01 17:29:32 · answer #5 · answered by Jennifer M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh sounds like your in love...congrats.But wait a bit...I not saying not to get married...just give it a lil time.I got married really young to ,i was 19 and it lasted six years....We all go though changes as we get older.Tell her your feelings and see how she feels about it.I am 29 now and married for the second time...its wonderful.There is noting wrong with having a long engagement......Then have a blow out wedding in a few years
2007-12-01 17:31:17 · answer #6 · answered by TERRI S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What ever you do, go over some of those important things about being together before you say i do. Like religious beliefs, what finances are going to look like, who is going to be head of household, what is the going out deal going to be like, what are each others goals, what are each others needs and are each of you capable of meeting the important needs of each other...stuff like this. Of course, your first marriage ended for a reason, learn from it and clear that stuff to be one step ahead of the game this time. You were young then and you are young now. And she is too. Time is precious and so is she if she aint going anywhere soon so take your time. You do not sound ready. Keep getting to know each other. Your a good man (it sounds like). So you deserve the best so wait and see if she is the best.
2007-12-01 17:29:16 · answer #7 · answered by beachgirl90 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your in love, and that's awesome! Some people can search the world and never find what you have. Go for it! Ask her and if she says yes make sure you guys have a long engagement, and live together first. Hope fully her parents will support her and not make it hard for her ( seeing she is so young ) if you talk to them and tell them how deeply you love her maybe it will make it easier for them to agree and give their blessings. Good luck. Hey you found her make sure you treat her like gold and everything will work out.
2007-12-01 17:32:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what's the rush? see if this can even stand the test of time first. you have a life of being a parent ahead of you. she has a life of hopefully going to school, starting a career, dating around, experiencing life. she's not even of legal age to drink. and believe me, you marry her now, add on all the stresses of marriage, stepkid, etc, she will probably be off partying with her girlfriends while you sit at home contemplating getting a divorce again.
2007-12-01 17:30:17 · answer #9 · answered by celticbuddha 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what - DON'T GET MARRIED. Marriage or the idea of it ruins a lot of potentially good relationships. If you're both really ready, then go. But if one isn't as sure, don't.
2007-12-01 17:25:26 · answer #10 · answered by Equinox 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋