Is hiding the same as lying?

Question

For example,
You get a ticket, you don't want your spouse to know so that you don't worry them. So you pay it in secret and never tell them. Another example is you get a low score on your test, you don't tell your parents about it fearing the consequences but you solve it on your own. So is hiding these things from these people the same as lying?

Answer 1

It's fundamentally lying. Sure, it's not that bad, but in the grand scheme of things, being honest would be better.

Think of it this way. Every person wants to be perfect in the eyes of others. But the people we truly respect are the ones that accept themselves for who they are and always tell the truth, even if it shows weakness.

Showing weaknesses is really showing courage and strength. One gains a lot more respect from that than lying about a ticket or saying you did a decent job on a test when you didn't.

I mean, think of each of these scenarios from your perspective. As a parent, if my child came straight home and told me "Mom, I'm worried you'll be upset, but I have to tell you something. I did a really crappy job on my exam and I'm disappointed in myself. I want to do better in the future." I would be really pleased with their honesty and devotion to correcting their mistakes.

Or if my husband came home and said "Baby, I'm really really sorry, but I got a ticket today. You have every right to be upset w/ me, I was irresponsible" I'm not very likely to want to make him feel any worse. And it would also reinforce my feelings of trust in him.

Answer 2

It can be considered "lying by omission." But as in everything -- there are different levels to it. If I go on a shopping spree and I buy more shoes than my husband needs, so I sneak the packages in after he is asleep -- then this is harmless. However if I did the same thing but we are having financial problems -- then I call it lying by omission. Circumstances matter. The term "white lie" is meant to mean that you told an itty bitty lie about something you think is insignificant. But perhaps the person you are lying to doesn't thinks it is something significant. Everyone lies on some level at some point in their lives. And if they say they don't -- they're lying. I think that if you find yourslef lying by omission often -- you may want to evaluate WHY you do this. Some people are afraid of consequences, others because they want to ignore the truth. If you get a speeding ticket, it's probably not a big deal. But think about why you don't want to tell husband -- because if it wasn't such a big deal -- there would be no reason NOT to tell him, right. Personally, and from experience, I just think it's best to tell the truth, because if it comes out later, someone may question your "omission" and lose trust in you. But if you keep certain things to yourself to truly protect someone else pain -- your choice may be justified. I always like to do a quick mental role-reversal -- If the situation was reversed, would I be upset if he/she didn't tell me that? To wrap this up -- no, I wouldn't actually call it lying if you omit something now and then. But if it's a habit -- then yes -- it can be construed as lying.

Answer 3

Some believe that a sin of omission is still a sin. We probably all avoid telling others the whole truth all the time, if for no other reason than to spare their feelings....."No, honey that dress doesn't make you look fat"....that sort of thing. You have to weigh the situation and decide how you would feel in the same position. For example, if your wife got a ticket and didn't tell you, would you think it was not to worry you, or because she felt you might get angry and start a fight....
Do unto others is a good policy.

Answer 4

I equate it w/ lying.
I think if you do something wrong you should mention it to the ones that matter.
For example about the ticket one should mention it to a spouse but you wouldn't need to tell your parents lol.
As for the test score if you are in jr high or high school yes you should tell your parents...but not maybe your best friend.

Intentionally 'hiding' facts/ truth is deceitful & can ruin relationships...how can someone trust you if they don't know what you might leave out of the next story?

Answer 5

Unless you say something untrue you are not lying. However hiding is an equally destructive beahvior in a couple relationship. As to your parents, nothing wrong with trying to handle things yourself if you are an adult.

Answer 6

If you are an adult you don't have to lie are hide things from anyone-about the problem with telling your parents-if you solved the problem yourself tell them that and they will be very proud of you (i know that i would be proud) it shows them that you are growing up and learning the right things and they are doing their best to teach you right from wrong

Answer 7

No it's not, but the difference isn't much. Looking into someones eyes and outright lying is worse than not mentioning the facts.

Answer 8

Ever heard of "lying by ommission" ? This is the things which you don't tell.

There are some things which you are supposed to tell significant people in your life.

There are other things which it does not matter if they are not ever told.

Answer 9

I don't think so. It's not like we can know every single thing that every one else does all the time and neither should we have to relay every single thing that we do to our loved ones.. especially if it's just normal, every day type of things.

Answer 10

Hiding is a strategy to cover your reality;you are lying to yourself.It's a way not to tell the truth and to give explanations to others.