My husband was a virgin when we met, so I am really confused why he insist using condoms in our marriage. Honestly every time we use a condom I feel like a dirty Hs girl trying not to get caught.
I have always associate condoms as "dirty". My husband says he doesn't trust birth control and eventually we do want children.
We can NEVER do it in the spur of the moment because he needs his condoms. I also feel very dirty when we go buy them while grocery shopping. We both have never been with anyone except each other. Any suggestions on how I should deal with this matter.?
2007-12-01 05:18:55 · 18 answers · asked by Bride2Be 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am 1000% sure he was a virgin. The first time we did it he lasted 30 sec. He never felt that before. He was also a horrible kisser. So I know he was a virgin.
2007-12-01 05:31:34 · update #1
dear heart,
he is right, some forms of birth control are very unreliable. i was on the depo shot and became pregnant!
It is always better to be safe than sorry.
Also, my friend Sarah, she was on the pill and felt terrible. Come to find out she was 5 months pregnant and STILL taking her Birth Control pill!
Ask your Dr, and get it in writing if he thinks it is safe for the 2 of you to make love without a condom..according to what Birth Control you are using!
Blessings and luck
2007-12-01 05:28:13 · answer #1 · answered by Midnight Winter WOLF 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Does he care if you get pregnant because that's probably a very good reason to use condoms unless you're using another birth control method or you two want to start a family. Have you tried asking HIM why he insists on using condoms? Are you offering him an alternative method of birth control, such as the pill or an IUD? He may be concerned about getting you pregnant and would rather wear a rubber than have to worry about the consequences which is pretty responsible on his part.
2007-12-01 05:52:47 · answer #2 · answered by Vivita 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Using a condom is not dirty or only for high school kids. He does not want to have any children yet. That makes him smart to prevent them before the two of you are ready. There is nothing wrong with buying condoms. Why do you feel dirty? Having sex with your husband and preventing unwanted pregnancy is not at all dirty. If you can not have spur of the moment sex because you do not have any, make sure that you never run out. Get them before you need them.
2007-12-01 05:26:30 · answer #3 · answered by kim h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Respect his need for condoms as a safety measure against children for right now. He's right--you can't trust just one method of birth control. Does he use a condom also when you blow him? Because if he lets you do this without the condom, then you'll know that it's not that he thinks you're dirty, right?
2007-12-01 05:27:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes I do have some suggestions. You need to sit down and talk to your husband and be like look. I am your wife and if I knew you was going to use condoms on me I would have wore one when we got married to you. But I didn't. So, therefore we shouldn't use them when we making love. There is a birth control that works it is called UTI and it last for 5 yrs. So if you aren't trying to have kids you can go to your GYN and get it down in one office visit no surgeries or anything.
2007-12-01 05:34:06 · answer #5 · answered by letitia.calloway 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Condoms are far safer than birth control pills hon.Also it is just used by your husband to keep from having kids you arent ready for yet.Let HIM buy the condoms alone at the store.You arent dirty for using them and he doesnt think your dirty, he doesnt want you to risk your health by using birth control pills.
2007-12-01 05:32:01 · answer #6 · answered by Joe F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the fact that he doesn't "trust birth control" is bull. You are his wife and if you both are committed solely to each other there is no need for condoms. He has something to hide and/or definitely doesn't want kids now!
2007-12-01 05:28:05 · answer #7 · answered by I know a lil' bit about that 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got to learn to see the difference in adults being responsible and taking family planning precautions, and kids doing something they may not be ready for. The pill is not 100% for that matter nothing other than abstinence is 100%. It's time for you to grow up and see things like they are.
2007-12-01 05:34:40 · answer #8 · answered by Nasra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i must say that this question surprised me...i admire your husband!!!he is adamant that he doesnt want children and isnt taking any chances...believe me if he doesnt want children right now, a surprise visit from the stork would b the last thing you want...trust me i know...also, dont feel dirty or cheap..i say you are being a responsible adult for buying condoms...good for you and hold your head up...so many people bring children into the world not realizing what it takes being a parent....
2007-12-01 05:43:13 · answer #9 · answered by debbied81 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure he was a virgin and not just saying that? That is really odd to me. You would think he would trust birth control more than condoms, since condoms break, holes in them, etc....
2007-12-01 05:23:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋