My hubby made out and kissed another married woman that we are both friends with apparently. I found out about their session from a common source a few months ago. Anyway I have not told my hubby that I know about them. I found out that all they did was kiss and make out on the sofa one time, and they called it quits...but it seems like my hubby told her that he really likes her, finds her attractive, but cannot do anything anymore or see her. She agreed. But few weeks ago, when my hub and I went to her place for this garlic fest, i casually wanted to see what my hubby would do if i asked him to do thing infront of that other woman Sarah and her hub Jeff. Anyway, we were watching tv this one evening and I told Jeff that I was ready to have ice cream. My hub and Sarah said they didn't want any. i asked my hub, he said he didn't want it. then i asked him to come sit next to me and Sarah..he looked down, smirked and said no...because Sarah was sitting next to me. Anyway, i was
2007-12-01 02:05:07 · 22 answers · asked by toralm1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
happy he said no to sitting in between us, but then i noticed he sat across from sarah, and he kept noticing her, glancing at her..both were smiling, talking softly about the commercials on tv. and then my hub was kind of laughing at me for eating the ice cream and he kept looking at sarah. Wasn't my hubby a jerk for not sitting with me or sarah, but actually preferring to sit across from her and smile at her and talk to her? does that still tell me that he is very fond of Sarah?
2007-12-01 02:07:07 · update #1
dump him
2007-12-01 02:35:26 · answer #1 · answered by Perfectionist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why doesn't anyone ever take a different approach to these situations???
Sure OK I will agree your hubby is a jerk for not sitting with you and Sarah. But since you asked I think your hubby would have been even a bigger jerk IF he had tried to pretend that he does not like Sarah. Obviously he still has feelings for her.
Sakes he agreed not to see her anymore and that is not good enough for you?
If you are hurt and confused you have every right to be but you must accept some of the blame yourself as you agreed to go where you knew this woman would be present.
Why not confront both of them and ask where they want you to fit in? Or tell them what you will and will not tolerate. If you want your hubby chained to you and no one else ever... Then you need to make that clear instead of playing these confusing games with him.
I'm not picking on any of you... I actually think it's cool that you all did get together and behave in a civil and polite manor towards each other. That alone says allot about you.
Don't loose site of the fact that YOU have a significant role in this. There is more than just one possible result. There is so much more to life than just kicking people to the curb when they have hurt you. Only you can decide what will make you happy and content.
I have not forgot about your other question. YES this tells you he is still fond of Sarah but more importantly I think he is still very fond of you.
2007-12-01 10:45:15 · answer #2 · answered by ezxqz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um wow this is DRAMA! Yes I think your husband was wrong but it seems you are threatened by this Sarah woman, if your husband respects your views, he will be willing to respect you and not flirt with other women right in front of you. That is so uncool and totally unacceptable in a marriage! Hopefully, you and your husband can talk things through because it is obvious he wants attention and gets it apparently. You are left in the backseat when you are supposed to be up front. For him to try and be neutral by sitting across from both you and the other woman is like so elementary. You are both adults, confront him and let him know that it hurts you that he is talking with this woman and befriended her after the fact you have found that they made out or whatever...and another thing why are you going to events with your husband at events she hosts. IF anything, cut ties from this woman all together to save your marriage!
2007-12-01 10:21:13 · answer #3 · answered by ♥CJ♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest sitting down and having a serious discussion with him. Let him know that you know what happened and you don't appreciate the way he is acting.
Remember he is the one who made the commitment to you not her.
Let him know that you are not going to put up with this type of behavior from your husband and if he does not love you enough to be true to you then he needs to hit the road.
No one wants to waste time with someone who doesn't love them 100%.
You are the leader of your existence.
If you don't do anything your going to be miserable.
If he wants to start turning it back around on you when you are being calm, end it. (sometimes men do this because they don't want to admit to what they have done and take responsibility for it)
2007-12-01 10:48:41 · answer #4 · answered by patience 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you holding this secret?
You should tell him (and her) that you know what's going on.
The thing that is wrong with the picture here is that you are playing games. You are trying to entrap him into doing more dirt so you can hold this against him too. We already know he is hiding this from you, so expose the both of them.
Drop that bytch as a friend and put your husband in the doghouse.
2007-12-01 10:26:41 · answer #5 · answered by Talkstress 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you ******* crazy, you still went to this bitches house like nothing?? Smiling up in her face when shes behind ya back, probably ******* your man. what is wrong with you? thats yours, ALL YOURS, that is your property. she was all over ya man grabbing rubbing while he was all up on her touchin her while they was making out on the sofa, get the **** outta her i would have ****** that ***** the **** up a loooong *** time ago and over again. and for your man, ah ha what a loser, **** his best friend and divorce him and take half. Did your vows mean anything at all? what was the point of the whole wedding, for show? i just dont know how you could be ok with the fact knowing that your HUSBAND wants another woman and has had another women, yous two committed yourself to one another and it seems like this whole thing is a big high school boyfriend girlfriend situation. **** THAT ***** THE FUUUCK UP AND BEAT THE ****** **** OUT OF YOUR HUSBAND BEFORE YOU SERVE HIM WITH DIVORCE PAPERS !!!
2007-12-01 10:26:18 · answer #6 · answered by Angela 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to let your jerk know what he did. You need to confront him and get it off of your chest. You also need to tell the other woman you know and quit seeing that other couple. You are rubbing salt in that wound. You shouldn't keep hurting yourself because of their bad behavior. Trust is something that is hard to rebuild and if he doesn't know that your trust has been breached the relationship will suffer and so will you both! Hang in there and get out in the open so you can get past this Good luck to you. You deserve better!
2007-12-01 10:13:10 · answer #7 · answered by Janet H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe I'm a little blunt, but I would have gone to that little party at her house in front of everyone and said,
"So, how was your make-out session the other day?"
And then I'd watch their expressions for the satisfaction of seeing them feel caught.
And then I'd walk out (having already prepared his removal from the house and divorce papers).
HEY that's just me, based on the behavior of your husband and seeing how he doesn't care.
2007-12-01 10:27:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You seem to be a push over. Why wouldn't you confront your husband about this? Instead of trying to test him. He's not stupid, of course he's not gonna do anything with the other woman in front of you.
He is a jerk, but I don't think that matters to you because from the essay you wrote, you probably won't do anything anyways.
2007-12-01 10:21:43 · answer #9 · answered by Mr. Q 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its O.K. for him to have a fondness of her so long as they keep it restricted to that. I use to be my sisters husbands' best buddy. He took me out more than he did her. I know this was wrong of him and wrong of me to partake in this BUT, we never ever had any "Relations" and she was confident in that. A man and woman of different marraiges can have intimate "Friendships" so long as it is kept in bounds. Have you never (Since you've been married) felt an attraction to anouther man? Keep a close eye either until he fails or you gain confidence in the situation. Either way, to dwell on it will only serve to wreck YOUR soul.
2007-12-01 10:22:04 · answer #10 · answered by Dr. K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband defentliy likes her and you need to do something about it. If you really love the guy confront him about it. The bible says that adultery is a sin seveth commandment. Anyways good luck. But remeber God also says to forgive one another have a talk with him.
2007-12-01 10:13:17 · answer #11 · answered by Dance Freak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋