please describe to me an emotional relationship. What if you find calls and secrets and money being sent. Could this be "I was just trying to help her out" situation or is there more. Someone please help me see where a line is drawn between and emotional affair and an affair. Is it possible to keep secrets from your wife of 10 years and 2 children. Is it being just friends to sit in a vehicle at night after work and discuss non personal things. Supposedely to listen to her cry about her problems. Whatever. Someone please help me underdstand if I'm over reacting. Supposedly he never touched her sexually only to hug he bye when she left for another job.
2007-11-30 15:23:24 · 11 answers · asked by bob 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
from google, because it worded it better than me: "An emotional affair is when a person not only invests more of their emotional energy outside their marriage, but also receives emotional support and companionship from the new relationship.
In an emotional affair, a person feels closer to the other party and may experience increasing sexual tension.
If you believe that a person's emotional energy is limited, then if your spouse is sharing intimate thoughts and feelings with someone else, an emotional affair has developed.
Although cheaters are often guilt-free in an emotional affair because there is no sex involved, their spouses often view an emotional affair as damaging as a sexual affair."
if you suspect he's doing this, you need to say something to him.
2007-11-30 15:28:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most wives have blinders on when it comes to their husbands because we "trust" them till something is not right - like gut feelings, found secrets, less communication with you, emails, phone calls, "she" needed to talk, less physical attention to you, he comes home with little gifts that you know he would not buy for himself, longer meetings (because she is there), the list can go on and on.
Right now you are emotionally hurting because you know something is not right. We all understand what a sexual affair or physical affair is. But emotional affairs are much more hurtfull and harder to prove and harder to forgive. Still, an affair is an affair no matter the definition and there is no fine line. Cheating is cheating. And yes it is possible to keep secrets from the other because it is a planned secret.
Please look at this web site that I typed in below. It describes emotional affairs perfectly. It gives better descriptions and clarity of the emotions your husband is putting you through.
You are not alone in this my friend. I've been married 16 years and found that I too had been wearing blinders.
2007-11-30 18:30:56 · answer #2 · answered by Jesse 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An emotional affair, is infidelity. No husband should have a relationship with another woman, like the one you describe. You have every right to be angry and jealous. Yes, it's possible to keep secrets from anyone. There is only a need for that kind of secrets, when someone is doing something wrong.
He has no business spending money on another woman, nor sitting in a car alone with her. Don't put up with it.
2007-11-30 15:54:25 · answer #3 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not overreacting. In fact to a degree I feel that an emotional connection is WORSE than a sexual one because when it's emotional FEELINGS are involved. You said it yourself. He's listening to her bs. Sending her money??? WTF? If my husband did this I'd give him five across the eyes and throw him out of my house. You don't need to put up with this, you don't deserve it! Demand answers. If you can find her number call her and ask her to NOT call your husband and sit your husband down and explain to him what an inconsiderate a.s.s.hole he is. Ask him how would he like it if you had a male friend of that caliber? Would he like it if you kept secret phone calls and sent him money? Being the shoulder to cry on. Forget that crap! Again...YOU ARE NOT OVERREACTING. If anything you're UNDER reacting. You only know what he's telling you. For all we know, he could be having an affair and your husband is taking advantage of your trust for him.
2007-11-30 15:34:19 · answer #4 · answered by grneyedgrly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friends can sit in parked cars and talk. Especially if they have nowhere else to go talk. It is a little odd one being male, the other female, in close quarters alone, but...if it's platonic! What kind of nonpersonal things are we saying they talk about?
If there are secrets, it means he's afraid you aren't going to like what he's doing and will put a stop to it. Could be he's doing wrong, or could be he wants to do what he feels is right...and thinks you won't be nice to him about it.... Sounds like you two need to have a nonconfrontational discussion...
Someone before me said you don't give money to someone you don't love. Not true. You could be a very helpful or easily fooled person. In any case, make the time you spend with him time that he will like and not feel bad spending it and maybe he will not find as much solace or comfort in this friendship....
2007-11-30 15:29:14 · answer #5 · answered by dumbuglyweirdo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest w/ u I believe an emotional affair to be worse then a physical affair. Ask me this 4 weeks ago and my answer woulda been different. Now being in a emotional relationship its so powerful. Never meeting him yet, never to even touch him yet, I am soooo in love w/ him and can't wait for the time to come where I can!
2007-11-30 15:31:22 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Pure Evil♥ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
an emotional affair is almost worst than a physical affair. when he is having a physical it hurts but you know that you are better in the end for him. when it is an emotional affair it makes you feel like the failure. I say if anyone is making you feel like this you need to get this guy out of your life. and how dare he send your joint money to some other woman!
2007-11-30 15:28:43 · answer #7 · answered by Roxanne G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
emotional affair or affair. no difference. after 14 years of marriage my ex was having this emotional affair with his secretary which ended up in an affair and now they are living together. no difference.
2007-11-30 15:29:36 · answer #8 · answered by Babe 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes there is a an emotional relationship, you must of missed the Tyra Banks show on all types of cheating and this was one of them check it out...http://tyrashow.warnerbros.com/show_recaps/show_recap_wed116.html
if you look at the couple in the middle, that guy was guilty of emotional cheating, because he consoled his co-worker when she was having a bad day, and gives her hugs at times.
2007-11-30 15:41:43 · answer #9 · answered by Muslimah S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i spent 20 years with a husband the cheated the whole time(yea, stupid i know). one thing i learned is that if you feel
like theres something wrong theres about a 99% chance that your right. dont let him convience you that your not.
2007-11-30 15:59:17 · answer #10 · answered by stephanie h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋