☼ How about an amusing story that includes these words in this order....You up for it?

Question

Icing On The Cake
19th Nervous Breakdown
Rumor Has It
Romeo and Juliet
Heart Breaking
So Lovely
Something's Gotta Give
Are You Suggesting
Self Confidence
Man, It Feels Good To Be Happy

► If you wish to answer, please post your intent so I don't close on you........
ouch !! ◄

►►► http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AvhzpuzlwoK2USMaX2UhVSvty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20071130154637AAMCWou

OOPS!!! I forgot that I had listed that link when I resolved it....But no one posted "intent"

█◄► Okay.....Here's a new one:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071130211438AAi3ZtX&pa=FYd1D2bwHTHwLbxiHOw7Ru87PY_90lDm5_nQuAWHMbnQlw--&paid=asked&msgr_status=

███
And THIS ONE:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ajvzt6piUCQyMnQ5pevtQILsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20071201074845AA1h0y3

Answer 1

Guido was just finishing the icing on the cake he'd baked for the Tupperman Bar Mitzvah when his mother, Rosalie, stormed into his bakery.

"Oh, God," thought Guido. "Here comes my 19th nervous breakdown."

"Rumor has it, Mr. High and Mighty, that you are dating that tramp from the wrong side of the tracks!" she shrieked, causing all of the popovers in the display case to deflate like so many used condoms.

"Ma," Guido said sheepishly with his frosting covered fingers spread wide in a gesture of appeasement, "it ain't like that at all. We aren't like some friggin' Romeo and Juliet here....I promise!" He crossed himself with a quick, practiced motion.

"I think it's just heartbreaking," his mother went on, "that you can't date a NICE girl from our neighborhood. There are many who are so lovely...." her voice trailed off with despair.

"Something's gotta give", muttered Guido under his breath so his steamroller of a mother wouldn't hear him.

"Say, Ma," he asked in the sweetest way he knew how, "what would you say if I told you that I have a new love---one who can cook and clean and sew. You know, all that domestic crap you love so much?"

Rosalie stared at him in amazement. "Are you suggesting that I might finally have something in common with someone you're dating? Be still my beating heart!"

His mother beamed and grabbed Guido by his cheeks and gave each one a big kiss before squeezing them like so much bread dough.

Guido's self confidence soared. "Man, it feels good to be happy," he said to himself, much relieved to have dodged the bullet again this time with his mother.

Rosalie left the bakery humming a tune to herself. Guido watched out the window as she waltzed down the street. Then he went to the phone on the wall and dialed.

"Hello, Alfredo? Sorry to bother you at work, babe. I know it's your lunch hour and you have to get back to teaching your Home Economics class, but how's about you and me gettin' together for a little....ba da bing? Eh? Good! See you in five....kiss, kiss!"

Answer 2

There is no ICING ON THE CAKE and there is only one hour before the party. It I don't suffer my 19TH NERVOUS BREAKDOWN by the end of the day, it will be a medical miracle. RUMOR HAS IT Bob Dylan is going to be here having heard that Silva AND Sunshine were both going to be here. He loves a crazy party.

I am still surprised that he will be playing Juliet in another remake of ROMEO AND JULIET, but if Cate Blanchet can play him in the Todd Haynes movie "I'm Not There," I don't see why he can't play Juliet. Knowing Bob's talent, I bet he will give a HEART BREAKING performance.

The decorations for the holiday party are SO LOVELY, I just hope the guests are as in to "Alice's Restaurant" as I am. Setting up the hall to resemble the church where Alice lived with Ray and Fasha the dog was not easy. Getting the bell tower contructed took some time and quite a bit of money. When I asked for real bells to be installed, the bank told me "SOMETHING'S GOTTA GIVE." You can't afford all that fake trash for the main floor of the church AND real bell's in the bell tower. Fake trash is very expensive since the price of oil went up. Remember a lot of it is not just paper but fake half eaten food, pizza's and such. That stuff is very expensive.

"ARE YOU SUGGESTING I give up the idea of authenticity" for my party" I asked. "I'm afraid you can't have it all," they said. Either the bells or the trash have to go.

It was then I had a great idea. I don't live that far from Stockbridge, Massachussettes, and even though Arlo and his friends picked up the trash from the side of the road way back then, there is probably plenty more by now. So I got a bunch of my friends together and we rode the backroads around Stockbridge, Massachussettes on Thanksgiving day looking for trash (you recall from the song that the dump is closed on Thanksgiving, but that was the only day we could all get together) and found enough to make the chuch look very authentic. No one like Officer Obie (God rest his soul) interfered with our picking up the trash, but we did take twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy photographs of our work just to commemorate the day.

My SELF CONFIDENCE is restored. I am sure the guests will have a grand time loading all that trash into the trucks and taking out to the Stockbridge, Massachussettes town dump, which was Arlo's original plan that Thanksgiving day.

MAN IT FEELS GOOD TO BE HAPPY, I just hope we don't make too much more trash during the party and overwhelm our ability to haul it all. The way that Silva can go through liquor, there are bound to be a lot of bottles, and from what I know, Dylan can pack away his share too. But still, if I can get some frosting on this cake before the party starts, I think everything will be OK. Come on down too if you like. We are holding it in the Legion hall which is just a half a mile from the railroad track. Be sure to come around the back. See ya there.

Answer 3

"That's it!" cried Freddie, slamming the hood of his 1960 Desoto. The car had been acting up all day and this was just icing on the cake. The radiator had boiled over again. He stood up, smearing his grease-stained hands on his red and green plaid pants. He was going to be late for his date with Marilyn. He felt a headache coming on and his right eye started to twitch. "Lord, here comes my 19th nervous breakdown," he whined, slapping his hand to his eye. More grease smeared.

He left the steaming hunk of metal on the side of the road and walked across the street to Rumor Has It. It was the local hang-out for all of the town misfits. Freddie was a regular. He stuck some coins in the ancient phone attached to the back wall. There were a couple of clicks, then ringing at the other end.

"Hello?" said a demure voice. He heart melted whenever he heard it. "Marilyn? It's Fred. I've had a little problem with my car, but don't worry. I might be late but I'll be there. Don't worry, my Sweet." That was the way they had talked on the Internet. He had met her there a little over a month ago, and from the beginning, they had used endearments. Then, they exchanged phone numbers and had called each other every day. He couldn't wait to see her. The thought of being with her made him giddy. Yeah, they were a regular Romeo and Juliet. His heart was so full it was near to breaking, thinking about something so lovely.

He went back to the Desoto. It was cooler now. He turned the ignition and.....nothing. He couldn't believe his bad luck! This piece of junk wasn't going to keep him from meeting his intended. He got out, slammed the door and kicked the front tire savagely. "Something's gotta give!" he yelled. Just then, his friend Hank turned the corner in his company truck. If Freddie hadn't heard the grinding gears he still could have made out the truck by the smell. Hank was a local pig farmer. He pulled up alongside the Desoto. "What's the problem, son?" he asked Freddie. "She die on you again?" "Yeah," sighed Freddie, "and I have a very important date! I'm going to meet the woman of my dreams and the damned thing's conked out on me!" He shoved his hands into his pockets. "Well," said Hank, "there's room in back for one more." Freddie looked aghast. "Are you suggesting I ride with the pigs?" Hank shrugged his shoulders. In the end, they made enough room in the cramped cab for Freddie to squeeze in.

The truck pulled up to the trailer park and Freddie got out. He found the little blue single-wide sitting at the end of the street, just where she said it would be. His throat was dry and his palms were sweaty. He swallowed hard. Come on, he thought, have courage. No backing out now. Go forth with self-confidence! He took the porch steps two at a time and rang the bell.

She was a vision in red spandex. White-blonde hair and a winning smile. He hadn't expected the eyeglasses with lenses that looked like the bottoms of Coke bottles, but what the heck. He wasn't much of a looker, so it didn't hurt if she didn't see him very well. She sat him down on the afghan covered sofa and they had a good talk. Freddie was on cloud nine and Marilyn never looked happier. "Hey," he said, rubbing his palms together. I think the Bionic Woman is coming on in a few minutes." "Oh, goody!" said Marilyn excitedly. "I'll get the beer and pork rinds!" They settled down and dug into the snacks. Did life get any better than this? Freddie didn't think so. He sighed contentedly, thinking: Man, it feels good to be happy.

Answer 4

“Oh she’s so lovely, Horatio, but how am I to tell her how I feel?” Said Romeo mournfully. Romeo’s heartbreaking plea to his friend was the 3rd time this week and he had just about had enough. Romeo had just scratched “Romeo and Juliet Forever” into the table top at the 4 star Horseshoe Inn and Horatio was scrambling to find something to cover it over. Horatio said to Romeo “My dear smitten friend dost thou not know that true love prevails in such matters? The love column in the Avon Times tells us so. Thou needst a measure of self confidence to believe the object of thy desires will be thine anon. Rumour has it…” He whispered “Rumour has it Juliet has verily been speaking loudly of you to her friends”. Romeos eyes lit up “are you suggesting….that my name might….have a chance to…..to…to find a place in her heart, as well as her mouth?”

Meanwhile pacing the floor of her bedroom Juliet was seriously looking down the barrel at her 19th nervous breakdown in 2 days. She had been tearing petals off daisies saying repeatedly “he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves…” and pacing the floor and pulling at her hair and she was a total mess.
Her best friend and guardian Gwyneth was trying her best to soothe her friend but seem to be losing the battle. “Something’s gotta give,” thought Gwyneth. “How can I fix this tortured heart I see before me?”

She hurried downstairs and across the courtyard. As she rounded the corner she bumped into Horatio, who was on his way to give a secret message from Romeo to Juliet. The icing on the cake to this necessary emergency dash was to run into “such a fair and buxom maiden, who could surely pull mine heartstrings any time of her choosing” he was later heard to confess to Romeo.

So between them Horatio and Gwyneth managed to get Romeo and Juliet together. But alas and verily the star-crossed lovers had a rough road to travel and their tragic end is well documented.

And as for Horatio and Gwyneth? Not long after that happy circumstantial meeting Horatio and Gwyneth began their own mating ritual and I believe they lived quite happily ever after, which is always nice to see….…but I digress. Gwyneth was in fact heard to utter in a moment of bliss ….”I and my love are one. My future is looking bright with my man, it feels good to be happy”.

The moral of this story is “being a good and loyal friend sometimes pays off”.