My husband's sister just left her spouse. They are getting a divorce. The problem is she is seeing somebody already. Her husband is being very generous in the divorce because he has no idea about the cheating. I feel that it is wrong for this to be happening. She is a drunk (supposedly recovering) and has treated him like crap for years. She has ruined their credit. And it just kills me that once again she is screwing him over. While I do think he is an idiot for putting up with this for all these years, he still was a good husband to her. If I did tell him, I would do it anonymously. My husband agrees that he should be told but we do know for sure. I know that he would stand up for himself more in the divorce if he knew all the facts. They have 2 teenage kids living with him. She has stated that she doesn't want the kids to stay with her. Why should she get any support from him if she has a new man to take care of her and she won’t have the kids?
2007-11-30 10:02:56 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
she has no right to a dime or any generosity, he needs to know, maybe he will be able to see reality than. if she doesn't have the kids she has no right to anything.
2007-11-30 10:07:54 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he is getting a divorce from her .. then he will be rid of her soon .. and forever.
Telling him of the affair may just make him make the divorce rougher .. but it might be an eye-opener for him, too. You know the situation best ... just consider if it would protect him .. and be a good thing he should know. I know it would hurt him ... but if it were me .. I would want to know ... however - some people can't handle the truth about things such as this.
If the kids live with her - then the Courts will give her child support .. it's the law.
If the kids don't live with her .. she will not get child support.
Some States require that support is given to the spouse if they have lived together for a certain amount of years ,, and more information is involved. The new man will not matter .. the divorce is between her & her husband .. and the years they shared together.
Soon .. they will both be divorced from each other .. and each can start new lives.
2007-11-30 10:15:11 · answer #2 · answered by Tara 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can tell him anonymously but if you know his attorney you can also just tell him because he may have resources to make good use of the information - a private detective, for example, and your brother in law would probably take the information more seriously if his own attorney brought it to his attention. The fact that her own brother is on the side of the soon to be ex speaks volumes to me about how he views his sister and the fact that she doesn't want the kids to stay with her tells me a lot about her as well. she shouldn't get a dime from him!!
2007-11-30 10:21:38 · answer #3 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What do you mean by being very generous. In a divorce is should be split even between the two. Where is the lawyer in this? The lawyer should be making sure it is done equally. Maybe you should talk to the lawyer.
2007-11-30 10:48:32 · answer #4 · answered by Dance 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As hard as it may be, you need to stay out of it. Remember, at the end of the day it is she who is your family and even though she's wrong and you feel sorry for your brother in law, she and your husband are blood. And your husband's an your loyalty belong to her.
2007-11-30 10:10:27 · answer #5 · answered by dumbrowski31 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would let your husband handle this problem. You are right but it's his family and you really need to stay out of this one . Your heart is in the right place but you don't want to get in the middle. GOOD LUCK
2007-11-30 10:18:47 · answer #6 · answered by carmey1173 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She should not get support if she does not have the kids with her (but why don't she want her kids)? I don't think you should say anything about the affair just let her get on with her life and really it is not any of your business.
2007-11-30 10:19:43 · answer #7 · answered by answer machine 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If paying Alimony is going to make her go away, then it's worth it. The father and the kids will do great with out her. Stay out of it, live & let live.
2007-11-30 15:59:47 · answer #8 · answered by nycrunner69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would tell him why the heck should he give her money beings he has the kids? Geesh kids are spendy enough let alone teenage ones!
M y vote is tell him before he gives her another dime
2007-11-30 10:12:41 · answer #9 · answered by ღKrissyღ 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes,she wouldn't get any support except for maybe alimony depending on the situation.
2007-11-30 10:09:38 · answer #10 · answered by Martha 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell your husband to tell his brother to his face. They gotta watch out for one another's backs.
2007-11-30 10:08:28 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋