I am lost and need to seek guidance for advice. I have discovered that my stepfather has been cheating on my mother. We thought everything was okay and that his continued absence was due to his hectic job, which requires him to travel quite often. I now have sufficient evidence that he's cheating on my mother with another women. Although,I have discovered this horrible notion, I am struggling to confront him or my mother about his deceptiveness. I have known him for half of my life, and I always viewed him as my father, but the dishonesty and deception that continues to linger in my house-hold is buliding an excessive amount of anger in me. I keep praying that he'll come to his senses and do the right thing, but that's not happening. My whole family is dependent on him and he has also been paying for my education, but I know that love has no price.
What do I do?
2007-11-30 09:37:53 · 13 answers · asked by Jacopo G 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
wow that was deep!! well maybe tell him that you know,,, with out your mom being around,, and tell him to either cut it out,,, or tell her,,, or you will tell her bottom line,, that is YOUR MOTHER,,, and you can't allow her to be played for the love of money,
hope everything works out for the best without anyone getting hurt..
2007-11-30 09:43:58 · answer #1 · answered by pumkin 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You're very mature, and I'm sure it's hard, I'm not sure if going to the source is the answer either, he may try to deny unless youre proof is that overwhelming. The disrespect he's giving you're mother is not a good example either, see what he does when you approach him, if he denies or becomes overly angry with your knowledge, you're gonna have to break down and tell your mother, I could never imagine how hard that would be, but if your relationship with her is strong and he realizes you mean business, you have to do what's ethically right, Good Luck!
2007-11-30 12:34:28 · answer #2 · answered by Dolly J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you hope to gain by either telling your mother or confronting your step-father?
Seriously.
Also, unless you have either seen your step-father doing the act, or he told you about it, you really don't have proof. You might have a lot of very incriminating circumstantial evidence, but things aren't always as they appear.
Regardless, it's between your step-father and your mother. You can abhor his behavior, but how he acts is really his choice.
Focus instead on why you are feeling such anger, and please talk to a counselor SOON to work on your feelings and issues before this blows up and you do something you regret.
I'm sorry, this is probably not what you wanted to hear. Best wishes to you.
2007-11-30 09:47:08 · answer #3 · answered by kyeri y 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First talk to your stepfather.If he wants to be with the other woman,he should tell your mother.I know it's hard ,but there's two sides to each story.Most people cheat because there needs are not being met.If he doesn't tell your mother, you need to so she can have a choice on what to do.
2007-11-30 10:15:07 · answer #4 · answered by lala 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to not do anything - as bad as this may sound - IT is none of your business! I know it doesn't feel right, but it is between your mom and him. Could you live with the fact that you broke up the family and caused a divorce?
I understand that this is also hurting you -so if you really feel you want to confront him - do it - but just to tell him that you feel hurt by his actions - don't give him and ultimatum of tell her or you will - or anything like that!
Have you thought about the fact that if you know - maybe your mom knows too - and just chooses not to do anything about it - or is not wanting to believe it??? Maybe she doesn't want to break up the family?!?
Good Luck!
2007-11-30 09:50:36 · answer #5 · answered by Me 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Talk to your step father and tell him what you think I mean are you 100% sure that he is cheating on your mom and if he is telll him to come clean that is going to better this way and you are not going to have as much problems and you are not going to feel bad about it anymore.
2007-11-30 09:54:26 · answer #6 · answered by Lost 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON'T TALK TO HIM.....This could hurt alot of people if you are wrong... Your mother needs to be the one to find out so you can not tell her... Its hard to explain, but sometimes when people hear from someone that their spouse is cheating they tend to not trust the whole situtation... Being in deniel...Find a way to let him expose himself... You are very resoursefull. Just, don't get in the middle cause you will never get out of it...
2007-11-30 09:48:53 · answer #7 · answered by sweetgirl 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you have good evidence you should tell your mother the truth about what he is doing. It is up to her if she believes you are not. The point is that you told her whay is going on.
2007-11-30 09:46:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tough one. I think at this point, it is best to leave yourself out of it. Because this is the relationship between your mom and your stepdad. If she asks you, then tell her what you know. If she does not, then keep it to yourself.
2007-11-30 09:48:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Talk to your step father about what you know....and give him the opportunity to come clean with your mother...and if doesn't...then you should....
2007-11-30 09:43:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋