So, we've been together for 2 years. When we first got together we talked about marriage ALL the time! now, never. He wants a baby and a house with me, but when I bring up marriage he acts like he doesnt hear me. I tell him I want marriage, house then baby but he seems to disagree. Whats going on in his head?
2007-11-30 07:14:30 · 10 answers · asked by <3 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am going to write a poem for you:
First comes love
Then comes marriage
Then comes Mary with the baby carriage
Do not under any circumstances have a child without getting married, because if you do, this man will never marry you. Don't buy a house with him either...If he continues to turn a deaf ear on the subject of marriage, give him an untimatum and if he doesn't have a change of heart, I would definitely consider ending the relationship. That is why I don't believe in living with someone without the benefit of marriage...All men get complacent and they get in a nitch, and if you don't stand up and demand what you want from the relationship they will just go along. I would consider leaving him for a while, and if he doesn't come after you with an engagement ring in hand, then forget him and move on..There are plenty of fish in the sea.
2007-11-30 13:33:04 · answer #1 · answered by cardgirl2 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I don't know why nature made women and men so different in that aspect. He is happy with how his life is at this time, doesn't see a need to make changes, and is not for the phisical aspect (like they say why buy the cow if you get the milk free) because if things were like that, he finds that with someone else and is not doing it. My ex put pressure on me and she is my ex. I decided to never have to deal with ultimatums from anyone, if someone would leave me and find someone else because I don't get married, that person in my eyes is after a marriage and not with me because she wants, if I am in that level of importance, I just let the person go, I know I may ask a lot, but that's where I have my standards and it works for me. If someone stays with me, under no matter what situation, married or single and will take me as I am, probably that's the person I will consider, but like I said "probably". Do this, think if you love him or not, and do what you think is right.
2007-11-30 07:46:16 · answer #2 · answered by livingthe30s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say if you are living together or just dating. But I have several single (men) friends, and they just want to play house without getting tied down. So if you are doing all the things married couples do (living together, having sex, etc..) why would he want to screw that up with marriage. You know what they say, why pay for the mike if the cow is free.....think about it
Or he could just be scared of making a commitment.
2007-11-30 07:43:27 · answer #3 · answered by harold 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To some people, women included marriage is not important. You can love someone and want them to be your life partner without having to marry them. I personally think marriage is important for a vareity of reasons but I don't think it is any sign that he doesn't love you. If you can't be happy without marriage you need to sit him down and explain that this could be a potential deal breaker for you and if he does love you whether he thinks marriage is important or not he should compromise and try and see things your way.
2007-11-30 07:37:07 · answer #4 · answered by Sweetie28 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage isnt for everyone. Sounds like he wants the family house and picket fence but not the wedding vows. Depends on what you want. Noone in the forum can tell you what to do. You need to talk to your man.
2007-11-30 07:33:42 · answer #5 · answered by memyslf&I 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how did we come to this where there is no marriage and a guy thinks it is a good deal for you to have a child and responsibilities with him but no commitment.??? i dont care what you do, after 2 years its hard to leave, but your guy has been learning that marriage will cost him half of what he has if he divorces you, so to him the better answer is to not marry you and keep it casual. that is what he is thinking. i guarantee it. you need to break it off with him. what he is doing is disrespectful of you and toying with your time and love. if you tolerate it, you will lose your self respect. you are warned.
2007-11-30 07:46:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Scared? Unsure? Who knows. You'll have to ask him what he thinks about marriage. And you'll have to tell him if you want marriage first before the house and the kids. Talk it out with him.
2007-11-30 07:21:06 · answer #7 · answered by Jacqueline D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like he wants his cake and be able to eat it too! If he won't marry and abide by YOUR moral code, then do NOT buy a house and do NOT have a baby with this guy! Its like he wants his escape clause....be able to walk out any time he wants without the legal implications of having to get a divorce. Not my kind of relationship!
2007-11-30 07:22:10 · answer #8 · answered by Brutally Honest 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He does not want you as his wife. He just want you to be the mother of his child and take care of the household. He does not want to serve you, just for you to serve him.
2007-11-30 07:21:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Isn't it obvious?
Stop telling yourself lies and listen to the truth.
Good luck.
2007-11-30 07:21:03 · answer #10 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋