Was I too wimpy?

Question

I was in line at the convenience store last night and a man in front told the child with him, "Put that milk (a pint carton) back, I ain't got no money to spend on junk like that." Then he proceeded to buy $10 worth of lottery tickets. I wanted so badly to call him on it but didn't have the nerve. As soon as I was back at home, I wished that I had either bought the milk for the child or read him the riot act. What would you have done?

Thanks for the affirmative feedback. It had been bothering me and I do feel better now.

Answer 1

Oh Gosh, what a tough decision. I think you probably made a safe smart choice. Not stepping into someones business was good on your part especially not knowing how that person may have reacted towards you. However, I would have wanted to say something as well and bought the milk. And when you get home and think about it, you think of how horrible it was of you to not buy it and to tell him off. Unfortunately, not everyone in this world treats their children fairly. And if you would have bought it you have to think of what the repercussions might have been on the child. He might not of said anything to you and then lashed out on him. Just a thought but it happens these days.

Answer 2

I like riverrat's idea; quietly get the tag number and then call the abuse hotline and report what you saw. In fact; I have done just that in a similar situation.

You have no way of knowing what the man's relationship to the child is; he may not be related to the child in any way. You can't know if there was a good reason for denying the milk. If he was bullying a small child over a pint of milk, then there is no telling how he would react to your intervening. Attacking you is one possibility, but a worse possibility would be for him to let your comments slide until he has the kid alone and then yelling at or smacking the child around. It happens.

I truly understand the urge to do something immediately. But anyone who bullies a kid can be very unpredictable. Calling in a complaint is the only thing I can think of that might stand a chance of helping. I smile at the kids, but keep my head low.

Added in EDIT: Sorry my answer is not liked by some folks. I prefer to err on the side of kids when adults behave harshly towards them.

Answer 3

I would have bought the milk for the child, then turned to the male & cut him a new a** *ole. I am that sort of person. Full speed ahead & da** the torpedoes.
We all have gotten into that da*n mind set, that it is none of our business-bull s**t!!!
That kid will grow up never knowing that a stranger wanted to help but fear got in the way. How will that child grow up now?
We all see & hear stuff like this on a regular basis, & most of us turn away & wish later we had done something.
I can assure you that by the time I got through with that piece of dung, the cops & children's services would have been involved. Would I have gone to jail? I don't know or care-I care about the kid.

Answer 4

If you had offered to buy the milk for the child it might have made the man angrier and he could have taken it out on the poor youngster. I can only imagine what life is like for this child. I know you feel sad about this but you probably did the right thing by not saying or doing anything.

Answer 5

But she only wanted a little carton of milk for crying out loud!
I would have probably been tempted to kick him in the * ******
but would have said nothing. Why? Because he sounds like a bully and I would figure that if I tried to buy the milk or say anything to him he might smack the little girl when they got to the car for " causing trouble and embarrassing him." No doubt
he will get his in due time. Hopefully this was just a one-time occurance and he was just having an 'off' day.

Answer 6

Bought the milk .The riot act just might have got the child in trouble....If he was A Big jerk and told me NO! my child does need you to buy her/him milk..... then I would have said I would like to buy you a lottery ticket to please let me give you a gift. Then bought both...It would be for the child...
but no you are not a wimp we are all differnt that is what makes the world go around. What you did just might have been what those two needed to happen....

Answer 7

Maybe the man already spent his money on groceries & they had milk at home for the boy to drink. Maybe the boy had a milk allergy & asked for something that he shouldn't have. Maybe that $10 didn't belong to the man with the child. He could have just been picking them up for a person who sent him to the store for them. A lot of people don't like to be seen on store cameras & send others to do these things for them.

If the man wasn't being outwardly abusive to the child, then you weren't being wimpy because there was nothing to be wimpy about. It's best to avoid interfering with fighting couples & parent /child issues if there is nothing to be gained by doing so.

What would I have done? Nothing, unless there was actual abuse taking place, other than just think to myself, "what a jerk"!

Answer 8

I recently saw a man make a child put back a small juice drink and buy himself a 12 pack of beer. I did nothing either. I suppose we are getting too polite in the later years. Like the other person said I was afraid it would make it worse on the child especially since he was buying beer.

Answer 9

After reading many of the previous answers I think that Mooshe may have a point. I do remember many times my kids wanted something that would have been good for them but I knew they wouldn't eat or drink it, so why waste the money. In a situation like yours you only see one side of the picture and that may lead to some kind of unnecessary confrontation. I think you did the right thing. Sometimes we assume too much.

Answer 10

Today people will shoot you for less than that.

A 21-year-old Tallahassee man died after being shot in the head during what police called a parking garage dispute here in Gainesville, FL.