How do you help someone who is depressed?

Question

This goes deep. Someone has had a bad life, bad things done to them, and, for some unknown reason, bad things just keep happening. Actual person (not me...family): sexual torture, cancer, amputation, bad skin condition, feeling of being ugly and not wanted, divorce; alone and choosing to live miles away from family......???

Answer 1

Helping someone who is depressed is a very difficult task.

Two of my friends went through very dark times when they were depressed and it was quite challenging to support them. Often people who are in a bad place lash out, they are easily upset or annoyed and struggle with day to day life.

First of all I would ask does this person feel able to talk to their doctor? In some cases, medication can be prescribed which helps correct the balance of chemicals in the brain, after which therapies may be more effective.

Professional counselling can help, but support from friends and family will also go a long way - giving the person the opportunity to talk about things and being there for them.

The Samaritans offer free, confidential emotional support at any time of the day or night by phone, text message or email. They do not offer opinions or advice, but will be there to listen should you or your family member ever need to get things off your chest. http://www.samaritans.org/

Well done for being there for your relative - keep up the good work and look after yourself too.

Warmest regards,

Arwen

Answer 2

You're right this is deep. I would suggest this person get some counseling. But, if they refuse just try to be there for that person. Try to make him/her laugh as much as possible. Also encourage this person not to wallow in self pity. The more we wallow, the worse we feel and the more bitter we get. Also, encourage this person to change things the things that can be changed. See a dermatologist about the skin condition. Go to a beautician and get a hair cut. That usually makes people feel better. Tell them that they are better off without the spouse that divorced them. Anything else that you can think of to help that person get some self confidence back.

Answer 3

There is no simple answer because all these aspects contribute to the person's sense of low self esteem. There are medical and psychological routes to follow but it has to start by finding some stars in the person night sky! Some things they do see as talents or positives. There needs to be a point to making changes and trying otherwise it is simply another chore and not one that the person will take too. I wish you and them well, it all starts with communication and having a friend or 2 who will make th effort for no self reward other than being there and being true.
Best wishes
Andy

Answer 4

What a lot of terrible things to happen, no wonder they are feeling depressed. Although talking to them and asking if there is anything you can do, listen to what they say, actually hear what they say, dont misinterpret what you think you want to hear. Sometimes you may need to suggest that they may need to seek medical advice and make sure that if you want to if you offer your support then make sure you can stick to it. Sometimes though just being there, perhaps not even talking its just the fact someone is there. You may if you are really concerned tell them that you think they need to see someone, and you will go with them. Its very hard for a depressed person to acknowledge when they need help, they always think they are coping, until there not then it does not matter. I know i have been there, but i had help and support from my sister and family. I hope this helps you. Helen.

Answer 5

someone with that many issues can't be helped by a novice (no offense.. I'm not skilled enough to help that person either). Best you can do is be supportive and make sure they see a counselor (I'm sure they have.. but make sure they follow the advice and keep going.. drive them if you have to.. be a support)

Really.. just being there is the best you can do... you'll piss them off sometimes (because they won't understand how you could care about them so much.. and will try to push you away)... but just keep on keeping on.

Answer 6

Its difficult to change things for a depressed person and I know that this is a standard answer but just be there as much as you can, the problem is you can start to get depressed too and that just don't help anyone. I talk from experience!

Answer 7

this is a tough one, but somewhere along the line you have to accept that love for yourself is the road out of and to salvation for yourself and your self worth, and planting that seed and changing a way of thinking that is more positive and loving is the only way up from the place that you are in. We all have the strength to change, but the first step is always the wisdom to know we have to change, courage to admit that we have to and the strength of will to carry it out. start to make those changes for your self, or by professional help, and you will be surprised what help and love comes your way and the life you wish for could be a reality. Good luck the first step starts with you .....

Answer 8

I went through the whole cancer and depression thing myself. Clinical depression has to be treated professionally. The problem is getting the person to go to the doctor about it...do whatever it takes to get her there even if you have to tie her up and drag her.

Answer 9

Be there supporting and listening to them. They really need to seek help for themselves via their GP who can either prescribe medication or a referral for counselling. It sounds like a lot of bad things have befallen your friend who could benefit from counselling to help put things in perspective. I wish him/her better mental health.

Answer 10

I have a friend who suffers from bipolar disorder and i think mostly just being their and never doing any thing to hurt them emotionally