Three months ago, I met a wonderful woman who happens to have a disability. Believe me, I only see HER, not her wheelchair! But as "things progress", it's very obvious that we're on the "same page". Already I'm sure she's THEE woman for me. But I'm floundering in deep water with initiating intimacy! My respect for her overcomes my ineptitude, about exactly what would be appropriate and when. She is paralyzed from her waist down (diving accident) since age 19. She's 22 now, and has never "tried anything" since her accident. I'd appreciate any feedback from someone who has walked in my shoes...or rolled in her wheels. Thanx...JBL
2007-11-28 12:46:26 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
Bravo for you being able to see the person and not the disability. Your best bet is to communicate what you wrote here to her. Ask her. You can start out by saying.....I don't mean this to be disrespectful, I think that you are beautiful, you excite me, and I would like to know how I can please you sexually. If she is open, then experiment, find out what she can do, and what she can't. Move slowly with her, let her know that she can communicate anything to you about her comfort or lack of it. Possibly attend a doctor visit with her, with her permission of course, so you can really understand the exact nature of her disability. Eg. can she sense anything in the way of sexual contact. What are her limitations, etc. A third party such as a doctor may help you both to feel more comfortable about asking questions about sex. You can pose the question to the doctor if you wish, but both of you are present and can hear the answer, which may evolve to one or both of you having input. Love and compassion when given freely is something she will pick up on, and in the end will make her more comfortable. Best of luck for you both.
2007-11-28 12:59:58 · answer #1 · answered by perioligament 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, you sound like your in love a little...if you care about this woman the way you sound then talk to her about this. (seriously). I'm sure she has thought about this in her mind. (maybe not with you so to speak, but her "private" life in general). If you dont feel comfortable just yet, maybe try doing some research on your own that way you'll be a little prepared on what she might say or even how to approach the subject. There is every topic in the world on the web site Google, you might even find some information on there. It is WONDERFUL that you can see past her being in this situation, because if you really think about it, we're all handicapped in some way or the other. good luck to the both of you and Merry Christmas.
2007-11-28 20:54:09 · answer #2 · answered by Jamiep6 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know quite a few individuals in a w/c who still appreciate the intimacy of holding oneanother, kissing, touching and yes---sex. You need to talk to her about this and not flounder around trying to second guess what she is feeling or thinking.
Come right out and ask--if she has any sexual feelings below the waist? How she would feel about sexual activity.
Only SHE knows the answers to these questions. Be fair to her and yourself and start some open communication.
2007-11-28 20:51:57 · answer #3 · answered by Seablanco1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best person to talk about with this issue would be your young lady friend. According to link below the most important issue is communication
http://sci.washington.edu/info/forums/reports/sex_personal.asp
The internet is a great place to help find more info..
2007-11-28 20:57:05 · answer #4 · answered by knittinmama 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do u love her bcoz of sympathy?talk to her honestly if she also loves u.
2007-11-28 21:03:12 · answer #5 · answered by robert KS LEE. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋