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It is unlikely that someone that has gone to the extent that a cheater has to in order to cheat, i.e., lying, sneaking, exposing you to disease, etc., is still going to be who you thought they were. It is also probable that it will happen again. There would have to be VERY extreme circumstances for a second chance, such as the person was not in control of their faculties, it only happpened once, and they came to you and confessed with sincere regret. Then this person would have to be willing to seek counseling for the problem that led to the infidelity. That would be the ONE AND ONLY situation where I would ever consider a second chance. I made it clear to my husband that if it ever happened, he better want a divorce, because that was what he was going to get. He did it, and he got it.

2007-11-28 09:05:03 · answer #1 · answered by Soapflake 4 · 1 0

I would be absolutely devastated. Even thinking about what I would do now makes my heart hurt. We have a 2 year old daughter together so I would be even more upset for her sake because I grew up without a father and I never want that for my children and I would want to move far, far away from him just in case I would run into him and his new love! I would definitely kick him to the curb right after I kicked him in the ba lls! And NO WAY! I would never give him a second chance - I truely believe that once a cheater always a cheater.

2007-11-28 08:37:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

My first husband, he got a second and third chance...and then that was it. As bad as it was, it could never amount to the pain and damage my second husband caused with his abuse. I'd take a cheater over an abuser any day. None the less hind sight is 20/20...so I haven't really gotten back into the game of trying to find a lifelong partner.

2007-11-28 09:06:19 · answer #3 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 0 0

Happened, I thought about everything even though life sucked with her anyway, she was mean and nasty and plain scary as the years went by but being a man I had to consider the reality that I could lose my son in court. Once I secured a good female lawyer and worked things through and was POSITIVE that I would be among the most rare men on the planet- those with custody, I filed for divorce. It was tough but 6 yrs later life is SOOOOO much better

2007-11-28 08:39:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Just depends on how much you have vested in your relationship/marriage. I do believe people can change, therefore I believe in second chances. If you have children and a lot of time spent together, you may want to go to a counselor. Ask why he cheated.... there is never a good excuse, but a therapist will ask the same question.

2007-11-28 08:38:29 · answer #5 · answered by Texas Girl 3 · 1 1

Every situtation is different; it is according to the cheating spouses reaction and actions after he or she is found out. If they were always faithful and it was a huge mistake, then I may do so, but I know I would never forgive a second time. They already would know the devistation it had on you and them and it would mean they purposely set out to cause pain to you.

2007-11-28 11:14:50 · answer #6 · answered by pussycat 5 · 0 0

It depends on the person, if they have always been a flirt nothing will stop them now. But if not, actually a good person just fell down a little yes they may deserve a second chance. Men are weak when it comes to these prescient women, they have to try and be strong. Best of luck!!

2007-11-28 08:39:21 · answer #7 · answered by hershey 3 · 0 1

Out the door they go on there a**. once a cheater always a cheater. After the trust is gone you don't have any thing left.

2007-11-28 08:58:01 · answer #8 · answered by ♥LS♥ 4 · 1 0

to be able to forgive would require a few things to happen, the cheater would have to be remorseful, and allow the hurting spouse to talk about it for as long as it took to get past it. he would have to make her understand that he knew what he did hurt, and he would have to show her by his actions, behavior, and decisions that he wanted to change. giving him a second chance is okay but if they do it to u again u shouldn't, unless u want to be a dumping ground.

2007-11-28 10:16:04 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 0 0

Before we got married my fiance and i spoke about this and we made it clear to each other that if etiher of us was to cheat then that would be the end of our relationship. It's hard to forgive that sort of thing and if you do then it will always be in the back of mind and in the end will destroy your relationship.
My answer is that i would not give a second chance.

2007-11-28 08:38:14 · answer #10 · answered by Hannah R 3 · 2 0

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