I Believe In The Ideal Of LOVE, Not The Reality?

Question

Is it weird that I believe in the ideal of LOVE. The concept. But not the reality? It's just like how I believe in the ideal of marriage. VERY MUCH! I love the ideal of marriage. But the reality. Well . . . we all know. I'm a big believer in the ideals, but not the reality. Is that weird?

I think that society has tainted the reality of these things for me so much. I think I'd rather settle for the imagination aspect. Feel's like a better way to go. Cause people seem to always let you down from I can see. Does that sound off to anyone?

I often consider a life of solitude. I'm a young 21 year old guy.

And No I'm not preaching a life of whoring around! Not my style.

Thoughts?

NOW I'M NOT SAYING THAT I LIVE IN A FAIRY TALE LAND!!!

I KNOW THE REALITY OF LIFE IS NOT PEFECT. THAT'S NOT WHY I'M SAYING WHAT I'M SAYING. LIFES NOT PERFECT I KNOW.

IT'S JUST YOU GOTTA LOOK AROUND. IT JUST DOESN'T SEEM WORTH IT SO MUCH OF THE TIME.

AND I HAVEN'T GOTTEN MY HEART BROKEN!

I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID MY AGE HUH?

Answer 1

My thought is that considering a life of solitude would be throwing away a potentially fulfilling life of love and marriage because it wouldn't be as perfect as your ideal. You're essentially saying, "If it's not perfect, I don't want it." How about coming down out of the clouds into the real world? While reality is not as fantastic as what you can imagine, it can still be pretty darned good.

Answer 2

I've been married for nearly 30 years. Keep in mind that everyone is human, we all make mistakes and fall short at times. You have to be able to give and take, forgive and work through any troubles you may have. Marriage is never perfect because people are never perfect, but as long as you love each other and care for each other, it can work. We've gone through many highs and lows - that's just life. I'd rather go through life with the one that I love than go it all alone. If and when you do meet the right person, you'll know. Just remember, any relationship takes work, commitment, trust and most of all love. It is well worth it.

Answer 3

You sound kind've bitter about something. Did some girl do you wrong?? sure, i guess people dream about what a relationship would be like and then they wake up and realize it is not always a bed of roses. me and my husband have had arguements and will have more. It is more about how you handle the problems that arise. to me the reality of love is beautiful...if you find the right one...me and my hubby argue but, at the end of he day I still have someone to hold at night, or have sex whenever i wanna have it(and not worry about std's!!!), or go on trips and see amazing things with the person you love. Or after a bad day, knowing you get to come home and he'll be there for you ready to take down whoever made your day bad:). No, it is not always a fairy tale , but it comes kind've close. You just have to find the right person.

Answer 4

I married the 2nd man I'd ever been with. Since he's repeatedly been unfaithful with the same woman, I now regret it. I feel it's the biggest mistake I've made. I would advise you to live life and always think about what it is you want in a relationship and what it is you have to offer. If you have a relationship with God, seriously pray for the woman He's made for you. Relationships are the hardest work you'll ever do. No one ever told me that. And, it's imperative that BOTH parties work hard and work together. If you feel that you cannot be faithful to her, love her, communicate with her, be honest with her for the rest of your life, don't marry. I often wish that I hadn't married. I have two children and I wonder what I'll tell them about relationships. Live your life to its fullest. Get an education, a great career, travel the world and experience new things. Don't allow life to beat you up as so many of us have. If I ever get the strength and wherewithal to divorce my husband, at this point, I feel I'll stay single. I love your nickname, and act it out...ALWAYS THINK. God bless u.

Answer 5

My thoughts: I prove you wrong every day of my life. Been married for seven years- happily married. We love one another as much as the day we first met. I don't see any reason to think that this will change. We communicate. We respect one another. We make the effort to work at it. We spend quality time together. We share our lives, good and bad. I wake up every day breathless in amazement at how lucky I am and how wonderful my relationship is.

I think two things are going on here with you. One is that you are young, idealistic, but just haven't found that special somebody. Being young makes you idealistic, naturally. But those ideals are applied to your inexperience, and that effects your conclusions.

Second, you are likely affected by the results of those around you. Many people do not know what real love is. Many people are lazy, selfish, or ignorant. This results in them being incapable of carrying on a permanent, loving relationship. When people succeed, it is hard to notice. They go about their lives, and look like everyone else who just got together. But when things come crashing down, hearts are broken, and everyone notices. You see all the people heart broken, and it is hard not to think that love is not real.

But even if some people fail at their relationships, or even if MOST people do... all it takes is for a few to succeed, and your theory of no love in reality comes crashing down. Like I said, I prove you wrong every day of my life. Many, many people do. If you take the right attitude in life, you'll prove yourself wrong someday, too. It'll be a glorious day.

Answer 6

I can honestly say that I am 100% in love with the idea of love. I have been for a long time and it has contributed to me settling for crap men because "I love them". I just realized this past year that the idea is NOT reality. That's a hard pill to swallow but I almost have it down. I don't think you're weird and I don't think you need to grow up...I think you've just realized what it took me 30 years to realize....good for you!

PS. Just try to keep your mind open...someone special may come along that you want to see the good and bad parts of love with.

Answer 7

To be honest, I think you need to grow up. The reality of life is that relationships are hard but the more you give the more you will recieve. You won't be satified being half-@$$ed in life.
But its not weird to feel the way you do, you are young and you will figure out what is really important to you in your own way, best of luck!

Answer 8

Well, you are 21 maybe thats why. I would say its ok, to think that way, its your belief. Live life, and you never know, you might meet someone and decide on marriage.

Answer 9

I think being "In Love" is a feeling but giving and showing love is a thing you choose to do

Answer 10

Read 1 Corinthians chapter 13, then you will know what love really is.