I have a 7 month old and I just found out that I am pregnant again.?

Question

I want to be excited but I am really scared. My boyfriend is excited and I want to be but I am so worried. I am worried about money, I am worried if I can even handle it and I am worried about what my family will think. I just can't hear any negitive thinking from them and I just feel like that is all I am going to get. I am a very strong person but this is a lot to take in right now. I am going to have a 1 1/2 year old when I have a newborn!! That freaks me out. How am I going to do this please help somebody. I need advice please!!

By the way all of you inconsiderate people I WAS on birth control so don't think you know more about the situation then you already do!!

Answer 1

I can relate to you very well.... So first off Congratulation's!
I was on birth control, as well, and breastfeeding so I never got my period. I got pregnant when my son was 4 month's old and didn't know it till I started feeling sick, as I didn't have a period to gauge it.
I had a lot of mixed feeling's from family and friends. People can be harsh, as you have seen on here, hurtful and cold. But you must take joy that you are creating a new life, and amazing miracle is happening again inside you. My husband was over the moon, but I was just like you, worried about a lot of things and with the whole birth process still fresh in my mind..... I was not too eager to have another one as I was still trying to get back to normal from my first. Most of my older family members where over the moon, they had children close together back in there day and it was normal! If they did it without all the modern stuff we have for babies, we can do it for sure. Friends said mean things like calling me Britney Spears as I was having them 13 month's apart, but you know what,you are brave and strong and you can do this! I did it and I am still (somewhat) sane...lol As other people said, don't worry, the babies can sense it. Stress is not going to help you or the baby....
First off it is hard, I am not going to lie, chasing after a one year old while massively pregnant is not easy. We found out what the sex of the second baby was , a girl!, so I went shopping at second hand shop's for girl clothes, but that is all you really need besides diaper's. Luckily you already have everything you need thanks to your first baby. Money is not that much of an issue as I thought it would be.
Secondly, you can handle it. You are already used to the lack of sleep, changing, burping, feeding and all the crying. It is all still fresh in your mind! Having two young kids is a juggling act. One is awake the other is sleeping and then they switch. But soon they start to sleep at the same time and you get to rest. Another thing, don't be to proud, be humble, ask for help! If someone offers to, take it and them some. Ask for a girlfriend or a family member to come by and help out for a couple hours here and there during the week. Just to have a shower, eat, get dressed or go for a walk ALONE to get out of the house. People will come around once they see that beautiful baby, they won't be able to resist.
Lastly, don't beat yourself up. You already are doing fine taking care of your first born and are doing a great job. It is scary becoming a parent. Everything is new and foreign. No one give you a handbook to take home from the hospital on how to take care of this baby.... But you make through it. You start to learn what certain cry's mean, the magic trick's to put them to sleep and the secret bouncy that stops's any crying..... So when this new bundle comes you already know and freshly remember how to take on the challenge called parenthood!
I personally think now that having them close together is a blessing. My son who is 19 month's loves his little sister. He gives her hugs all the time, he gets jealous sometimes when I hold her but he is still young enough not to understand the whole concept of sibling rivalry. And when they get older they with be build in playmates! I have had people tell me that they get along so well with there sibling's that are close in age. They are best friends for life!
So just love them with all your heart and they will turn out just fine :)

Answer 2

My youngest are exactly 18 months apart. Most days it isn't that bad! When I first had the new baby, the 18 month old could of cared less! She played with her toys and had a grand time! Some times you do have 2 babies crying at the same time, but you just deal with them one at a time. The oldest learned to sit in her highchair an extra 5 minutes while I finished feeding the baby. She learned to wait her turn at a very early age. Also, the baby learned I could come running as soon as he made a noise, but I would be there in just a minute! You learn to do alot of things with one hand because baby is in the other arm. My baby is getting ready to turn 1 on Friday, and looking back, there really haven't been to many days that were that bad! Lots of people have done it, and lots more will. I was worried about what everyone would say, so I didn't tell people till I was almost 8 months pregnant. I waited too long because everyone thought I was just gaining ALOT of weight, but when they found out it was just a baby, they were happy! You will servive, it will be fine, and just think what good friends your children will be when they get older!

Answer 3

Hey dont stress I am sure you will do fine!! I have a 7 and a 4 year old and a 17 month old and I will be having a new born in two weeks...It is going to take alot of adjusting and I am scared too but I know the minute I see this baby I will be so happy and do what I can for it...As for family and friends I had the same problem I was so worried about what THEY were going to think of me but after I got over that and tob people I felt better they were all really supportive ...Believe me this happens ONLY my 17 month old was a planned pregnancy !!!

Good luck and best wishes ;)

If you want you can contact me anytime

Answer 4

Oh honey. I know what you must be thinking...I have a 14 month old and seriously thought I was pregnant again when she was about 9 months...I understand your concerns about your family, but ultimately, this is between you and your boyfriend. Sit down and have a serious talk about your finances, look at your budget and see where you can cut back (cable can be under $20/month if you only get the very basics, can you consolidate your cell plans to a cheaper plan, eat in more often, turn down your thermostat a bit, etc etc.) and set a strict budget and stick to it. As far as clothing, I outfit my daughter almost entirely in thrift store clothes, and she is ALWAYS very clean and well dressed...I just go twice a year to their 50% sales and stock up. She never ever looks ragged, it's just a matter of what you pick out. And that way I can afford to pick up some toys there as well, and at one years old, she finds them fascinating and could care less they're used.

You may also seriously consider looking into government assistance. Depending on your income you could be eligible for medical, food, and formula (if you're not breastfeeding). Since you and your boyfriend aren't married, you don't need to count his income when you apply.

Also, not sure what kind of diapers you're using but I recently discovered that 'White Cloud" diapers at walmart are actually really good and they cost about 3-4 dollars less per package than huggies. Not bad.

Ultimately, I know you love your babies and you will get through this. If your family can't be supportive, that's entirely THEIR loss. Just take care of yourself, be responsible, stick to a budget, and look forward to your new arrival. And remember, many, many women have done this before you, and have perservered just fine.

Answer 5

Actually your situation isn't all that bad. My two children are 1 and 1/2 years apart. I was very tired when they were little, but they grew up so close to each other and they are great playmates even though they are girl and boy. They love each other very much. It was nice because I did all the little kids stuff at once. Get yourself a good double stroller, and a baby sling for when the second one comes so you can be hands free. It will be fine, you'll see. By the way, I did it alone, my x husband left when they were 1 and 2 but was actually semi gone for a lot longer than that. If I can do it, you can do it. In a few years you'll see how wonderful it is to have them close in age. Now I'm pregnant again after 10 years and I have to go BACK and do it all again. I defintily think closer is easier and the right choice. Good Luck. Feel free to email me if you ever need advice or to vent (I promise I won;t talk about myself so much.)

Answer 6

I so understand. Not that I have been in your shoes exactly but we are soooo tight on money and when I got pregnant with my now 5 month old son I wanted to be excited and happy but I was just sick with worry. My husband and daughter (8 years old) were so happy and I just felt like an ungrateful kill joy.

I was a single parent for 6 years and had not even completed a full year of marriage. You know it was nice having two incomes for that quick minute. I thought that my family was going to think me irresponsible as money was and is so tight. You know, I was wrong. They rejoiced (in there own way) when they found out.

I wish that I had not stressed so much as it was a waste of time. Yes it will be overwhelming to take care of two children so close in age as it is physically very taxing but you know it is crazy around here with an 8 year old and a baby too.

All in all I was so amazed at how natural it felt when my son was born. Things have a way of working out. If you want to email me you are welcome to. I will be happy to encourage you when ever you need a smile. I really do understand.

Answer 7

i was in that exact frame of time you are in now. my boys are 15 months apart. they are now 3years old and 2 years old. my husband was happy, and i was so scared. i felt i wasnt ready and wasnt sure if i could handle it. but as the pregnancy progressed, i felt alittle better about it and was making plans to ensure that things would be ok. first thing, everytime we had extra cash, even if it was 5 bucks, put it back in a piggy bank, or somewhere safe. do this each week with whatever amount you can. income tax is coming up too. take a little from that, and put back as baby funds. you'll surely have a baby shower, so dont buy anything until you have one. anyways, it not going to be the easiest thing trust me. people say at least they will be close together. dont listen to them, it is great, but its hard sometimes. the best thing you can do, is set up a routine for the child you have now, that will best fit you after you have the baby. plan everything around the waking up every 3 hours. like if the child now gets up around 7am, when your baby is born try to munipulate feeds around that time, like 6am baby feeding, baby goes back to sleep and you still have time to hang out with the other child to eat breakfast and watch a little tv or what not. it did work with me. i had a good routine that helped me deal with both kids at their time, without getting in the way. but make a routine that will go with how you do things, and get started making it soon, and try to see how it works before your baby is born. its hard sometimes to deal with both of now that they are running around. but i love them and it worth it now. so just be calm. everything will work out. my kids are 15months apart. and i am doing pretty good now. just make you a routine, and save a little each week, no matter how much it is. and if someone puts you down, tell them its your life and they can bark up someone elses tree cuz you dont want to hear it. this wont be easy, but if i of all people can do it, i promise that you can. i have an attention spand of a 3 year old sometimes, so i know you can do this. just remember to breath when you get so tires and annoyed... good luck

Answer 8

♥ Calm down and breathe! :P Ok.. feel a little better? Dont doubt your confidence as a mother. You will be fine! It will be hard to care for two children under the age of 18 months, but with the love & support of your boyfriend and family you will be fine. Dont worry about what your family thinks... after all you are the mother of these children not them. Simply smile! A baby is a blessing! Good Luck! And congratulations!

Answer 9

First of if you BF is excited then forget how everyone else will react. it only effect yours and his life. About money is anyone really set for a kid except for the rich my own mom told me if I wait till I am fully set with money I may never have a kid. As for haveing a newbe and a 1 1/2 you can do it, its tough but it can be done my mom had me and and my brother 11 months apart and my husband and his brother are 10 months apart. the best invention is the play pens that you can put the kid in and they cant get out. there maybe a slight jelousy between the kids but just remember when the baby comes to make sure you give extra attention to the old kid. GL

Answer 10

my daughter has a 4 year old, a one year old, and now a 23 day old. she is having a few problems. at first the one year old thought that the new baby was a doll. so they gave her a doll that looks like her sis. daughter is breast feeding and this gave her a problem with one year old. so she got a breast pump. she has a play pen and a bassinet to put newborn in while she takes care of things in the house and play with the other kids. then she has me. i hope that this might help in calming your fears. where there is a will there is a way.