I'm a pilot and regularly fly between Vancouver and Tokyo. I live in both countries and feel at home in both. I'm a native English speaker, but also speak Japanese.
I previously lived in Japan for a few years.
I'm now married to a woman I love in Tokyo. I have no problems with this relationship. It goes very well. We really suit each other.
When I'm in Vancouver, I'm also at home. I spend half my time here. There is a woman I truly adore and she likes me too. She's O.K. with me being away flying all the time. She actually enjoys the lifestyle. We're thinking of getting married.
Canada doesn't recognize a marriage unless it's registered in Canada, and mine with my Japanese wife isn't. It's only registered in Japan.
Same with Japan. If I was married in Canada, there's no way that the government would know unless I told them, which of course I wouldn't.
It sounds funny, but I'm a very loyal man. I just spend half my time here, half there. Ideas?
2007-11-28 01:53:47 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No. They don't know about each other. "Out of sight, out of mind." I don't want to burden either woman with the thoughts of someone else out there. Believe me, it is working VERY smoothly as is. Both women love the space they have while I'm away, and love being with me while home. I'm happier than I've ever been, and want to formalize that by getting married to my beautiful lady in Vancouver.
2007-11-28 02:06:59 · update #1
Actually, you are dead wrong. There are LOTS of ways for BOTH governments to find out. You forget. This isn't 1950. Technology has connected the world. Japan has records of your marriage, and Canada would, too. And you are wrong about Canada not "recognizing" a marriage that is not registered there. That is simply not true. Eventually the legal hounds would catch up to you, and not only would you end up with two divorces to go with your two marriages, you could end up in jail or paying a hefty fine. Hardly seems worth it, don't you think? If you don't believe me, talk to an attorney about it.
2007-11-28 01:59:26 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. Taco 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Umm -- I think your legal interpretation of how a marriage is recognized is wrong. Canada recognizes marriage from any other country, as long as the marriage was conducted properly under the laws of that country. Same for Japan.
What you are proposing is bigamy, and it's illegal -- which is why you are more worried about the legalities of "recognized marriages", etc., instead of the moral issue of lying to two women that you profess to love. You'd have to lie in Canada when they ask you on the marriage license if you are currently married.
2007-11-28 10:02:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Come on, deep down what does your heart tell you what is the right and wrong and the right thing to do? Is it okay to have 2 wife's that are not aware of what is going on. Morally you are committed to your first wife regardless of what your excuse is. If you want to explain this in any other way you are deceiving yourself and also deceiving the people you are playing with. My opinion is that you should remain faithful to your first wife and give her all your love and devotion and nothing less, otherwise you are a cheater in anyway you want to justify it or look at.
2007-11-28 10:12:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a moral issue in my opinion, more than a legal one...although that is an issue also. Do they both know about each other? I think that is the biggest thing, also how can you deal with that...I don't think I could. Why don't you fly one around with you...that may be a better and more comfortable situation.
Additionally - it is going to virtually impossible to avoid one of them not wanting to go with you either to Japan or Canada...that is going to stress you unbelievably....and also your wives...I think you are kidding us or yourself...this idea will never work.
2007-11-28 09:58:35 · answer #4 · answered by Rein 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
One man one wife. That is the way it is supposed to be. If the two women do not know about the other then you are not any different then any other cheating man. Get a clue both women will find out eventually and so will the government don'tbe fooled about that.
2007-11-28 10:08:22 · answer #5 · answered by zyah77 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have got to be kidding. Are you going to tell your Japanese wife about this other woman or are you just looking for a way to ease your conscience because you're cheating. A wife is a wife, not a dog, it doesn't matter if it's registered or not. Married is married, and I'm pretty sure your current wife and this new woman will agree.
2007-11-28 09:58:33 · answer #6 · answered by Deanrijo 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be wrong to be married to two different women even though you care deeply for each. If one of them really cares for you, then they will be more than happy to travel with you and that would be a real marriage. Legally and morally it just seems wrong and a bit bazaar.
2007-11-28 11:09:31 · answer #7 · answered by ivyheatherclover 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't sound as if you deserve either woman, but if both of them agree with the situation ( and by that I mean they know about the other woman and are OK with it) then I don't see any reason why you shouldn't marry a woman you love.
2007-11-28 09:59:45 · answer #8 · answered by DEBBY'S BABY 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
As so many people do, you are confusing what is legal with what is moral. Just because you can probably get away with something legally does not make it morally right. At this point, though, it appears to make no practical difference -- you are already cheating on your wife.
2007-11-28 10:01:01 · answer #9 · answered by Happy-2 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dude,If you are a loyal man then don't ask a second marriage first.Any way if want to cheat you first wife marry a second one else dont marry.
2007-11-28 10:34:58 · answer #10 · answered by kaada b 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋