The relationship is a lot stronger when the man loves his wife and she obeys him? My church says it is.?

Question

My church says it is and it makes so much sense.

Answer 1

That is what is wrong with religion...

I would never expect my wife to "Obey" me.

We do everything as a team, we make decisions together and we love each other and are stronger because we don't believe one has to be subservient to the other.

Good Luck

Answer 2

Please try to understand that your church is a group dominated by men for men. There are refererences to male domination in marriage in the Bible. That book was written 2000 years ago and there was a whole different set of social mores at work.
In this millemium, the attitude that you should "obey" is more than a bit antiquated.
A marriage is about the blending of two personalities into one cohesive pairing. It is NOT about one being dominant.
To promote the view that men should be dominant is about power and control NOT about marriage.

The attitude you think makes so much sense comes from a day when divorce was not available. That was also from a time when fathers were required to pay a dowry to a man to get their daughters out of their house. It was also a time where women were little more than brood mares for sons.
The time allowed men to beat their wives without repercussion because they did not "obey" or put out at a husbands insistance. The marriage certifictes were little more than a statement of chattel ownership.
Is this the type of marriage you want? The church will be happy to tell you the abusive husbands do not love thier partners. I'm here to tell you that in 2007 a man who believes his wife must obey cannot love anyone much less God and his wife.

Answer 3

I think that it is OK if both husband and wife feel the same way. I don't expect my wife to obey me because I am not always right and I don't want the responsibility of making all the decisions for her. We are equals in my opinion. I belong to a church also but it doesn't teach anything about a woman obeying a husband unless that is what both expect and want in a relationship. The part I agree with is that I do love my wife and she loves me too.

Answer 4

Time to move on. Do not be unevenly yoked. If she doesn't get it, sorry. Pastor dude is not good and has demons of his own. When the Lord prunes our branches, it is painful but necessary. If you don't listen to the Holy Spirit, it will only get worse. Trust me. I ignored Him for 4 years because I thought I was doing the correct "Christian thing." In a sense, I guess it was. I learned a lot about me and the Lord. I had to go through that to get to where I am now. But now that I know, I will not make the same mistake again. If I did, then I would not have learned from the past and I see that as a sin against the Lord. He labored long and hard with and for me. He has a vested interest in me on so many levels. The least I can do is hear Him. Many blessings.

Answer 5

My life is better when my dog obeys me - but he is a mindless animal. A wife is a human being that is capable of higher thought - and therefore should not blindly "obey" the whim of anyone....including her church and her husband.

This is the problem with religion - it fails people because it over simplifies complex problems. A relationship is give and take, and equality. The only one happy in a relationship where the wife 'obeys' the man is the man, and the only reason these relationships last is because the woman is mentally abused in to believing she can't leave.

Answer 6

Obeying is not the objective, to love and obey at the same time is what counts. And the man also who knows that the wife is obeying him because she loves him makes it into a deeper relationship. That means that the man should be ready to meet the needs of his spouse in a selfless sacrificial way.

Answer 7

Nothing against the church, but what helps in a relationship is love, trust and communication, and faith in your marriage and in your relationship.

And the more you talk and the more you communicate with eachother, then you are building up a wonderful foundation for your relationship.

I think the word "obey" I have to disagree with, I think everything is 50/50 in a relationship.

Sure, when I got married, I got married in a church and I said the word obey, but my husband and I both knew that it takes more than the word "obey" to have a strong marriage, and that everyone is different.

When I said "obey" when I was saying my vows, my husband and I both smiled :) !!!!!!

Answer 8

She does what she thinks makes me happy, i guess thats how she shows that she loves me back.

But like a lot have already said, there is no need to "Obey" us, in my case, I've been a lawyer doing all sorts of things, closing cases, explaining truth and fact, but if anything, I'm the one who "Obeys" my wife because for some reason, she still makes the best decisions.

Answer 9

I'm sure it does if that's all you know. But that's not how alot of the rest of the world lives their lives and they do perfectly well. In my world, Domination and submission is accepted by either men or women, and many of my friends are Dominant over their husbands or b/f's and the men obey them. Because they want to. Its all about consent, when its not consensual, its abuse. I think you need to live alittle more life to really understand if this is what you want in your life. You may be saying that it makes sense to you, but you've asked questions here that indicate you are not so sure. Its a big world out here, you might want to spend some time exploring it to find out if you are the person someone else has told you to be.

Answer 10

Husbands Love your wives as Christ loves the church. Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands.

Ok, so this means that husbands are supposed to love their wife as Christ loved the church. Christ loved the church so much, that he died for it!
Wives are supposed to submit to their OWN husbands. Look up submission in your dictionary. Here is a few Definitions:
1 a: a legal agreement to submit to the decision of arbitrators b: an act of submitting something (as for consideration or inspection); also : something submitted (as a manuscript)
2: the condition of being submissive, humble, or compliant
3: an act of submitting to the authority or control of another

Submission doesn't mean obedience!

The Bible doesn't tell wives to obey their husbands. It tells children to obey their parents!
One more point and I'll be done. Submit to husbands, it doesn't say submit to all men!
Ok. Enough said.

Answer 11

Little Angel you are funny and you have a great imagination making up these questions. It is better if a woman obeys her man. Look at the animal kingdom rarely does the female give the orders.