raped and hesitant?

Question

okso i was (in my definition) raped...and though i dont blame other guys for that one's evilness... how can i ever trust them again?

my definition is that he knew i wanted to stop yet didnt and made it impossible for me to escape the situation. i had said stop, but he was my boyfriend, so some ppl dont think its actually rape, but i feel like it was

Answer 1

Let me make this clear. THE MOMENT YOU SAID STOP AND HE DIDN'T IS WHEN IT BECAME RAPE. THAT IS THE DEFINITION OF RAPE. NO MEANS NO. STOP MEANS STOP. OK IF THIS BOY RAPED YOU GO TALK WITH SOMEONE ( domestic violence investigator) AT YOUR LOCAL SHERIFFS DEPT OF POLICE DEPT AND FILE CHARGES. It does not matter if you didn't report it at the time. You were scared.

After that get some counseling. I'm sure there is free counseling in your area for things like that. You can contact a local shelter or R.A.I.N
Do not be in any hurry to to trust guys again. Don't be in such a rush.

Answer 2

It seems your main issue with what happened is "trust." There are many ways, including rape, that others can betray our trust. In that particular sense, make certain you never put yourself in a situation that you have to rely on the trustworthiness of someone who hasn't yet proved their trustworthiness to you -- and that takes as long as it takes. If they're really trustworthy, they will be willing to earn your respect and trust -- and this is true in any situation whether it's dating or friends or family members or work -- whatever. A trustworthy person is someone who understands and appreciates the value of trust between people and will be looking for the same values in you. Don't worry - we've all been fooled at some time. Try to really get to know the people you associate with and who they associate with, as well -- that can tell you a lot. Try not to give people more credit than they deserve. Look for consistency in their behavior and how they do or don't respect others. Don't be afraid to see people's true faces just because you want them to be something that they're not. It's a jungle out there -- learn some survival skills. Good luck!

Answer 3

It was rape, and an act of violence...

Please, do not see this person anymore, for your own emotional well-being.... also talk with someone.. a therapist, a counselor... you need and deserve help, and to understand it was not your fault! It was HIS fault.

I'd also report this to the police... even if they cant' do anything now, it will be on his record and you may be protecting someone else's future.

There are many websites out there about surviving rape, victims of rape... you can do a yahoo search to find them... i hope you do.

Answer 4

You need ot get to the police and pres charges on the one/s you think are responsible. What do you mean by rape here? Talk to the police and let them know what happenned. At least get he ones responsible for an assult or harrasment charge.

Answer 5

did you get therapy? there are whole bunches of emotions and stages you have to go through to arrive out the other side of this...agree with first respondent, stay safe and if you are young, just don't go out alone with "boyfriends" unless you know them real well. Date rape is common as mud, but tends to happen more with young people (teens).

Answer 6

Make sure you are always in a safe environment when you with a guy.

Until you find someone who is sensitive, caring and maybe someone who you can tell what happened to you.

Stay away from guys who push you to have sex, before you are ready.

Answer 7

Be careful. Don't put yourself into situations where men are looking at you like candy - wear decent clothing that covers all your bases and only try to meet men in a "safe" environment (church...poetry club, etc.) Get counselling.

Answer 8

In your definition... guess we would have to know what your definition was for a proper answer to this question.

Answer 9

You need to be a bit more specific. Your definition????