I'm 15 and 1 month pregnant. I told my parents today and they freaked out.I told them my plan to adopt the child and they said I have to get a abortion! this is the worst day of my life. I am scared being pregnanat but also excited, when the babys going to kick and I can hold it. Yesterday I even (selfishly) thought about keeping it. It breaks my heart that they want me to kill their grandchild. Is there anything I can do to stop them?
2007-11-27 14:29:20 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I commend you for recognizing that, even though this child didn't come at the time you wanted it to, that children are a blessing from God and should not be aborted. There are 2 million couples out there waiting to adopt a child; though it might not be the best time for you to have a baby, it might be the perfect time for someone else who cannot have children to adopt your child. It breaks my heart, as well, that your parents are willing to kill an innocent baby.
Parents of pregnant teenagers cannot force them into having an abortion. Forcing a minor to have an abortion is legally construed as child abuse. If you tell a doctor that you are being forced by your parents to go through with this abortion, the doctor will not carry out the abortion.
The only exception to this rule is if the pregnant teen’s life is in danger due to a medical emergency. In such a case, the teen’s parents have the right to permit an abortion against the teenager’s wishes.
Good luck and congratulations!
2007-11-27 14:46:06 · answer #1 · answered by Squeegee Beckingheim :-) 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Girl, there's NO WAY I would get an abortion. They cannot force you to do so. The doctor WILL NOT do it without your consent & I would absolutely refuse. It's a great idea to adopt your child out. Yes, it's not the most responsible thing you could have done to get pg but at least now you're thinking about the baby & what you need to do to give it the best life possible. DON'T get an abortion if it's not what you want. There are tons of perfect couples out there ready to adopt. Just make sure you take all the steps to find a credible agency & make sure that you're comfortable with the family. Maybe you can even have a part in the kids life, ya know? Do what's best for your child, in my opinion that would be adoption.
Good luck hun, and if you need to talk you can email me anytime!
((((((HUGS))))))
2007-11-28 01:04:55 · answer #2 · answered by buckshotbullies 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Your parents CANNOT make you abort your child. Forced abortion is illegal in America. Please go to a crisis pregnancy center as soon as possible and talk to the counselors there. They will be able to help. You can find one in your area by calling 1-800-395-HELP or visiting:
http://www.optionline.org
All of their services are totally free and confidential. They can provide you with a safe place to stay if necessary and give you referrals for financial, medical, and legal assistance. They can also talk to you about adoption (and keep in mind, if you do decide to place your child for adoption, many adoptive families are willing to pay for all your medical bills).
Just one week after you miss your period, your baby's heart is already beating. Please take a look at this information:
Support for Pregnant Teens:
http://standupgirl.com/site/index.php
Photos and Video of Abortions, Including 1st Trimester Abortions:
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-4-video.html
http://www.cbrinfo.org/Resources/pictures.html
Photos and Facts About Baby's Development:
http://www.justthefacts.org/clar.asp
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-2-prenatal.html
Abortion Stories:
http://abortiontv.com/Words/truestoriesfrom-mothers.htm
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-G-2-testimony.html
http://www.teenbreaks.com/abortion/girlswhoaborted.cfm
Abortion Risks:
http://www.teenbreaks.com/abortion/complicationsgirls.cfm
http://afterabortion.info/complic.html
http://www.abortionfacts.com/reardon/effect_of_abortion.asp
http://www.bcpinstitute.org/brochure.htm
Abortion Deaths:
http://www.lifedynamics.com/Pro-life_Group/Pro-choice_Women
http://www.afterabortion.info/news/abortiondeaths.html
http://www.lifeissues.org/ru486/deaths.htm
When you talk to your parents, try to be calm and respectful but firm. Let them know that while you are sorry for disappointing them, you want to do the right thing now. Tell them that abortion will hurt you physically and emotionally, and kill their grandchild as well. Tell them that you are not willing to consent to it. Ask them to go to the crisis pregnancy center with you so that you can all work together to make a plan for dealing with this. Act like an adult, so that they will be more likely to treat you like an adult.
Do NOT let your parents drive you to the abortion clinic. If they do, jump out of the car, run away, yell, "Somebody call the police!" This is no time to be worry about what people think. If the police are called, explain that your parents are attempting to force you into an abortion that you do NOT want. Be like a momma bear and protect that baby. If you are somehow tricked into going to the abortion clinic, just WALK OUT. Refuse to sign any paperwork. Refuse to go back into the clinic with their staff. I've known of cases in which women were sedated against their will. Don't let this happen to you.
STAY STRONG--your baby is depending on you.
2007-11-29 05:06:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go to your local birthright, your school counsler or online and get as much info as you can about the risks and benefits of both abortion and adoption. I was adopted by my grandparents because my Mom was only 14 when I was born, and I am so grateful that she didn't have an abortion. When you show them that you have taken the time to research both options, they may have a change of heart. There are even couples that will pay the expenses associated with pregnancy in exchange for adopting your child (not sure if it's legal in all states, but I've seen ads in newspapers for that). I think it's great that you are considering adoption because there are so many couples that aren't able to have children on their own. Also, abortion can come back to haunt you later by causing severe depression and nightmares, as well as physical consenquenses such as possible infertility.
2007-11-27 14:37:12 · answer #4 · answered by apsuz73 3 · 9⤊ 0⤋
There is are many weeks before you would even "feel" the baby. Wait until you all calm down, and the shock of your pregnancy dissipates. Then try to talk about your options with your parents. If they won't help, try Planned Parenthood.
At 33 years old having a baby, and being married is one of the most difficult things of my life. I own a business and take care of my mother...so at 15 you could imagine really how hard it is.
Babies are far more than cute and cuddly, they require you to wake up 3-6 times a night and feed them for 15-45 minutes. They require a LOT of money, to pay for diapers (up to 10 a day) and they grow out of their clothes very quickly. My son is 8 months old and he is out growing 12 month old clothes, and he is an easy child. Sometime babies get Colic and cry constantly. You would not be able to go to school, and day care can cost up to 1000 month. Think about everything. Consider all of your options and do your research. Without a high school diploma your chances of earning more than minimum wage are very low. Plus being a single parent is ridiculously hard if you don't have the support of your family.
Adopting out your child is a great option, if you are emotionally able to do this. At 15 years old your body isn't even done growing yet. You ~ as much as you don't want to hear this ~ are still a kid, with soooo much life ahead of you!
2007-11-27 14:46:46 · answer #5 · answered by Pierce's Mom 1 · 2⤊ 2⤋
don't think your being selfish at all by wanting to keep YOUR baby! your parents are being the selfish ones and telling you to get an abortion that is very wrong of them and to tell ya the truth i would never ever forgive my parents if they would have ever said that to me....right now i want to you grab a phone book and call a local church if you don't already have one you go to....tell them your story and say you want to keep your baby but need help NOW they will help you get a place to stay and money to raise and keep your baby trust me!! and alot of family will help you w/ adoptions if you want too
also try your school nurse she will help you do what you need if your not comfortable talking to a pastor or someone from the church
your parents have no right telling you that even if your at the clinic and you tell the abortion Dr. no he can't touch you!
good luck! we are all here if you want to talk or vent more about this subject you can send me an email
but don't listen to your parents!
2007-11-27 15:47:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Guys, guys, guys- for all these people who are telling this girl that her parents can't force her to have an abortion, you ARE WRONG !!! NOT ONLY CAN THEY FORCE HER TO DO THIS, IT'S VERY LIKELY THAT THEY WILL!!!!! All this talk about how doctors won't perform an abortion on a girl this age without her consent is nonsense, because this girl IS NOT OLD ENOUGH TO GIVE HER CONSENT, TO EITHER AN ABORTION, OR TO THE SEX THAT PRECEEDED IT !!!! 16 is the MINIMUM AGE for consent for SEX in most states, and to legally give consent for medical treatment of ANY TYPE, INCLUDING ABORTIONS, one MUST BE 18 !! This kid is a LONG, LONG, WAY from that !!! THAT'S THE LAW IN ALL 50 STATES !!! In the eyes of the law, because you, the asker, are a minor ( anyone under age 18 is a minor in all 50 states) your parents can legally force you to do anything they want you to do, with or without your consent, if they deem it to be in your best interest. It sounds as though they have made up their minds, and all the kicking and screaming in the world is not going to change anything. Apart from that, you are in NO WAY ready to be a parent- you haven't even finished high school yet, and if you continue with this pregnancy, you can forget about not only that, but about going to college as well, which will totally wreck any chance you have of having a decent life and career. I'm sure your parents are thinking the same thing I am- that you were very foolish and inmature to get yourself into this situation in the first place, and they want to make sure that you get out of it before it totally ruins your life !!! Your parents don't want to support you for the rest of your ( and their) lives, sweetie- they need and deserve a break, and I am sure you have brothers or sisters who are going to need help getting started with their own adult lives. What kind of example have you set for your younger siblings? Not a good one, that is for sure. Getting pregnant at your age was a very dumb thing to do- and no, it is not a sign that you are grown up. It's a sign that you still have a LOT of growing up to do, in fact.
Your parents sound as though they are decent people- they just don't want to see you wreck your life, which you will if you try to keep this baby. As for adoption, that is a good alternative, provided that you can get the adoptive parents to pay your medical and living expenses, and the delivery expenses at the hospital when the baby is born. If they won't or can't do this, then I don't blame your parents if they don't want to support you. My sister got pregnant in high school, and my mother threw her out of the house when she learned about it. In your shoes, I would just be grateful that my parents didn't do the same thing to me. You should have thought about what would happen if you got pregnant before you had unprotected sex. Had you done this, it might have made you think twice before going ahead with it.
One other thing before I end- IGNORE all that nonsense from the Right to lifers about how abortions supposedly cause breast or cervical cancer in later life. THAT IS NOT TRUE, it's just a scare tactic they put out to try to force people into sharing their viewpoints. There has NEVER been a proven medical link between abortion and breast cancer, and it's also well documented now that the only women who get cervical cancer are those who first contract the human pampilloma virus, or HPV, during sex. HPV causes genital warts, and these can become cancerous in later life, yes, but this has NOTHING TO DO WITH ABORTION. Post abortion syndrome has NEVER BEEN recognized by the American Psychiatric Association as a disorder, so ignore that too- most of that is nonsense as well.
I'm sorry you have to go through such a trauma at your age, but this is lesson for you which you won't forget- and it may make you think twice about having unprotected sex in the future, which is all to the good. Enough said.
2007-11-28 09:33:40 · answer #7 · answered by Starlight 1 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
They cannot force you to have an abortion. They will not give you one if they know you don't want it. You need some help from another adult that would intervene with your parents on your behalf. Do you have anyone? Friend, family, teacher, anyone? Does the father know? What about his parents? If they do not I would tell them. Talk to someone soon and get them to help you. Good luck dear.
2007-11-27 16:21:40 · answer #8 · answered by kim h 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well 1st off NOONE can MAKE you get an abortion but YOURSELF!! so if YOU Dont want to, DONT!! Im so thankful that you dont want to do that! I cant even stand to THINK ABORTION!!!! THANKYOU!!! :) The adoption thing would be a GREAT IDEA! and if you feel you are responsible enough & able to CARE for YOUR OWN child, KEEP IT! My mother had me at 14 yrs old!!! she did it, with parents help! but your parents aughta respect you, and your decisions! a child isnt just something you can kill & get on with your life ya know??? you will live with that decision for the rest of your life! Just follow your heart! keep the abortion thought in the back of your mind, but also if you feel like keeping it once you get further along & feel that STRONG BOND that all of us Mommies do, KEEP IT! its YOUR CHILD! you can get help from the state! just please dont listen to them & abort it! :) Follow your heart! & congrats as long as your happy about it! :)
2007-11-27 14:38:53 · answer #9 · answered by Addison's Mommy 2 · 9⤊ 0⤋
They can't force u to have an abortion U are pretty young though but it's not right for them to have u have an abortion. Talk to them i guess and hopefullu that might work
2007-11-27 15:43:55 · answer #10 · answered by sweetie 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋