i have no problem being myself and being comfortable with my family ...but when i'm with my family i don't live with like cousins, aunts, etc., church people, or at school, i get so shy and quiet. i have been through verbal bullying for lots of years, and the bullies are at my school, but i barely see them. i'm a freshman in hs. ppl that like me tried to fix my shy, quiet problem for a long time, they gave up and it never worked. i just...can't express myself =( i lost hope in myself. i rly want to be comfortable and everything...then my life would change so much for the better. i feel like my life is nothing. i keep telling myself, come on, talk, be yourself, be calm, but i never have the strength.
2007-11-27 12:57:15 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
One thing you can do is to practice visualization. Do some deep breathing, then close your eyes and picture yourself behaving more like the way you want to be. Then when you are in situations, try to be that way (even just a little bit).
Also, you can try using affirmations. Every time you have a negative thought about yourself, try to say "STOP!" in your head and immediately think something positive (whether you believe it or not).
You can also try getting some self-help books. There is a section in every bookstore that is called "self-help." Reading some of those books can help you to see things in a new way.
Getting involved in things you enjoy can help you have more confidence and help you be more comfortable with people, too. Being around new people that share your same interests can make you feel secure enough to try being more open.
Exercise can help, too. It can help you feel more relaxed and also it gives you confidence and endorphins. It's not about just how you look, but just the feeling that exercise can give you. Try out some exercise videos or DVDs to see what you like, or do any sport you like more often.
I hope you feel better soon!
2007-11-27 13:36:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try breaking free of this a little at a time. Try joining a drama class it may help you, or do other activities that put you in situations that you have to communicate.You are not confident because you have been bullied, you must overcome this.
Realize that people who bullied you are weaklings deep down.figure out ways to become strong and confident without bullieng people yourself.
2007-11-27 21:46:58 · answer #2 · answered by J's leather emporium 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SG, you are wonderful and strong and beautiful and you have to believe in yourself, give yourself the time you need to just grow up and change and mature, etc.
It all takes time and life experience and high school is the WORST for many, many people; find a friend or someone who you can talk to & don't convince yourself that you have to be better than you are or better than anyone in your family
2007-11-27 21:07:00 · answer #3 · answered by yyyyyy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was shy myself, yet I am still shy. I have learned to be more outgoing. There are plenty of people that were shy during their youth that have grown up to be extroverted. There is hope for you. Perhaps, you can try acting or joining a club so you can meet people. Try sitting in front of the class, not in the back. Hang in there, for there is brightness in your future.
2007-11-27 21:19:34 · answer #4 · answered by aramos170 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I used to be a little shy, but I really came into my own in high school. I can't say exactly what happened, but I changed. One thing that worked for me was to either start or get in a conversation about something I really liked. It was a start.
2007-11-27 21:07:29 · answer #5 · answered by Dane Cruz 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You express yourself so eloquently in writing. You have to develop your self -confidence. Try practicing in front of your mirror and practice self affirmations like " I am like-able, assured and self-confident young woman."
2007-11-27 21:13:43 · answer #6 · answered by laura C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
have any sports/hobbies/groups you can get into at school? it can help to be around people w/ common interests, and may help you relax.
2007-11-27 21:08:05 · answer #7 · answered by _helperton 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well you said it there you aren't confident in yourself
once you gain confidence then you will be more social and vocal
2007-11-27 21:07:24 · answer #8 · answered by day Dreamer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋