Guidance may be needed here?

Question

I've been confused big time. About 2 people, and also mainly about myself.

One girl I really, really developed very strong feelings for has disappeared, and I feel guilty because I can feel my feelings slowly disappearing too. Although I'm also slightly comforted by that cos a relationship would have been a bad idea, verging on plain wrong.

But someone else is confusing me even more, because I'm really not sure what my OWN intentions are. In a physical sense, I think I'd be mad NOT to pursue a relationship. Add to that the fact that I seem to be thinking about her constantly. But all of my trying to figure out all this stuff leads me to the conclusion that I only want friendship, but I can't find any reason why that is.

Going on what sort of things I like in a girl, I've found absolutely no turn-offs whatsoever, yet I just can't seem to see her in anything other than a friendly capacity, despite the fact that I always flirt outrageously with her.

Someone please figure me out.

Answer 1

It's the magic that is lacking, and if you have it, it is hard to lose, and if it isn't there, you might as well forget it, you will be friends only as long as there is no magic.

Which is not to say that the magic can't develop later. But as long as it isn't there, it isn't there, and magic will not be forced.

That is why.

You are impatient my friend. Some things can't be rushed. I don't sense magic happening with this person. Not right now. Wait, something better is coming. :D

Blessings,
Lady Morgana )0(

Answer 2

If I could offer some advice, I suggest you should just enjoy yourself and not try and think it out too much. By trying to 'figure' it out you often kill your own emotions. By going out and trying to experience life you discover things about yourself. Whether it be good or bad. You are confused because you are trying to use your intellect and suppress your heart. A relationship is all about the heart. To make a lasting relationship you must find your own happiness and then share that with your partner who hopefully have found her own happiness also and is willing to share that with you.
One thing you got going for you is that you seem to be willing to share and not be selfish. That is why 'cheating' behind someone back is not a good idea since that is all about being selfish. If you are going to be doing that (for whatever reason) then you should expect your partner to do the same also. To further add to your ego (LOL) you stated that you have a friendly relationship with this one girl? Well I believe that that is the first requirement for a lasting relationship. You will discover in time that love is much more deeper and long term.

Thanks for your question

Answer 3

Retro my friend, sometimes our subconscious just wants to have a friend and confidant. Even if it's with someone that we'd otherwise enjoy having as a mate. Perhaps your inner spirit is telling you that way down deep you already know something that you haven't picked up on consciously yet. It IS OK to just have a good, cl;ose friend you know. There's NO such thing as having too many friends, only having ONE enemy is having too many of those. So, just enjoy your friendship, if anything progresses from there, then just let it happen in its OWN good time, all by itself.

Brightest Blessings,
Raji the Green Witch

Answer 4

Aaar Jim lad thereby hangs a tail or a tale.
Sounds pretty much like post adolescent unnattached male syndrome to me (imho) don't worry it is a common complaintwhen the urge gets unbearable move in with the handiest compliant female, and you should hopefully lose your confusion, being too busy trying to accommodate all her social commitments. Let alone that sharing with a female means that she tends to regard your wallet as her property.
All I can do is wish you good luck with it all.
One alternative plan is to drink yourself into oblivion. This is claimed to work but nevertheless few therapists reccomend it!

Answer 5

If you wanted a relationship, you would know about it. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be friends with someone, and sometimes, feelings can develop over time, but don't force it just for the sake of it.