what would you do about your mother if she has kicked you out 6 six times out the house?

Question

My mother and I did not have a good relationship for the past four years. I have been in and out of her house for almost this six times. I went on my way to put myself through school, survived through homelessness, jobless, four car wreck and severe panick attack. Now am burnt out and I do not have any energy anymore. I want peace of my mind. I went to a car wreck yesterday and totaled my car. I have no car or home so far. The only thing that I do is my school which I have two more semesters left to graduate and get my bachalors. Luckly I have a car insurance and I can get a car. I still have my job. My mind is tired. I want peace. I want to get my own place. Luckly I have good friends who are there for me when I need them. My question is that would you call someone who has kicked you out of her house and even when she wants you back to the house. Would you have even if you had no car to go to work, or school? what would you do if you were me? Where would you start? I feel like I have

I feel like I have no control over my life lately. I just feel confused, and lost. I do not have a clue what am going to do but I need to make a good decision. what would you do if you were me???????

Answer 1

i would turn to my friends that are there for me for now. take some time in the next week or so, go visit with mom, just talk, dont bring up moving back in, dont talk about how bad things are and see where she steers the conversations. go from there. it might work better for both of you that way, and ya might be back home and happy soon without asking. you are this close to finishing school, give it a shot, it is worth!

Answer 2

I am 29 years old,
I really love this web site because I had so many questions like this 10 years ago! I can tell you this, I never got along with my parent when I was younger in High school and college! I got kicked out weekly, and I crashed there car's not mine. But at the end of the day, those friend of yours are only going to extent that helping hand for so long. The people that are really there for you when it count is our family! I don't know if this makes any sense to you now but I wish someone had given me this advice when I was younger.

I know that its a real blow to your ego to crawl back to your parents and ask for help, but that the first step to really becoming a man. Being able to admit that you were wrong and that you messed you in the hardest thing in the world!

Take a leap of faith and go home, it sound like you have some issues that you need to work out with your family. Once you have there is no better feeling in the world that having a great relationship with the people that care the most about you, your FAMILY!

Answer 3

First off I would really take a deep look (honestly) at yourself to see if there was anything that you did any or ALL of the times you were "kicked" out.

All parents love their children, but some are not very good at showing it. If there was a lot of drama and emotional turmoil wen you two were trying to live there, that may Have caused her to rather you live else where, either for your own good, for her own sanity or to preserve the relationship between you so it did not get worse.

If you are both open to the idea of counseling I would recommend that for sure. It seems that you two have a poor ability to communicate as you have no idea if you can trust your own mother and seem to express no understanding as to why she kicked you out.

If you all can build on your relationship.... then I would say you could then consider moving back in. But not until you can be certain this is a healthy choice and not just another short term rocky decision.

Good luck.... and remember, No matter how much our family members irritate us, we will still miss them when they are gone!

Answer 4

First of all, concentrate on your work and finishing school successfully. Put everything else out of your mind. No sense screwing that up right now with everything else that's gone wrong for you. The past is the past. Let it go. Hard to do, but possible. Concentrating on your work will help. Make that your only task to concentrate on until it's completed. You also have to realize, that if your mother treated you badly, it's because she has severe problems of her own that she can't handle and takes it out on you, even if that's unfair, that's how it goes with some people. What you need to do, and this is the tough one because i know from personal experience how denial of a mother's love can hurt and totally eff you up, but you need to forgive your mother for the pain she's caused you because she wasn't doing it to hurt you, but just because she was not in control of herself and in so much pain she didn't think how her lack of control would hurt her own child. She's your mother, for f--k sake. The only one you'll ever have. Forgive her and love her and after you're done with school, maybe you'll have been able to get that into your heart enough to go and tell her that yourself. If nothing else, you'll have a clear conscience and a peaceful heart knowing you did what was right.

Answer 5

Thank your mom. She sounds just as tired as you do and doesn't know how to fix it. She probably throws you out due to frustration. The best thing is she takes you back, that's love. Do you work or not work, just school? Confusing. As far as transportation, maybe the city transit system will come in handy until you get back on your feet. Maybe with the insurance money you can help your mom as well. You need each other right now. Learn to communicate, love and help each other. She's your mother, who did she complain to when not all went well before the last four years?

Answer 6

Sounds like if you didn't have bad luck you wouldn't have any luck at all! It also sounds like you have your priorities in order. Stick with school and your job. I wouldn't go back to ;your mom's if I were you. Try to stay at a friend's or a hotel. There is a reason she keeps kicking you out, whether it is your fault or hers. You don't need that stress. Write down all the problems that you have. Write down (next to each problem) what it would take to solve that problem. You would be very surprised on how fast you will get them resolved that way. Good luck.

Answer 7

If you are still living at your 'mom's house' then you were never in control of your life. I wonder if there are other issues at play here considering the number of times in and out (alchohol, drugs, bad boyfriends, etc.).

I suggest you realize it's time to become responsible for yourself and your actions. Get your own place or find a roommate or a rent a room if you can afford living on your own.

I appreciate your tenacity and the fact you are still working on your college education. However, it's not up to your mom to support you and yes, just living in her home is supporting you. Your an adult and you need to working on living like one.

Good luck!

Answer 8

in a way you have answered your own questions. right now you need those friends to help you through the rough times in your life. don't stress yourself out further by fruitlessly trying to count on a mother who isn't stable enough to provide the support you need. you need to finish school, get stable yourself, and then you can help the friends who have been there for you.
i don't think you should totally cut of your mother...i mean still respect her as being the woman that gave birth to you.
maybe you need to take a bus or taxi for a while though...

Answer 9

First of all. Go to Burger King and get a job and then go to all the stores and ask for a job and then go to a community college and earn a degree. Get your own place and then make some GREAT friends who would help you if you ever "fell" down

Answer 10

you need to analyze yourself. how much responsibiltiy are you taking about being kicked out? i doubt that your mom wakes up one morning and says "today i dont want you here" for no reason. iam sure if i asked your mom why you kicked her out she will have a response. own up to your mistakes and make your list of priorities

it doesnt sound like your stable so a job might be first on your list, then a apartment, and work on your relationship with mom