What do they mean by "Be Yoursef"?

Question

U know ,,who u r but the a sum of experiences,that are first defined by other people,
So how can u be yourself,if yourself is not truly yours?

Answer 1

You experiences are NOT who you are. Who you are is defined by how you ACT upon your experiences.

[edit] snowskim67's answer illustrates my point beautifully.

LOL, he deleted it!

Answer 2

As for the saying "Be Yourself", What they really want you to do is to fit into their own expectations of what another human should act and feel. If you fall out of the "norm", then they don't want anything to do with you.
As for your question on how you can truly be yourself, being yourself has more involved than just experiences. Those experiences are controlled by others AS WELL as yourself. Your decisions on what to do are your own, the experience that you use to help make a decision, that is merely called upon. It is still up o you on wether or not you will follow those epxeriences or not...

Answer 3

Have you even been to a party and told a lie to make yourself look better than you are? Have you betrayed a friend, then covered it up or kissed up to your friend like it never happened? Have you said Yes, but really meant No? I think all of us put up a false front from time to time. I think when, for instance, a mother tells you to "be yourself" she is thinking of the true self that only she knows, a person with confidence, honesty and sweet smile. She is hoping you bring forth what is good and honest. Yep, moms think like that. Of course, it's not that simple and we will all grow with our personal experiences and sometimes look back and laugh at our earlier selves. We should be motivated by what makes us happy and what joy we can bring to others (my mother talking?). We are all different and evolving. This never stops, it isn't like you turn 40 and you have it all together. Your mind is absorbing information from others and from your surroundings, but this does not mean you adapt to everything you experience. Take the best of it and learn from it. Make your mistakes and grow from them.

Answer 4

A common mistake, particularly in the pursuit of romance, is to misrepresent yourself. We desire relationships so much we offer 'Whatever is wanted' instead of what we actually have. "Be yourself" just means don't lie on your resume. That ultimately, in matters of the heart (or business), honesty is the best policy, particularly if you want a lasting relationship.

As for your second question -

It's a contradiction to say 'Self is not yours unless it is free from the influenced of others' because self IS your reaction to the influences of others.

A knife's sharpness belongs to the knife, but it is defined by what the knife can cut.

Your 'self' is yours, but it is defined (& created) by your experiences with others.

Answer 5

Heh good questions.

I hear what you're saying about self, but consider also that your experiences include things not controlled or exerted by other people.

Nature for example. If you walk through a forest grove, no one individual will experience the exact same falling of the leaves, chirping in the background, aroma from the trees.

Your own mind's workings - because of the difference and random factors of when and where things you experience are taken in and perceived (ie: shorter vision picking up details another individual might miss), your mind will arrange and or discard these pieces in a different way than any other individual.

So, with the individual experiences and assimilative qualities considered, sooner or later one hopefully comes up with some unifying fields within oneself. These fields (in my warped philosophy) become the foundation for self and are composed of our sense of life.

To catch a glimpse as best as possible of our own unifying fields is to catch a glimpse of ourself, of our own personal style.

To thine own self be true is first to get an idea as to who you are, what you like, which behaviours are from within and which are manipulated reactions caused by inducement from others, and finally to take ownership.

It's easy to give up your self, but figuring out who the heck you are, then taking responsibility for your self - that's being true to you.

Answer 6

Very good question. Be yourself or "to thine own self be true". Are the experiences your or others? They are your experiences. No one elses. The reason that it's important to be yourself and not what others want or expect you to be is because or experiences shape who we are. Everyone's experiences are unique to them. This is important to consider when interacting with others. You can't please everyone. That's OK, being comfortable and confident in your own skin as long as you are true to yourself and do not compromise your own set of personal ethics is a healthy choice. Continue to experience learn and grow. Wearing a mask to hide yourself or your experiences is unhealthy for the psyche and will cause dissatisfaction and low self worth.

Take care.

Answer 7

You are a a product of your father and mother and the environment in which you were raised.
So you are not a blank card, therefore you must a have reasoning which directs your responses to ideas, actions and values.
These are honed by those with whom we interact and if we like those reactions we adopt the behavior patterns.
You are not born with full knowledge, children know only what they are told. It is not until we are capable of deductive reasoning that we develop further.
If you like yourself, that is being yourself.

Answer 8

The people around you may err in defining you ~ but u can't mistook what you are. The meaning of Be yourself is that don't be mislead by the erronious definitions of the people around you about you and try to adopt to their understandings. Continue to be your ownslef - not withstanding the definitions given by people around you.

Answer 9

Not being influenced by others. Focussing on oneself is a trait very few possess...It could be categorized as an independent thinker....(always thinking outside the box) Most people emulate others, like children do!

Answer 10

I actually have to piggy back on what someone else said. Your experiences don't make you who you are. How you deal with them when you are faced with them makes you who you are. Everyone, deals with problems different ways. Be yourself, is simply just telling you to deal with it, how you would deal with it. Don't let someone tell you, " Oh you should do this........," or, " You should do that..... When I was faced with that, i dealt it with it like this." Its nice to let people have influence, and be there to help you, but you have to determine your decision.