I'm really starting to love this woman but...?

Question

we can't be together because we have a different religion, I am a roman chatolic and she is an Iglesia ni Cristo... which makes it impossible for us to be lovers... we've been seeing each other for almost a 3 months and I really really like her... should I change faith just to be with her? do you know a similar case that I can relate to... please help...

Answer 1

You can or she can agree to accept the other's religion as the primary religion for the children. For Catholics she does not have to switch faith for you to be married in a Catholic church. Assuming that's what you want. She does need to respect your religion and allow you to raise the children in the catholic faith to marry in a catholic church. She doesn need to complete a canonical investigation, and I belive she still needs a marriage bann posted in her church.

Now, in regards to you switch faith, of course the Catholic church would prefer you keep your faith that you belive in. But, you'll have to decide.

My friend who's a priest (catholic), was upset with his sister because she married a Jewish man. Her family wanted a catholic wedding, the grooms family definetly wanted a jewish wedding. They chose to marry Justice of Peace so they felt like they were not taking sides. However, I think you should fix the issue by choosing, even if others do not approve. Either she chooses to switch or you choose, or you both become "born again". I mean every Christian is " Born Again".

Answer 2

Do you think Jesus knew the difference between roman chatolic and Iglesia ni Cristo?

Being lovers before marriage is a sin in both also.

Answer 3

My officemate and her (ex) bf got similar situation same as you. But only in reverse, the girl's family is devoted catholic and the guy side is also a devoted Iglesia ni Cristo. The guy can adjust to his gf situations because catholic are not that strict. But the girl can't adjust because each member of Iglesia believes that constant attendance in worship services is one of his obligations. So she can't force his bf "to do this" and "to do that" obligations. Since both don't give way to each others belief, sad to say they broke up.

But if you really like the girl and love her, try to accept what she has and what she believes since you're the guy in this situation...:)

Answer 4

You are only starting to love this woman, and now you cite religion as a possible barrier.

My suggestion is to continue going out with her so you will get to know her better, and for you to understand YOUR feelings better. When your heart finally tells you you can't live without her, then you will stop asking the question about religion. She could be a member of the Mormon church, or of Jehovah's Witnesses, or a Buddhist, or practising Islam, and it wouldn't matter. In the end, you follow your heart.

It is a given that members of the Iglesia ni Cristo can not marry outside of their religion. She will be put in a major dilemma just to get married to you, if you do not convert. Would you wish that on your lady love, on one without whom you can't go on living?

My brother, formerly a Catholic like the rest of us in the family, fell in love with someone from the INC. He was madly in love with her. He started going to church with her, feeling his way. Finally, he decided to convert. He has never been happier. We are all supportive of him, and now also of her.

Like I have said, all you need to do is follow your heart.

Answer 5

If I remember correctly Iglesia ni Cristo policy says she can't marry out of her religion. That's because it is a cult. If she wants you to change your religion to marry her, find another woman. Sorry to be so blunt, but I don't want to lie to you. If she is willing to get married in a civil ceremony, go for it.

Answer 6

a lot of cases that you can relate hmmmppp. a non christian marrying a christian and people with different religions marrying because of love. so you only want to be lovers? hmmmppp. hmmmmmpppp. that is illegal! why how faithful are you in your religion hmmm? not faithful enough i say to have an affair with this girl outside marriage? hmmmppp. open your eyes, you've been blinded. hmmmpppp.

Answer 7

You don't need to go to church to be married. Both of my parents were Catholic in the Philippines, but my father was an American while my mother a Filipino. There were some who did not agree with this, so my parents got married using a judge. 3 months later they had their church wedding, but it was a formality, as far as the law was concerned they were already married.

Answer 8

Who cares about religion!!! If u love her be with her....my boy is catholic and I'm christian whichi doesnt make too much of a diff but we love each other and he's a filipino as well (only the most romantic and hottest!) Marry her if u feel its right

Answer 9

there are many cases that one change religion for the sake of love...others just maintain the same as long as they know how to compromise each other... understanding and respect each others belief is also important specially you plan to get married...

Answer 10

Three months is hardly enough time to "know" the other person. Love is not lust. Love is actually knowing someone. Love is shared dreams, common values, and mutual respect. You must love and respect each other as you truly are and not expect to change them. Not saying it wont work, just that it will be VERY difficult and hard work.
For you or her to change your religion would only lead to greater problems later. I have known several cross cultural and cross faith marriages . I have never known one to succeed. Even when one person subjugates themself to the other, eventually when troubles and pressure build, the relationship disintegrates.
Relationships and marriages are difficult and trying to build one by compromising your beliefs is even more difficult.