First, he works over the road and isnt in till all most ever other weekend. I dont have any problems with that.
I have trust issues that im working on and he knows that, a few days ago his EX'wife came over to spend thanksgiving with her 2 boys that they had together.
Now i have a question for the women, would you get really pissed off if your husband played a song that had to do with sex while he's talking to his ex'wife and say a comment like this 'This reminds me of the good old days' and then they laugh. because thats what mine did, it made me so pissed off i was really sick. We took her home that thanksgiving night, but the next day he gets a call from one of his friends that i know and after he lookes at me as he turnes back to the road, he calls me by his ex'wifes name. I didnt say anything, normaly i would ***** at him for calling me that. But i didnt.
i would really like some help i have no clue as to what to do anymore.
2007-11-27 00:35:16 · 9 answers · asked by nickie20 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I dont think they had sex, he's not the cheating kind, at least i hope he's not, he says he's not.
i dont have a problem with her comeing over to see her boys.
2007-11-27 00:45:35 · update #1
well if i talk to him about it, he would say im overreactiong.
thats what he says everytime i try to talk to him about something
2007-11-27 00:48:37 · update #2
umm when he says listen to this and then plays that song it was or is deliberate
2007-11-27 00:58:32 · update #3
Katharine,
I have trust issues, me asking him questions and talking to him about stuff that makes me mad, all was makes us fight. Im not afraid of him, I just dont know how to talk to him without us fighting.
2007-11-27 04:43:38 · update #4
even though it was probably not intended to hurt you, they should have had the respect not to make jokes of their old times in front of you or act chummy chummy. Thats not fair to do. They both sound childish.
2007-11-27 00:43:04 · answer #1 · answered by Brittney 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone is different...
I am like you, I would have no problem having her as a guest at my house.
I'm not sure that the song and conversation was deliberate... perhaps you are stretching it a bit there.
You are being very gracious with their relationship and the care of the kids. There is nothing wrong with telling your husband that you would like him to raise the bar on his personal boundaries with his ex wife.
I think if you raise hell, he will say you are over-reacting, but perhaps if you sit down calmly and tell him you felt uncomfortable and ask him to create a little more distance between himself and the ex....you may be able to work through this to your satisfaction.
2007-11-27 00:55:42 · answer #2 · answered by Bentley 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats what happens when you don't set limits. TO allow his ex over to your house for thanksgiving - well, in my book - that is getting just a little to cozy. you should have set limits and not allowed that. there is no reason she can't take the kids for thanksgiving to her house - or have it a different day. If that is what you are allowing - it was just waiting to happen. 1. you can either dump him . 2. set limits. 3. be 2nd best the rest of your life.
i'd pick set limits. you act afraid of him, are you?
2007-11-27 01:42:22 · answer #3 · answered by ★★★ Katharine ♥♥♥♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh boy... although it was a nice gesture to have her spend time w/ the boys, yes, he crossed a line!!! sigh... =(... me, personally, don't agree w/ songs playing about sex when the kids are around anyway... so that's 2 strikes... 3 strikes, and he's out... next time she's over, say, Christmas? change the channel or song that's playing... I'd say if they "think about the past" one more time... let her have him... he's not fighting to keep your romance alive, so why fight for him??? ... good luck... but I'd give up after awhile and tell him to go back to her and I'd move on...
2007-11-27 00:41:59 · answer #4 · answered by elvlayarvvi fEisty wife and mom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok the song thing was going to far , it did disrepect you , its not like it just came on the radio ... he needs to know that he is crossing the line , you let his ex come into your home to see their kids ... so with kids involved she will be in your life forever because after kids there are grandkids.. tell him how it made you feel and if he says you are over reacting ... tell him you dont think so ...stand up for yourself ...
2007-11-27 01:06:55 · answer #5 · answered by autumn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To me what he did was wrong, it's the past and should stay in the past, I'd be very mad too, tell him how you feel about this and tell him if it happens again, well you make that judgment call. best to you.
2007-11-27 00:46:01 · answer #6 · answered by kim t 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't think he and his ex had sex? Your biggest problem is allowing his ex in the house. Let her see her boys at her house, minus the ex hubby.
Personally I would never marry a man who had children with another woman.
2007-11-27 00:39:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋
something is going on girl, you better get to the bottom of it too. i wouldnt tolerate that crap. he either needs to get it r ight or get left.
2007-11-27 00:39:43 · answer #8 · answered by jstagirl1969 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wrong.
2007-11-27 00:41:49 · answer #9 · answered by Ali C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋