Help me with my conclusion, this is just a rough draft of what i have so far..?

Question

It is about two womens from two stories...finally achieving freedom from the expectation of society and their husband...


Almost everybody cares about what others think of them at one time or another. Many people are not true to themselves just to fit into society. When it gets overwhelming and starts dramatically affecting a person life, what people think would not matter anymore. In Nora case, she didn’t care anymore about what her husband or any other people would think of her leaving. The only thing that matter to her the most was her freedom.
Mrs. Mallard played the role of an ideal wife to Mr. Mallard for long enough, her death freed her from Mr. Mallard and society’s expectations. Bring her the feelings of freedom, something she never felt while married to Mr. Mallard

Answer 1

At one point or another in life, everybody cares about what others think of them and those expectations can be overwhelming to them just as they were to Nora and Mrs. Mallard. The pressure of external expectations can force people to forego being true to themselves just to fit into society. When it gets too overwhelming and starts dramatically affecting a person's life, it can cause them reach a breaking point where what others think does not matter anymore. In Nora's case, she didn’t care anymore about what her husband or anyone else would think of her leaving. The only thing that mattered to her was her freedom. Additionally, Mrs. Mallard had played the role of an ideal wife to Mr. Mallard for long enough, and her death freed her from both Mr. Mallard's and society’s expectations. It was only through the end of her own life that she experienced feelings of freedom, something she never felt while married to Mr. Mallard

Note: I made some additions to tie your ideas together a bit more - that you can use or rework yourself. Nice work overall.

Answer 2

Dont listen to the first girl above because even though she is correct, grammar is not nearly as important as content is in the rough draft process, oh and the funny thing is, is that she spelled grammar wrong lol well never mind lets get back to the topic... first of all i would like to say that i like what ure saying becuase it has true meaning and i realy can connect with what is being conveyed as for the conclusion part what you can do is leave the readers with insightful advice, in this case the two women were lucky becuase something drastic happened to their benrfit which cased them to achiecve there freedom, they were lucky, but what about those people who never achive such luck and live the rest of their lives without freedom, i think u should really appeal to those people and maybe advise them to take a stand and fight for there freedom becuase we all want it, its just a matter of are we willing to fight for it... something like that, i hope that helped.. good luck

Answer 3

Think it should be his death not her death.
Otherwise grammar and spelling check is about all needed.
Your conclusions drawn straight forward and easy to understand what you were trying to convey.
Only one or two places in first conclusion need to be changed just a little to make them a little clearer

Answer 4

what is the text??

* in Nora's case (correction)

You could start - In conclusion, this text illustrates.......

you really should conclude by saying what the themes of this book are, and point out the timing of the text. i will give you a link for some help

Answer 5

grammer check....

Answer 6

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