I am married for 7 Years (10 years of relationship). We went to India for 4 months to Visit his Parents 1st time. I went to live at my relatives because I was very uncomfortable with his family (they always mibehaved with me but I still spent 2 weeks there somehow)...Suddenly our life went haywire. I found out from my Cousins roommate that my husband has been seeing my cousin at her place& spent nights there and that they even went out to hill station for a week. She gave me thier boarding pass as a proof. I only took my cousin along with me once to introduce my husband. And I never knew when they exchanged thier phone no. I had stayed with my cousin for a week and she took me to all the Pubs where we drank and smoked bcos I dont get to do all this with my husband so I wanted to enjoy the week. I told her its secret between us. She told him everything to get closer to him. I am very heart broken and we are playing blame games. He says i hide things from me,I say u slept with my cousin.
2007-11-26 17:15:48 · 10 answers · asked by Lilsasha 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I dont know what to do. Thier is no lookback for reconsidering the relationship as I told him I cant live with his parents. He decided to leave me. After returning back to NY, he rented new place and called his mom from India. I am still staying at our apartment. I am surrounded with all the memories. I keep crying evey moment. I miss his presence here. I am not used to live without him. I dont know how I will spend my life. Its the 4th day since I came back from India.
2007-11-26 17:20:57 · update #1
We got no Kids because of PCOS and hormonal disbalance but now I am perfectly alright to have Kids. We spent thousands of dollars for treatment. He always used to taunt me that so much money has been wasted on me. So no kid is also may be one of the reason for him to leave me so easily. My family is in NY and supporting me in this difficult time.
2007-11-26 17:42:21 · update #2
My question is = Is my drinking and smoking and enjoying for a week so bad news for my husband to sleep with my cousin to compensate it?
2007-11-26 18:03:04 · update #3
Give it some time. There are too many complications to be ironed out right now.
The only assurance I can give you is that this will end. Tomorrow will be another day and may be there might be a miracle.
Have faith, two months from now you might be looking at this day and wondering why you cried so much.
Do things you like. I am sure you like to do something. If you have friends, talk to them, call them over.
Time heals all wounds. Pray and things will be alright.
Hope this helps.
2007-11-26 17:27:28 · answer #1 · answered by babasbhakta 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
For me, the wedding is over whilst 2 folks (or one part of the couple) not love or admire the opposite. There are a few couples that also reside below the identical roof, or have 'stayed in combination for the youngsters', however their marriage -- the llife-lengthy loving partnership -- has been lengthy useless. Even although you should still techically be married for authorized and tax functions, for all useful functions it has ended. One accomplice relocating out is simply an outward signal of an inward fact, and the divorce going by way of is the authorized expression of the identical factor. The finish of a wedding relatively will depend on the couple; for a few, a wedding would possibly not finish till good after a accomplice movements out. For others, it will finish at the same time residing below the identical roof. This is an emotional milestone, now not one that may be marked via a bodily occasion.
2016-09-05 15:17:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As soon as he turned his eyes from you to her, it's OVER.
He is just trying to get you to take part of the blame for his wrong doing. Are you going to to it? As soon as you do, he's got you where he can use you like a door mat any old time he wants to! Don't do it girl friend! It's OVER, the time for trying to put new life into this marriage is long gone! HE BROKE THE VOWS! The contract is broken! Pick up your things and get, and don't look back! I hope that you don't have kids with him, that would make it a lot worse, but it wouldn't change them. Remember what he chose to do is not a reflection on you, it's a reflection on him. That's the kind of guy he is. If it wasn't gonna be with your cousin, it would have been with someone else! It says more about them than you! I recommend going to a councilor to go through the grieving process and all of the other emotions that you'll be going through. I feel for you, I understand what it feels like to be betrayed. Now is the time to surround yourself with people who are healthy and will support you in the following year.
I just want you to know that I'm praying for you.
Count yourself lucky that you didn't have kids with him. You wouldn't want to have kids with someone who taunts you. You are worth way more than that!!! (that sounds like an abuser to me) Also maybe you can look at it that he had to pay for getting you all well, but the price of his adultery (SIN) is that he doesn't get the blessings.
The anawer to your last question is, "NO!". Can you see how you are starting to take on his guilt?
You want ideas on what to do now? What do you like to do?Go to school, pick up a new hobbie, get a pet, redecorate your apt., do something you've always wanted to do, but never had the time. You are creating a new life now. The possiblities are endless!
2007-11-26 17:54:21 · answer #3 · answered by faithfulox 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is bad boy! what you do is normal. I can't beleive how sick your cousin is to do that to her own blood!
India is such a Holy land, why the Indian people becoming so wicked? I don't mean you but your boy and cousin.
I am glad you found this out now because imagine having kids with such a man? Horrible. Boys like this don't change, he's a cheater!
You must accept you're burning old karma! Pray, do your kriya or mantra, tantra, and yantras for Grace and Realization.
And do the best you can in taking care of yourself. You're lucky to have your family there! Let this one go, you will find a true man, but Pray to Divine Mother, Lalita and Hare Krishna!
2007-11-26 18:47:42 · answer #4 · answered by Lil Blousou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read the Divorce Busters book - it tells how to handle a cheater, cheating and the other woman.
Also look at marriage restoration websites like stopdivorce.org, faithandmarriage.com, biblicalresearchreports.com, restoredmarriages.org
Joy to you!
2007-11-26 17:33:29 · answer #5 · answered by frillyfroofroo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was married 19 years . he cheated on me with my sister . i still kept my marriage going ...for the kids sake... i did love him too . wished i had been smart enough to be rid of him then . after her , he put me @ risk for stds . he was cheating on me more then i want to know , 2 serious affairs after my sister .Thank goodness all test came back negative , Girl, your mind says get rid of him ...do it .. my ex cheated on me 3 years into marriage with my sister . I still tried to save it for 16 more years . I was so unhappy .. Im happy now ..divorced now lil over 5 yrs
2007-11-26 17:25:06 · answer #6 · answered by Will You Take The Red Pill ? 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Adultery is the one reason God's gives for divorce.
2007-11-26 17:51:40 · answer #7 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you go back to India (you said you have family there) and make a life there and you won't have to be near him. He said, she said, you don't sound like you love each other, it sounds like all you need is a blanket.
2007-11-26 17:30:59 · answer #8 · answered by beamer 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
any kids?? if not beat her ***!!! and than get with one of his cousins.. and if so, than put up a fight and show your cousin than you have a life with him and her HOE *** isnt getting him that easy
2007-11-26 17:29:20 · answer #9 · answered by girl19 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your marriage sounds screwed from the get go.
2007-11-26 17:19:17 · answer #10 · answered by looking41thing2nite 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋