Overcoming adversity: What's the hardest thing you've ever worked toward overcoming?

Question

And how did you do it?

Was it worth all the effort?

Advice to others who might be facing similar difficulties?

(Examples: it could be the loss of a loved one, depression, a physical disability, an addiction, financial difficulty, divorce....anything that was blocking your positive progress or potential. What did you face, and how did you overcome or survive it? And do you have advice for others who may be struggling with the similar issues?)

Probably the hardest thing I've ever done was to get myself out of a 15-year long abusive relationship. It was really hard because I loved the person I was with, and I wanted to believe that things would get better (even though they were getting worse.) I struggled with many problems- lack of self-esteem, depression, drugs/alcohol, etc. I credit my friends and family for being there to support me through this time when I was vulnerable and weak. I also sought support from family counseling services. And though it took a few years to regain my self-esteem, and overcome my depression, and rid myself of addiction, it was definitely worth it. I'm a new person now...I feel like I have a new lease on life- and I'm making the most of it. What I would advise to people dealing with a similar situation is this: allow others to help you. You don't have to go through it alone.

And no matter how hard things might be, or how hopeless you feel, DON'T GIVE UP!

Kicks: you're an inspiration. Thank you for sharing that.

Answer 1

My biggest adversity was being into the wrong family . what i mean is that all my life no one has wanted to take responsablity for me. by no one caring i've faced all types of things raped by my father , pimped out by my uncle and all this was before i was 15 . but me being the person that i am i pushed myself into my books then i got knocked down agian my junior year of high school i was expelled from school because i stood up to my bully . only then did i excel. i went and took the ged test and past it on the first try and i only went to the ged classes 3 days now im a full time college student. i have a 4.0 gpa and i work full time and on the side im a motvational speaker.i've been across the fifty state talkin about me and what i've over came. if i had not come from the backgorund that i came from i would not carry myself the way i do. i am something that came from nothing. so was it worth it yes yes yes. i do more in one day than my friends do in a month . by no means am i tryin to sound boastful it's just i can't be quit when God has worked such a beautful way in my life

Answer 2

Divorce is tough, even when it isn't abusive. I worked through one of those, and I too was in love. You just go on and try to forget it.
Obesity is tough, I have worked on it all my life and still have not overcome it. I think I am giving up and then start all over again.
Taking care of my invalid mother for 9 years was really hard and I just lived one day at a time because I never knew what was waiting for me when I went over to her house every time, 3 times a day. Now it seems like it was all a dream.
Though those 9 years of my life seem lost, I could have been working and saving money for when I grow old, but no. So now I have to figure out how to overcome what problems ly ahead.

Answer 3

The hardest thing for anyone is to expose who they are and what has happend. So I applaud everyone who responded to this question. Not only is it painful to think about what has been the most challenging thing in our lives but to reveal what has turned us inside out has a tendency to also make us feel vunerable all over again.
My adversity was having faith. Faith is the very basis of all that you can build your life, your dreams, your future, and your hope upon. If you do not have faith, you live in a state of limbo. I did for many years, just waiting again to feel the reminiscent feeling of believing in life again. The faith that I could wake up tomorrow and feel loved or safe. The faith to believe that when my 34th birthday rolled around I would have faith to believe in life, in the future again. My faith was robbed from me after an ordeal that I endured stemming from attending a church from the age of 21 to 23. During that time I was systematically broke down and conditioned to respond. Most people would term it as being brainwashed. I don't bash God or christians. Eveyrthing and everyone has it's order and purpose. Some people just abuse the power they are given. And I was too niave to realize that not all people are good people. And not all good peple have the right intentions. Overcoming my faithlessness took 7 years. And still from time to time, something triggers a response in me that brings up my old wound. There is no magic formula for creating faith, or happiness, or security. There are no magic words to take away the sting of something someone has said or done. However, the abiIity to overcome simply put, is facing what has robbed you of your joy, your faith, or your safety and understanding that you are bigger than the thing that took a piece of you momentarily.
To have faith in living is necessary to living to one's full potential. To fight for that was worth it. You can't say goodbye to a hurt, there will always be a trace amount that lingers. But it makes you more aware, more sincere, more empathetic and authentic in life.
We may never feel 100% recovered. It's not misleading to feel mostly okay but a part of you is still holding onto that old hurt. It's human. But what you have faced and overcome validates your worth. Each day it might helpt to reflect on a similar motto for years I would say to myself, "I am thankful for the life I've been given. And I want my life to be meaningful to those who matter to me. So I will live as though it matters, because in living like it matters, my life will have amounted to something pretty extrodinary."

Answer 4

I am a rape survivor. That was the hardest thing to overcome for me. I was raised in a very conservative family, so at 20 I was pretty sheltered and naive. I met a very handsome and experienced young man (he was 10 years older than me) and married him. He was my very first lover and a rapist. In million years I could never suspected that about him: he acted like a refined and very gentle man outside of the bedroom. By a morning after my wedding I was reduced to a true victim. He was much larger than me, so I had no control over the situation. I also had no idea what to expect from intimate relations. No one ever explained to me what the norm is. That is why I think that sheltering your children is dangerous. I will try to be honest with my own daughter, so she will never have to go through something like that.
At the end of my 10 day marriage I had lost half of my body weight (which was very little to begin with), sleep, appetite and pretty much my entire personality was completely lost. The only thing that saved my sanity was my desire for self preservation: I ran off. It took years to finally divorce him. I also had to work hard to get my self respect, trust in myself and other people and some kind of peace of mind back. My family and friends played a huge role in my recovery, I also had to get a medical help for all the emotional trauma ( pain, anger, hate, blame and forgiveness ( I am still working on that one, BTW ) ) and finally a wonderful relationship with the love of my life. One thing I can tell you: whatever does not kill us makes us stronger. I refused to play a victim. I went out and gotten my education, built a great career and married a wonderful man. I have it all, because I did not let this thing beat me down. I also dedicated years to research of this crime against women. I know now that rapists are mentally damaged individuals, which means it was never my fault. My advice would be to learn to accept help from the people who love you. Seek medical help as well, because these people know exactly how to help you best. Also learn everything you possibly can about the reasons why things like that happen, and don't let yourself take the blame. See all your troubles as life lessons, learn from your experiences. Also allow yourself to be happy. Good luck and God bless!

Answer 5

The hardest thing I ever had to over come is being sick. I got sick when i was 13 and tell told me that I would not make it to 15 but I did then they said I wouldn't make it till 18 but I bet it. It was hard for me cause I wanted to do sports but I never could because I was so sick. I wanted to give up so many times but I never did because I knew that I could do something important with my life. I know that I will be sick for the rest of my life but it never stopped me. I now have a husband and a wonderful son. I am also starting my own business so its great for me. The best thing I can tell someone is never give up cause once you give up there is nothing left. Just remember all the great things and think of what you can do to help yourself and other just like you. Do everything you want to do and don't stop there.

Answer 6

I overcame on making better music.I did by practicing my singing and playing riffs and structuring my lyrics when I have the strength to.Yes,it was really worth the time to improve myself and having somebody there for you helps too.Because I'm trying to group up members to get my solo done since awhile doing this project.My advice is to really cooperate with people and listen if they are constructing you and if not then just put 2 brains together and work it well.

Answer 7

There have been many, but the one I can't get over is being divorced. It's not because I love him or am bitter about the wasted years, but because I am now spiritually and emotionally dead. It changed me completely. So I haven't overcome it and have no idea how to do so.

Thanks for sharing your experience, and to all the other posters for the same. Some amazing stories.

Answer 8

I got married late in life, and had to learn to live with someone, negotiate, compromise and share. I did, and do, it because I'm in love and want to keep him happy. After several years, I still struggle a bit (especially with the step-mom thing), but it's worth it.

Answer 9

I used to be a very shy, unassertive child. I eventually overcame it in middle school, after a two-year period of being the most sarcastic person you'd ever meet. I toned it down a little in high school.

Answer 10

The hardest thing that I ever over came was the fact that my own mom and one of my sisters were bad mouthing me; soon it got to the point that no one would ever believe me no matter what I said. I over came it by sticking to my guns with patience and perseverance.
I lost my family because of it, perhaps that was meant to be; we can choose our friends, but not our families. Yes, it was worth the effort cause I regained my name and who I am. My advice is to stick with who you truly are; no matter what others may say and never compromise to please the masses.