Can't figure out why a couple married for over 30 years with 3 children would divorce? Kids now adults and no longer at home. Thought true love lasts forever! Why now?
2007-11-26 13:09:29 · 20 answers · asked by FLT 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Marriage at any age, is a tough proposition. No one should get married unless they are willing to give, not a 100% but 150%. That is because there are times when you have to carry your spouse. Marriage is a life time of compromises. IT IS NOT FOR THE SELFISH. Hard times helps you to mature. People that have been married for over 30 yrs should think hard about separating. They'll have a hard time finding anyone as good as the spouse they're dumping. Which means they will get envolved in a worse situation or, worse yet ,find themselves alone in old age.
2007-11-26 13:57:52 · answer #1 · answered by Bernie R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some of them would have divorced a long time ago but they grew up in that generation where divorce is such a stigma. Life changes too - what was once tolerable with a household full of kids and a full time job to go to each day can become unbearable once the kids leave the nest and retirement years set in. Some couples probably say "hey, I only got a few good years left, why not enjoy them".
PS - I know more older couples that are blissfully happy together, that still look at each lovingly and care for each other's needs than couples that don't get along.
2007-11-26 13:22:53 · answer #2 · answered by Signilda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because a lot of people were raised to tolerate bad marriages for "the children." With the kids out the house and on their own, why spend the rest of your life being miserable? If you've given up the best years of your life being unhappily married, you're not going to spend what's left the same way.
Perhaps they found out it wasn't true love after all but felt compelled (pressured?) to tough it out.
My husband and his ex should have never gotten married, and definitely shouldn't have stayed together and put their kids through their marriage. The kids never saw their parents affectionate or loving toward one another; because of that example, they have poor relationships and don't seem to get why. How sad...
2007-11-26 13:58:13 · answer #3 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Makes no sence--but the fact is that some people grow apart. You have a choice to grow together or apart...obviously this couple gre apart. My Parents got married in 72' and are still happy as ever...I guess for some it's forever...for others it's for now. Sad. I plan on growing old grey and dying married to my Fiance. Relationships take work and you have to put forth the effort daily to make eachother happy.
2007-11-26 23:58:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They may have stayed together for the children.
They may have realized after the children were grown they had nothing in common
They may have realized they didn't love each other.
Being married a long time has no guarantees.....in some cases it just means after 30 years you looked around and found out there's really nothing to keep you together anymore.
2007-11-26 13:38:42 · answer #5 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know first hand a couple that has been married for almost 20 years and the husband said he's just counting down until his son graduates so that he can leave.
It's sad, but I believe a lot of couples do this.
2007-11-26 13:27:58 · answer #6 · answered by SexyChocolate 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
love is very fragile, and it doesn't take much to destroy it. people change what they want in life, mid life crisis happen, there are too many people out there who are willing to cheat with a married person. sometimes when the kids leave home, its all that held it together in the first place. could be they really never loved their mate in the first place.
2007-11-26 13:35:28 · answer #7 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nah i disagree with the first person...
what i believe has been happening now is that many older persons wanted to wait until their kids wer older to end the family because they believed that the kids would then be old enough to understand....this removes all the "it's my fault" felt by many kids whose parents divorced early....
the parents felt that it was to the kids benefot to keep the family even if they knew it wasnt working....
i am living that right now...my parents have been together and married for 36 years and my mom recently said to us that she wanted a divorce....she said the only reason she stayed was to make sure we were all taken care of and that we were raised in a FAMILY atmosphere...
2007-11-26 13:16:08 · answer #8 · answered by ebony_316 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
This is a great question. Truly, I think it is because these poor people have to live in an awful situation for the kids sake (or house, or money, or whatever) until one day they go, "Crap! I am not getting any younger and my spouse is still a beeatch/jerk!" And they realize that is never going to change, so they finally break away from their 30 year hell they have been going through in hopes to have some fun with someone nicer.
2007-11-26 13:13:34 · answer #9 · answered by irish_jimmy 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
They probably just stayed together for the children! My parents were married for 26 years when they divorced..i was 16..it sucked
2007-11-26 13:13:26 · answer #10 · answered by ? 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋