I had two really close people in my life about 3 yrs ago they were both my bestfriends and bestfriends with each other and I dated them both (not at the same time) we were like 3 peas in a pod we went to a small school (my class was 12) we had a blast growing up but....I went off to college and I met my future husband and he is the most amazing man I could ever ask for but I can t help but think about my two old friends or exs from 3 yrs ago I keep thinking about them and my husband soesnt like them much only because I dated them and thats it were all friends on myspace but I never talk to them and I dont know what to do why I keep thinking about them at all? we live in LA and they live in Oregon I feel like I want to have a freidnship with them like I need one with them but I cant....does this make sence am I crazy?
2007-11-26 12:19:43 · 8 answers · asked by SiLeNcEd for the unborn 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think we always have a place in our hearts for those first loves and look back on them fondly with nostalgia....with maybe a little fantasy thrown in. As we age we will never again recapture those care-free "anything goes" feelings that we had when we were young and vulnerable. It was easy to fall in love or care deeply because we didn't know we had to be careful and guard against being hurt. I think you are just feeling a little homesickness not only for the place but for that time in your life. It makes perfect sense, all my life I have carried around the memories of a guy I cared about when I was young....he pops up in my thoughts all the time when I am just having a good daydream. Nothing will ever be quite the same.
2007-11-26 12:33:58 · answer #1 · answered by ScSpec 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It makes sense for the most part but you have to realize that your husband doesn't feel that sense of lost like you do. Yea you 3 were great friends and if you would have just stayed friends than your husband would not have a problem with it, but you crossed that line and he does have that right not to want you to hang out with a couple of other people that you felt feelings for other than friendship for.
Switch the roles if you husbands old really good friends came along and he wanted a friendship with them and you knew at one time they had some thing more at one time how would you feel? Would you open your arms up for them to walk in to your marriage? I doubt It.
2007-11-26 20:31:04 · answer #2 · answered by CrazyH 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think for a moment about how you would feel if your hubby wanted to rekindle an old friendship with two females he befriended and dated.....sorta feels different now, huh? I can see both sides actually. I do have to wonder why you NEED a friendship after some years have passed......
2007-11-26 20:40:14 · answer #3 · answered by that judi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your not crazy and its ok to have a friendship with these men but you need to make sure no lines are crossed. as in..tell your husband when you talk to these guys, dont talk to them about any problems or personal things about your marriage. if you only miss their friendship thats ok...but if your thinking about them in a romantic or "what if" way then put the brakes on this thing.
also, sometimes we just have to acknowledge that certain people were an important part of our past but it is time to move on.
2007-11-26 20:27:09 · answer #4 · answered by Heather 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are not crazy, and it is actually a natural phenomenon for women to think back to previous times, and old friends, especially past loves. Leave the past alone, except as a day dream. Live the life you have now, and ENJOY!
2007-11-26 20:28:12 · answer #5 · answered by M S 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are married now. If you were to drum up a relationship with these two guys you would be emotionally cheating on your husband. Don't go there. Be content with your man. Ultimate contentment is found with God tho.
2007-11-26 20:59:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you still think off your old boyfriends because your current husband does not complete your needs... Really think about it! I know you are not satisfied with your current boyfriend. Thus, you want the past, because they were much much better in whatever they have done for you...
2007-11-26 20:26:23 · answer #7 · answered by tou2yaj 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Admit it, you are having naughty thoughts about your old boyfriends?
2007-11-26 20:24:28 · answer #8 · answered by jeff b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋