my boy friend who is called dazza on here has said that he has had sex with me when i have been in a deep?

Question

sleep,some of yous out there has said that is rape ,what i want to know if it is rape ,we have been with each other for 14 yrs so how can it be rape,

well if i am in a deep sleep then i have not said yes to it but i have said no it as well cos how can i answer somthing if i am sleeping, but if iam his girl friend then bf and gf have sex , i am not dumb i just dont know what to do about it

well if i am in a deep sleep then i have not said yes to it but i have said no it as well cos how can i answer somthing if i am sleeping, but if iam his girl friend then bf and gf have sex , i am not dumb i just dont know what to do about it

the bit i forgot to put in was when i am sleeping i have not said yes but i have not said no as well

i take sleeping pills to get to sleep that is way i dont wake up when he is haveing sex with me,but you are right about one thing i dont care about my self ,if had to rate my self on the one to ten i would say i was a one

Answer 1

its up 2 you hun

Answer 2

Hi dazzagirl. It makes no difference if you were able to say yes or no, it would still be classified as rape. It would run on the lines of using dating pills used to perform illegal sexual acts on girls without their consent. It is not that fact that you were asleep that matters, its the fact that you were unable to say yes or no. Time you have spent together is of no importance or the fact that you "normally" have sex, a married man of 30 years can be charged with rape if his wife does not consent to the act. Where you take it from here is up to you, but the bottom line is you were raped. Good luck..... David

Answer 3

Look out your window, notice that most of the color from the world has disappeared. We are turning into a black and white society and not far wway from our existence just being a black and white silent movie where nothing is acceptable anymore.

Free speech is gone as we once knew it.

Unfortuately there are so many sick people out there now which means there are more victims which means we are all a little more taciturn or outspoken about things that did not bother us before.

Angry people will continue to tell you to leave him, report him, take the kids and run, call the police, etc.

Try this instead - either tell him you liked that and it was erotic and exciting to know that he makes love to you when you are sleeping OR tell him you are not comfortable with that and please do not do it again.

By the way how can anyone sleep through that?

Answer 4

Not sure that it can be defined as rape as there is no evidence to support the claim. You only have his word to say that it did actually did take place and all he has to do is deny saying it. The time that you have been together has nothing to do with rape,it's more to do with whether you consented to sex or not. In future get him to ask first to save any confusion.

Answer 5

Well if you're asleep how can you consent especially if you're in a deep sleep - before you went to bed did you say "honey - if I'm asleep, or in a deep sleep it's ok I give my consent to sex" you're out cold (in a deep sleep) which means you're not capable of giving your consent.

Edit: So we all agree on the fact that you haven't said yes, ok but since you're asleep you don't really have the opportunity to say no to it, how does he know you wouldn't have said no? And how do you know it hasn't happened on nights after you said no?

This is basically why Lorena Bobbit castrated John Wayne Bobbit she said he was raping her while she was asleep and fed up with it.

Answer 6

Its rape whether you have been together for 14 years or not if you didn't consent or he forced you against your will. It is unlikely that anyone would be in that deep a sleep that they didn't feel someone making love to them. If you think he did it and you are not happy with it then you have problems, if you are ok with it and believe him then its no problem.

Answer 7

When ever sex is performed both people have to be in agreement,or it is not consensual sex, it is rape. If you have been with him that long, you would think he would want to have you awake to share the experience, or he is only in it for his own self gratification and could care less what you want. But then if you have been together for 14 years and he hasn't committed to you yet, I doubt he does care.

Answer 8

If you were in a deep sleep and you didn't consent to it...it's rape. If you have told him ahead of time "Hey honey, if I'm in a deep sleep and you want to have sex then go for it" then it's not rape.

Answer 9

It doesn't matter if you are awake or asleep if he had sex with you without asking then yes it is rape. He has defiantly raped you, it doesn't matter how long you have been together. Technically rape is when someone has sex without the permission of the other one.

Answer 10

It is rape when he doesn't have your permission - at that particular time - to have sex. If you are not aware, how can he be sure that he has your permission and consent? He doesn't, and that is rape. Same as if a stranger slipped you a date rape drug and had sex. By knowing that you are unable to give consent, or to say no, it is taking away your right to choose, and that is rape.

Answer 11

You can knock off the nonsense; you would not sleep through sex unless you were heavily drugged or profoundly drunk. Either instance is classed as sexual assault. The law in all fifty states is clear: you must be consciously aware enough to make a rational choice as to whether or not to let a guy f(u)ck you.