long story short. the kid is now 14 and just a few months ago we got a phone call from the mother saying my husband of 7 years might be the father. i guess she has spent 14 years trying to find the father and has done DNA testing on dozen of men. well my husband is the father and now she wants the judge to make us pay thousands a month in 'back' child support ! we didn't even know ! nor did she ! is there any way we can get out of paying 'back' child suppor. i know for a fact that the mother will not use this money to put the kid threw college. its in FL.
2007-11-26 05:01:54 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
and she is married and has 3 other kids!
2007-11-26 05:02:57 · update #1
my husband does not want any thing to do with the kid or the mother.
2007-11-26 05:05:31 · update #2
its not that he doesn't want 'any thing' to do with the child its just hard to get in the kids life and i don't think the child is going to be very open when he has had a 'dad' since birth. her husband and her got married when the kid was a few months old.
2007-11-26 05:17:54 · update #3
THAT SUCKS!!!
I take it he already had a DNA test.. As far as back child support..I would NOT just go by what the child support office tells me..Not in THIS case..I would hire an attorney. I think it would be well worth it. Itsn't there a certain amount of years you can go back as far as child support goes? thats something an attorney can look into..
As far as everybody going off on your husband..for not wanting anything to do with his child..HELLO PEOPLE..the boy is 14 yrs old now --- he has a so called father - If the boy wants something to do with him... well- i'm sure the 'father' wouldn't say no.. My guess is... he's not going to try to move forward and get to know the child(i'm sorry- but, I don't really blame him - yes, he is his child--but, he knows the child as much as the child knows him).
I would get an attorney...and of course the mother isn't going to use the money for college... she had how many DNA tests done.
What sucks about this...is he never knew..maybe if he would have known 14 yrs ago that he was a father..a relationship could have grown..but, because of her....there is nothing - so, do I think he should have to pay the back child support..absolutely not!!!!! If they make him pay - Girls out there-- that get pregnant and don't want the guy in your life...wait until the child is 17 ..and then go for child support
2007-11-26 07:02:50 · answer #1 · answered by ★★★ Katharine ♥♥♥♥ 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Where we live you can only get child support starting from when you filed for it.
I know, when money is involved, it is difficult to be objective, but, for your sake, and especially the child's sake, try to look at this from a different perspective.
This child has not known his 'real' father in 14 years. If what you say about the dozens of men is true, then he, through no fault of his own, has probably led a rather unstable existance. You, and your husband may be the best things that ever happens to this child, and he or she might surprise you by being a wonderful (if unexpected) addition to your family.
If you and your husband would like to set up a trust for the child's college, I am sure he/she will be grateful. That does not lesson the obligation he has to help to support the person he helped bring into this world, however.
Try to see things from another point of view.
2007-11-26 05:13:46 · answer #2 · answered by Red Velvette KY 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Call a decent attorney and get legal council or at the very least some good advice.. I would assume that since neither party "knew" who the father is/was that getting back child support would be next to impossible ! However, since this child is yours it would make sense to maybe as an "act in good faith for you child" to start visitation and open up a trust/savings account for them.. That the mother could NOT have access to.... Good luck
2007-11-26 05:07:21 · answer #3 · answered by pebblespro 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he has a legal obligation to pay child support at the time an order is signed and approved by the judge. you cannot collect on back child support if there is no order. why women think this is possible i have no idea. it's like me taking child support from a man that i was married to for 20 years for the child support while we were married. you can't do it. it doesn't start until you take the father to court.
2007-11-26 05:11:21 · answer #4 · answered by Isabella S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get some legal advice, call a lawyer, many questions can be answered over the phone without charge. The amount of child support will go off of the household income.
Good Luck!
2007-11-26 05:08:04 · answer #5 · answered by steyr 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You'll need a family lawyer for this. Sorry it will be hard. But if your husband wants to help his child - maybe set up an account or trust for the child and only the child can access it when the child becomes 18.
2007-11-26 05:07:02 · answer #6 · answered by Equinox 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your husband doesn't want anything to do with his own child? I'm sorry, but that's pretty bad. Its still HIS child.. even if he didn't know until now. Did anyone ever even think about the effect any of this has on the child who's just been thrown into the situation??
2007-11-26 05:09:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
None of that matters. What does matter is that your husband is his father. If he's required to pay back child support, he might request that the money be put into a trust for his son's college expenses.
2007-11-26 05:07:31 · answer #8 · answered by N L 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
i do no longer think of a guy in this earth who's against abortion could be for an decide out regulation. i assume a number of them relatively do purely care approximately themselves. i think of one in all those ingredient might make human beings pay by using fact they have morals. i assume the full u . s . a . is going in that swing. i'm against abortion (till its rape or severe medical reasons) and decide out. making a regulation like which would be against maximum of of the ladies people who morally could no longer stay with the determination of having an abortion. Many fems have faith interior the nicely suited yet say they does no longer have one themselves. quicker or later adult adult males gets this outstanding and that's likely one in all the various reason that i'm no longer a feminist. i do no longer think they are staring on the full photograph while it comprises women human beings and adult adult males in this concern. Feminist decide to push their weight around in this and its going to effect each and every woman, no longer purely the feminists. Oh oops and NO it does no longer decrease the fee of fathers greater. it would in all threat advance it. Many unmarried mothers comprehend the fee of a father. Many babies do as nicely. See what number woman will comprehend after a regulation like that got here into play.
2016-10-18 04:21:35 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, but if he is the father, he might have to pay all that back child support.
Just curious...why would you want to be with a man who wants "nothing to do with the kid"? That sounds awful!
2007-11-26 05:08:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋