when I met him I was 16 he was 23 yearsold, it has since then been 7 years and it seems that every year we grow farther apart, he does not hug or hold me? he never makes advances, when ever I try to look nice for him he doesnt even acknowledge my exsistence? I know I am beautiful, and im not trying to sound full of myself or anything I just want to know why he doesnt want to hold me or be intimate with me?
2007-11-26 04:28:57 · 23 answers · asked by bobby 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The problem is you are too old now. Pedophiles like this always go for the underage girls.
Good luck.
2007-11-26 04:33:02 · answer #1 · answered by box of rain 7 · 7⤊ 7⤋
Whenever a man ignores being affectionate with his woman it is an indication he has deep rooted anger and resentment. It is really difficult for a woman to see how she created her guy to be so angry because all she ever wanted was for him to be happy and just love her. Woman usually go about getting love and attention by their guy by complaining and criticising and crying along with nagging. After a while a a man feels he is unable to please his girl no matter how he has tried, he begins to shut down, pull back on his affections and simply ignore her. He does so out of feeling "what is the use, I can never make her happy anyway, she is always disatisfied with me anyway". So he pulls back and shuts his emotions down. You need to build that intimacy that was lost in the relationship by starting to show him affection. Do this without expecting nothing back and without involving sex. Gently touch his arm, massage him, cook his favorite meals, tell him how grateful you are for all the hard work he does and how much you appreciate him, and then just leave him alone. Remember, expect no reaction from him at all at this time. . This takes time, but soon enough it will work. to bring him around. He needs to open his heart back up to you, for him to do this you must tear down the anger and resentment he feels. Think about all the things you said and did when courting him and do them. I sure hope all works out for you and him, if it does not then it may just be the relationship ran its course and burned out. The fact that he is still there at least indicates there is still a chance to save it. Best of luck to you!
2007-11-26 12:57:53 · answer #2 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Because the luster has finally wore off. When you get a new car or something like that you really take good care of it and try to keep it as new as possible. Eventually you get a ding in the door or something like that and the next thing you know you let it go. You have to find a way to liven things up. What does he like? Get out of your normal routine. Explore fantasies with him and do things differently. You initiate the intimacy. Wear lingerie. Do stuff to surprise him and keep it new. Good luck.
2007-11-26 12:34:53 · answer #3 · answered by No one 4 · 3⤊ 2⤋
The problem is that he thinks that since you two are together that the romance does not need to be there. Try to set up a date night with one another and let him know how you feel and show him the love that you feel ,if then it does not work out then try marraige therepy.
2007-11-26 12:38:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Perhaps you need to TALK to him. Or maybe reach out and show him that you care for him and want him. How often do you tell him how good looking he is? Or that you appreciate him?
External beauty is much less important than inner beauty, without goodness and grace one can quickly become ugly in their partner's eyes.
2007-11-26 12:41:10 · answer #5 · answered by Rebecca W 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Want YOURSELF.
Who the heck is this person. Come on Girl. A man is not the end all to be all. He obviously does not want the same things you want and need in a relationship.
I don't understand why we as women always beat ourselves up like this. YOU cannot make someone want you!!!!
Get a hobby. Find some friends. Talk to your parents but stop this abuse to yourself and your ego.
You are still a young woman who in 10 years won't even remember this bozo. Let it go, move on.
2007-11-26 12:35:33 · answer #6 · answered by Indypendence 3 · 2⤊ 4⤋
I agree w/ Stephen H response....I was going to advise a few books from Lora Corn...you can order online or get them at Barnes and Noble.
Anyway she has these books that have "his" and "her" packets. Each one has scenerios you would do for each other. They are a lot of fun.
2007-11-26 12:45:38 · answer #7 · answered by sierra_91_2000 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Found your problem: "I try to look nice for him" You're trying, that's a good thing. But it's not working. You need to figure out what works. You must seduce him. Don't just try things that you want him to like. Try things that he can't help but like.
2007-11-26 13:02:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask him. If you can't speak intimately to your partner, then what kind of relationship do you have. Don't throw a guilt trip on him or acccuse him of anything, just turn off the T.V. and talk to him about the things you used to do together and that you want to work together to get that back.
2007-11-26 12:34:59 · answer #9 · answered by MJ 6 · 2⤊ 3⤋
You did not say if you are married or not...If you aremarried find a counselor..If you are not married..talk to him and tell him what you wrote here..Then let him know you want a relationship with someone..NOT be held hostage in a COLD relationship that he clearly no longer has any interest in participating in..
Good luck...
2007-11-26 12:37:18 · answer #10 · answered by Dog Rescuer 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Have you talked to him about, that usually helps if he doesn't want to talk, Try spicing things up with you sex lives different positions toys things of that nature. If he still doesn't bite just come straight out and ask him if he still loves you cause if he let the fire go out and hes not letting you restart it. You may just need to move on, maybe he'll come to his senses then. Don't wait for him to long because you may be missing out on someone out there that will love you, and you just let them get away waiting on someone who once loved you.
2007-11-26 12:36:49 · answer #11 · answered by j_thang_2001 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋