for christmas my son has only said 2 things that he really wants. i told my mother in law that i am going to buy these things because we are the parents and we want the special gifts from us. she went out and bought both gifts then gave them to him already. am i wrong to be really mad at her for this? she only did this because i told her i am going to buy them. for the first time my husband agrees with me that his mother crossed the line.
2007-11-26 04:22:38 · 29 answers · asked by WAG 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Let him deal with his mother...she was in the wrong and she needs to be told that.
You should be pissed at her!
2007-11-26 04:26:04 · answer #1 · answered by John 5 · 4⤊ 2⤋
Your not wrong to be mad at your mother-in-law.
What you should have done in the first place was to compromise w/ her on the 2 gifts...you & hubby buy 1 and let her by the other. That way you both win.
I wasn't there...but...maybe you presented it to her in a way that was hurtful to her feelings so that is why she lashed out and bought both gifts.
Anyway maybe next year (christmas or birthday) let her know 1 thing that he wants or don't tell her at all.
2007-11-26 12:34:24 · answer #2 · answered by sierra_91_2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She did cross the line and that is not right but you to are not wise for instance why did you tell your mother in law this they always want to be teh special ones and this not good and second do not share things with your mother in law because they will turn it aganist you so I think that that is your fault for telling know you can ask you son again if there is anything that he really wants for christmad besides those two things he has asked for. that have already been given to him. maybe there is something else that is specail that you can give your son. Also maybe your mother in law thought that you might have wanted her to get it for him you know she could have read in to it wrong maybe give her the benifit of the dought but not to much.
2007-11-26 13:37:38 · answer #3 · answered by Lost 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
LOL next he wants a JAG or Corvette. As a parent and grandparent I see both sides. especially if he;s the only grand child. and yes she kinda stepped in it. but your husband needs to be the one to say something, not you. Next year don't tell her Sh!t. or give her a bogus idea. As long as he knows everyone loves him, isn't that the main thing? Have him pick out some of his used toys and let him donate them. We sometimes get caught up in the buying and forget about the giving.
hope this helps
2007-11-26 12:40:34 · answer #4 · answered by walker9842 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are we related? I have a mother-in-law just like that. I stopped telling her the things my kids really want and instead tell her things that are expensive and out there because I know she has 11 grandkids to buy for. She only does it for one of my four sons. Ironically, the one who won't even speak to her. The other three kids of mine she just goes crazy with the Dollar Store pencils.
2007-11-26 12:38:52 · answer #5 · answered by MJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How did she even know your son's request in the first instance? Do you talk too much? Just take it easy with her. You should even be happy that you have a mother-in-law that buy things for the grandkids. A lot of them are out their without doing nothing, so relax.
2007-11-26 12:37:59 · answer #6 · answered by Pretty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well thats what grandmas do, everything that mommy wont do. so i'd be mad if he got them so early but she was probably just being a grandma and maybe even caught them on sale, dont be mad. she's doing it out of love for your son, not to try to piss u off. a gift is a gift its not more special cuz he got the gifts from u.
2007-11-26 12:45:44 · answer #7 · answered by iluvmeeee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your MIL sounds like a very insecure person, believing she must compete with you to win your son's attention and affection. Anger is justified, but in a big way, it's just sad, and more than a bit manipulative. But as others have said, keep his gift list private in the future, so Grannie can't undercut Mom and Dad, and if you feel the need to address it with her, have your husband do it.
2007-11-26 12:35:22 · answer #8 · answered by GEEGEE 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She did cross the line but remember that these are only gifts and it is the holiday season, which is time for giving.
Rather then getting upset, let it go... it's not worth ruining your holiday cheer for.
Yes, she did cross the line and she might have been rude about it but don't let it get to you. Show her that it doesn't bother you so that she doesn't get the satisfaction of upsetting you.
2007-11-26 12:36:30 · answer #9 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes she is trying to control her grandson and manipulate him. Talk to your husband about this and if possible .. avoid seeing the grandmom except for maybe one time per month..make sur ethe TWO of you sit down with her and discuss this problem SHE is having .... Your husband MUST be the main talker. MUST. The two of you MUST agree on how to handle this BEFORE you sit down with Gramma so that the "discussion" ( which is really your son telling his mother she may NEVER NEVER again do this to YOU ) goes the exactly way it should.. which is that the two of you are the grandchilds parents....and she is finished being a parent. Her job as "mom" is done and now she can sit back and relax.. the two of you can handle it.
2007-11-26 12:35:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would not invite her over for Christmas. Grand parents should never undermine the wishes of parents.
Next time, let her come up with her own gift ideas.
2007-11-26 13:46:57 · answer #11 · answered by oldtomato 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋