Hey, I was wondering why my friends who are all my age tend to treat me like a younger sibling, or a child. By this I mean that they scold me and expect me not to participate in activities that they do when I'm not with them (drinking, smoking) even though I am 22. I was wondering if anyone possibly knows a reason for this? I get yelled at for going out and having a few shots of tequila by a friend who is hold ing his 3rd beer at 9pm and lecturing me in the evils of intoxication. And I am yelled at for smoking and almost forced to stop by another friend who has almost a pack a week. Is there any way to get them to see me as older? As far as I can tell this is not something on their part either, as they treat their friends a equals, but everyone seems to treat me like this.
2007-11-25 17:01:49 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Also, I rarely get drunk completely, only buzzed. So, it's not due to me being an alcoholic, I'm not.
2007-11-25 17:24:55 · update #1
u like crazy???????????
2007-11-25 17:04:26 · answer #1 · answered by Suresh K 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen... you need to get a little something down. There are FRIENDS and there are ACQUAINTANCES... even within family groups.
Acquaintances only call you when they want something... bring a present to a birthday party, or come when they call. These people are "users" at best. They typically don't care about you or anything going on in your life. You always wonder where you stand with these people until you put 2 + 2 together.
Friends are different. They are there for you, usually share common interests, offer a shoulder to cry on, cheer you on, and want the best for you.
At some point, you need to evaluate each relationship and ask, "What does this person bring to the table?" Is this person a mooch? A user? A manipulator? A drama-queen? A time-waster? Or is this person your cheering section? Provide insight? Make you laugh?
As you go down the list of traits and how each thing makes you feel, you will know who you should be spending more time with.
2007-11-25 17:59:24 · answer #2 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I could be totally off, but maybe they tell you not to do these things because they see more potential for you. They feel like their lives have spiraled down the crap hole and want to keep you from making the same mistakes. It may seem "do as I say and not as I do" but they mean well. And maybe you should stay away from tequila shots and cigarettes. They're not exactly the healthiest ways to hang out and pass the time with friends.
And besides, getting trashed isn't really adult-like. It's not really attractive either.
2007-11-25 17:07:14 · answer #3 · answered by Just Me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not entirely sure why they would do that unless they think that you are completely irresponsible, which you probably are not. How old are your friends? I know how you feel in a situation like that, I'm 17 and hang out with 19-23 year olds and the majority of them treat me like a little sister, which is kind of nice, until they start lecturing. And then you think to yourself, "What right do they have to lecture me?" It's just the way it turns out sometimes. Your friends may want to feel more mature or older than you mentally, so they treat you like they need to teach you everything in life. They may just want to teach you from their mistakes. Who knows, maybe you should pull one of your friends aside one day and ask them why they are sort of 'prying' into your personal decisions. Whatever happens, I hope you find out and I hope they start treating you better and no be judgemental of your decisions in life.
2007-11-25 17:09:18 · answer #4 · answered by Matt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think they are your friends. Maybe your an Alcoholic . You probably act really bad when your drunk and don't remember so they are trying to protect you from getting into too much trouble.
And just face it smoking isn't good for anyone.
So quit whining like a child.
2007-11-25 17:10:41 · answer #5 · answered by K 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe it's cause they care alot... you should let them know how you feel about this , because they wont stop until you tell them to. and maybe you seem younger than them or maybe you are the least experienced of the crew and that might be why they worry so much... it just might be them worrying and not treating you like a child.. but i more than sure that if you ask and tell them about how you feel you are sure to get the answer you are looking for... much luv 2 step!
2007-11-25 17:08:54 · answer #6 · answered by 2 step! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you seem like a "better" person.
Iike they don't think you would, or should be, doing those types of things.
maybe they are the wrong crowd for you! don't try anything"badass" so they will "respect" you more, because they probably won't. you need to find some kids that actually treat you as an equal!
2007-11-25 17:06:26 · answer #7 · answered by Abby 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You probably get too drunk and act like a fool. If you are always playing pranks, and acting childish, they may get embarrased in public with you. When you don't act your age, people tend to treat you like you are younger.
2007-11-25 17:06:53 · answer #8 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you're going through life playing with a deck short of 52 cards and they feel a need to protect you.
2007-11-25 17:05:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe your better than that and they know it. Maybe you cant handle it and they know it. Maybe they like you and don't want to see you take the wrong path that they did because they care for you. Im not sure trying to figure out the same one myself
2007-11-25 17:05:15 · answer #10 · answered by Kj 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They are jealous you are having fun with friends that arent mutual to them. They dont want you to have other friends. So they say dont drink wothout them. Either that, or you act like a kid, and they dont think you can make your own choices.
2007-11-25 17:05:20 · answer #11 · answered by SR 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋