What is good about being married?
And what is bad?
Do u regret getting married and if you do why?
I will be getting married soon and i would like to know...
I am 21 years old she is 19 are we too young....Should we wait...
2007-11-25 15:28:26 · 24 answers · asked by SMILEY 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If EITHER of you have doubts....W-A-I-T!
Couple of things to think about....contrary to popular belief....having sex before your married can complicate things. So, I would eliminate that part of your relationship so that you both can see clearly and are not ruled by hormones!
Give yourselves time to REALLY get to know each other. Learn about what makes each other passionate. Where do you want to be in 5, 10, 35 years? Can you see being with each other that long? WHY do you love this person? WHY does she love you? How do you feel about each other's families? What do you know about them...REALLY know about them? What were THEIR marriages like? Do you have good examples of marriage around you? Get to know those people? What is their secret? What do you want out of life? What does she want out of life? Are you heading in the same direction? Are you willing to change direction if life dictates that? How will you deal with that? How do you deal with health issues? Money issues? Time issues? How do you spend your leisure time? How do you feel about having kids? How do you feel about not having kids? What if you have kids and they have health/mental problems? What if you lose your job? What if she can't work? What if....what if....what if.....See...when you take sex out of it, and quit worrying so much about getting married, you'll see that there is a LOT to discover about one another before you take the next step. And it's a LOT of fun finding out about the person you are REALLY in love with. :0) I've been married almost 22 years! It's not been easy...but it's not been hard. And I wouldn't change a thing...and oh, we dated for 3 years and did not sleep together before we got married. Had a rockin' honeymoon!
2007-11-25 15:47:27 · answer #1 · answered by Pondering Pam 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No one can answer this question but you. If your asking then you must have doubts and THAT ALONE SHOULD BE YOUR ANSWER. I am married for 12 yrs. I love my husband but I can also hate him at times. If you marry, you must be willing to both compromise when the bad times come. No marriage can ever be perfect. If its right, you will both know. I wish you the best of luck in what ever you choose. Understand that you are both young and there are many changes in life that you will still experience with your maturity whether you want to or not. My husband & I are stilling learning new things about each other today.
2007-11-26 00:42:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
19 & 21 may or may not be too young, it depends a lot on how you were raised. My 20 year old niece got married in June. She is the 4th in a family of 14 children and had a lot of responsibility and I know will have a successful marriage.
It would be wise to meet with a clergy person or family counselor to help you determine if you are really ready for this commitment.
2007-11-25 23:38:06 · answer #3 · answered by knittinmama 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I got married a few months ago and we are 20 and 21 and i don't think it is too young but you really need to know what your doing, you can't go into it lightly and you need to be sure you can provide for each other. I definitely don't regret it and even though we fight like crazy about stupid things we know that our love for each other is stronger than anything. i think the hardest part is just realizing that you have a house to clean and bills to pay and that its real life. I'm loving every minute of it! good luck!
2007-11-26 00:08:33 · answer #4 · answered by Shelby L 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you already know whether you are ready or not by reading your question. There is doubt there, and marriage should be without doubt. Maybe instead of asking questions, answering would help your decision making...
Why the concern for what is good and bad?
Why are you marrying so young?
Is waiting on option for you?
What would happen if you did not get married?
Maybe some pre-marital counseling would help you. There are compatibility quizes and discussions about important issues now and in the future. Small concept for such a life-long committment.
Good Luck
2007-11-25 23:42:44 · answer #5 · answered by ama 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The GOOD: The ability to have your own son or daughter and watch them grow up...this will change your life.
The BAD: After a couple of years, your sex life gets really boring....just the thought of having sex with just one woman for the rest of your life can be devastating to some guys.
The UGLY: When you get the point of not even getting erect for your wife, and all of a sudden, she labels you as being impotent or the old "you don't love me anymore" treatment.
Don't make this mistake yet, you are way too young for marriage. Marriage is a life long committment and at your age, divorce is just around the corner.
Goodluck with whatever road you decide to take:)
2007-11-25 23:59:39 · answer #6 · answered by Joe Tea 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't really think of pros and cons when it comes to being married but rather just being ~with~ my husband.
Marriage is more of a committment to the relationship but it hasn't changed anything for us.
We still love and respect each other, and learn more everyday but that is not due to the marriage itself.
I suppose the "bad" thing about being married is how much it cost for the wedding, and how much it would cost to get a divorce..if something should happen down the road.
As far as waiting goes..think of the goals you have in mind..can you achieve those while being married to this girl?
2007-11-25 23:42:26 · answer #7 · answered by Kelly C 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just remember that marriage is for grown and mature people. I'm not talking about in age alone. There will be times when the two of you love each other to pieces. Then there will be times when you want to rip each other to pieces. The thing is staying committed to making your vows last and staying in love. Stay focused on why you got married in the first place.
2007-11-25 23:53:22 · answer #8 · answered by ds 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to first understand what marriage is- its not the romance story, fire works every day. Its a commitment to build a life together. If you two are in college, Id honestly suggest waiting till you BOTH graduate before getting married. A little marital conseling would be a great idea.
2007-11-25 23:39:03 · answer #9 · answered by kttphoenix 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yes your to young.. you have not even experienced life yet alone and then you going to add another person in it. there is so much people can do before marriage you cant do after marriage. marriage is hard work everyday. we been together 23 yrs and we still have to work at it.. not as hard now as it was when i was younger. when your young you have so much crap you go though just to get to 23 yrs later. its not easy as one might think.. you need to talk about things before marriage also.. like money, bills, home, kids, goals, jobs, religion, you want to make sure you both are on the same page with each other in what you want for each other in life.. if you can work all that out before hand and feel you know what you both want then you can decide if marriage is right at this time.. good luck
2007-11-25 23:36:46 · answer #10 · answered by Kat 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋