My friends husband wanted sex one night and she was not feeling like it. He started yelling at her then grabbed her and pinned her to the ground crying. She kept asking him to let her go. Finally he did.
My friend says this was a one time thing and it wont happen again.
Is there really a one time thing when your talking about abuse?
2007-11-25 15:22:46 · 13 answers · asked by mike s 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
NO! This is how he deals with anger and frustration, by physically lashing out --- it is hard wired. By definition he is not under control so he can't control it. The underlying issues need to be resolved and he needs to learn new ways of dealing with these emotions.
There are lots of things in a marriage that can cause frustration it is only a matter of time till it happens again and likely escalates.
2007-11-25 15:28:50 · answer #1 · answered by George 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If it was a one time thing then it sounds like they will live happily ever after.
If it happens again it is not a one time thing and she needs to get the hell out.
Everyone deserves a 2nd chance but maybe not a 3rd.
Grabbed her and pinned her to the ground crying is not good. He controlled himself and did not go beyond that by forcing sex or striking her. I don't know, I have raised my fist in anger but never swung it. I have pinned someone down and created fear but never did it again.
Are alcohol or drugs involved? If so, they gotta go or it WILL happen again.
Sometimes you gotta go with your gut. We are all talking about our own reactions and do not know this woman or man you are talking about.
2007-11-25 16:05:48 · answer #2 · answered by EddieH 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Having been in an abusive relationship, I don't believe it is a one time thing. That what he did, is just a baby step. It usually gets worse. Warn your friend about the cycle of violence and be there for her when she needs you.
2007-11-25 15:27:56 · answer #3 · answered by lwomar 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They always say it is a one time thing, and apolgize etc...it never is. He is an abuser and all it takes is one time to prove it. She should insist he get counseling and if he refuses she should leave. This type of abuse is often the precursor to serious injury or even death.
Remember "what you accept you teach".
2007-11-25 15:27:42 · answer #4 · answered by ScSpec 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe so. Either it is ingrained in a person that this behaviour is acceptable or it isn't. This was over SEX. She was not screaming at him or berating him.
It is POSSIBLE to lose control once, see the error of your ways, and change, but it's not what usually plays out.
2007-11-25 15:27:10 · answer #5 · answered by gingerdaisy43 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i doubt it will be a one time thing.. if shes real lucky it might be. but more then likely if he gets that mad for that reason it could get worse. he wouldnt get sex again for a long time for doing that. and he might even find himself tied up when asleep and beat with a iron skillet.. i would tell her if shes going to stay with him that if it happened again to get out.. and dont look back.. that will be the true man he is when he does it again and you cant change someone only they can change themself. good luck
2007-11-25 15:29:29 · answer #6 · answered by Kat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is not okay.
Marilyn Monroe was smacked once by Joe Demaggio and she didn't take his crap either. She left his butt and he regretted it the rest of his life.
People don't do that chit.
You get your friend and support her and help her get out, a man DOES NOT force sex onto a woman.
2007-11-25 15:29:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
not only is it not ok...but HELL NO it's not ok. it's time for your friend to either get her husband to counseling or seek a good divorce lawyer. and if it happened again, i'd be calling the police.
good luck to your friend
2007-11-25 15:38:33 · answer #8 · answered by psuns 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No way..... if he did it once he's capable of doing it again and it could get worse (more violent). Obviously, he has no respect for her. I would be really concerned about my friend.
2007-11-25 15:30:28 · answer #9 · answered by Dawn C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its sad that there's man out there that are violent and women dont do anything about it....My sister has violent bf and she is still with him...What's up with you women...stand up for yourself and dump the man a s s
2007-11-25 15:32:24 · answer #10 · answered by SMILEY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋