They suspect we are have sex, and we are, but doesn't she have doctor/patient confidentiality so that the doctor doesn't necessarily have to tell her mother the truth? She is 16 and I really love her. I just don't want her to get in trouble and I don't know what to do.
2007-11-25 15:12:25 · 18 answers · asked by Regan M 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
In the United States, a girl of any age has the right to confidentiality when it comes to her sexual and reproductive health, so no, a doctor would not be able to rat her out to her parents under any circumstance.
Going to the gyno isn't always about sex - women need regular yearly exams and pap smears to tell if there are abnormal cells in the cervix.
2007-11-25 15:18:37 · answer #1 · answered by Take A Test! 7 · 9⤊ 1⤋
Many states have laws where a minor can see a doctor and even be on birth control without notifying the parents. I don't think that the gynecologist can tell the parents anything if your girlfriend doesn't want them too. Of course it will matter if they are in the room with her, or if the mom is. Your girlfriend doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to. If she is afraid of the exam, I think she can refuse to take her clothes off. It can be a scary thing - the first gynecologist visit. Due to many health reasons though - since your g.f. is sexually active she should be getting regular pap smears and exams, and possibly on birth control depending on her parents and her religious beliefs. I of course believe honesty is the best policy, but I know that some homes just aren't very supportive or understanding - so that is in her hands. Hope this helps.
2007-11-25 15:28:08 · answer #2 · answered by Sweetness 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Likely your girl may fold under the pressure and tell her parents before going to the gyno. Once a woman becomes sexually active, she should make yearly visits to the gyno for her own health. So, going there is a good thing for her.
Unfortunately, the doctor will likely invite her mother back with her at the gyno. They usually do that, and they aren't going to tell the mother that she should wait in the waiting room. Why? Well, it's due to the fact that your girlfriend is a minor, and therefore her parents insurance will be paying for the visit. This is much like going to the doctor's for a cold when you're young. She's going to need her mom to sign off on the visit, so, her mom is 99 percent likely to go back with her.
This means, in blantant terms, you're screwed in keeping it a secret. You really do not want her parents to discover that you two are doing the wild thang from the doctor. Her parents may be totally cool about it, and get her on birth control, more likely though, they will be quite upset.
The solution that I see is that you and your girl need to come clean to her parents. You need to tell her parents that you love their little girl and want what is best for her, always. You need to let them know of the informed and intelligent decisions/precautions you two are taking to not get pregnant. (If you're not taking precautions then you need to ASAP...condoms, birth control pills, the whole nine yards) You also gotta convince them that you will stay if their daughter gets pregnant. Maybe going out and buying an engagement ring (since you are adult enough to have sex) will help to illustrate this.
Truly, the last thing that parents want is for their daughter to get pregnant while the father of the unborn child flees the scene. So if you love her, you will either wait to have sex, or take the next step, engagement.
I'm sure you are well aware that sex is designed as a way to reproduce, and protection is not 100 percent. You must be prepared for the possibility that your girl will get pregnant.
You two need to confess to her parents. If they find out from the doctor, they may completely ground her from spending time with you. The truth from you and her will carry more weight than anything. The last thing a parent wants is to be lied to. Now, I know the answer you get when you tell them may not be one you like...they may in fact decide that their daughter is too young to be having sex. But, if you love her, you truly love her, you can accept their feelings and perhaps once you propose to her, they will see things differently. Anyway, I do think it would be worse for you for her parents to find out she's having sex with you from the doctor rather than from the two of you.
Loving her means being respectful to her parents wishes as well, while she is a minor. Once the two of you are married, then no one can tell you what you can't do in the bedroom!
2007-11-25 16:19:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has to consent to her parents being notified. HOWEVER, "mistakes" happen, and if she does not specifically tell the OB that she does not want her parents notified and get confirmation from the OB that they parents wont be notified its pretty much fair game because she is a minor.
I was 16 when I got pregnant, I had gone to the doctor to get a blood test and I was at work when they called with the results. The technician gave my mom the results. (Mind you my sister was in the room so I know my mom didnt claim to be me and she heard my mother tell the tech that "I'm her mother, she isnt home, I can give her the results" and the tech just went ahead and did it.
2007-11-25 15:27:13 · answer #4 · answered by mjoy2685 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are having sex she needs to be on the pill and you need to use condoms. Are you ready to be a father? It is too easy for a girl to forget to take a pill, so wrap it up!
And yes, the doctor cannot legally tell the parents anything, but would you rather them not know and not get her on the pill or have a kid that you can't afford to take care of?
2007-11-25 15:19:16 · answer #5 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No the doctor cannot tell her parents whats going on if he finds anything and she asks him not to tell..BUT if her mom is persistent she could go in the office with her and be in the closed room with her daughter and doctor if she choose because her daughter is still a minor. The doctor cannot tell her she isnt aloud in with her daughter even if they do get in a quarl at the office! so if the parents REALLY want to know they will!
2007-11-25 15:24:02 · answer #6 · answered by Hanna and Ryan's Momma 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Her going to the doc is a good thing. He/She won't tell her parents anything, she can get on bc, and make sure that her body is ok. Its normal and healthy for 16 year old girls to go to the OB/GYN and its important since you're having sex that she goes.
2007-11-25 15:20:38 · answer #7 · answered by happybee 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her parents the truth they might be mad but its better lieing and her parents finding out later but most likey whatever they find the Doctor as a release of info for him to tell her parents anything but she is pertty young so he or might have no choice but to tell them.
2007-11-25 15:29:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
she has to tell the doctor she doesn't want her parents to know, but if her mom is in the room or is paying for it, or wonders why the doctor prescribed her birth control, or wonders why her doctor said her daughter declined to share any information, she's gonnna know, so you both need to be honest, and if you really loved her you probably should wait until you guys are older.
2007-11-25 15:23:07 · answer #9 · answered by marianne o 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nope the doc can't say a word. but the gyno isnt going to be surprised if a 16 y/o comes in having sex. i'm sure she see's patients alot younger.
2007-11-25 15:22:58 · answer #10 · answered by Brittnie 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋