I was with him 3 years,We had agreat thanksgiven and we were making plans for the weekend.we haven't been fighting things were good.I took him to work,he never came home. I get a call from his mom later that night that he had called and he is on a bus headed north...Now I am about to lose the place we were renting and my car and he showed no signs....I'm so scared and hurt..I wasn't working and he knew that I would lose everything if he did this..I need help so my daughter and I aren't homeless by next week and I need to know how someone can love you and do this.
2007-11-25 13:43:29 · 13 answers · asked by Joy B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't have family I can turn to , my mother has cancer and can't deal with the added stress,none of my friends are in a place where they can help me.I had been looking for work before this happen its hard when you have a 8 year old and you have limited hours. There is no after school care in my area and now I don't know what to do..I feel like the walls are caving in on me and no matter what I do its not going to be enough. I am so hurt and in shock..none of our friends can belive this..no signs not even to them. no contact,no goodbyes
2007-11-25 14:02:54 · update #1
Have you ever watched lifetime? I'm sorry to say it that way, but this has happened on some true like stories on lifetime. And it's sad... but the saddest thing of all is a woman who depends solely on a man! That's a mistake. I don't care how much he provides you should always stand on your own two feet. Season change and men do too. He could have been suffering from depression or some sort of mental illness. His mother is sure to know more than she's telling.
But your focus needs to be on you and your daughter. Go get a job now... he wasn't yuor husband so don't expect any help in that area, unless he's the father of your daughter. In that case then go to put him child support. find a church in your area and tell them of your problem. But you have to act now... instead of being on this computer get out and talk to people. Maybe a neighbor can let you stay there for a while or you can move back with a relative. Sometimes God does things to wake us up! consider this your wake up call. Stand woman! Seek God and trust him and go get a job first thing tomorrow morning even if it's at McDonalds. Just go get one... e-mail me if need be!
net30cal@yahoo.com
2007-11-25 13:51:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i did that to my goal too, no children though
I don't know if there is no sign!!! I played sweet for the two weeks before I left. We bickered some before on and off for the 2-1/2 years we were together.
I left because I wanted to make it in music and an old friend watered plants for a big-time country producer and said he could get my demo to him. I was going nowhere and stuck in a crap job living with rents. I never had serious g/f and it was too intense.
I was selfish and ran. I felt bad and things didn't turn out where I went to. My friend ended up trying to sue me to pay most of his mortgage and I couldn't find a job. The producer didn't take me serious.
She contacted me, hid her pain I'm sure. She didn't even ask me back just said she missed me. It was horrible b/c she is suicidal person with several suicides in fam. I was so bad!
I came back 2-1/2 months later, but I got in some music bands and am back to the itch of acting foolish again.
I guess musicians are generally bad hubby material hehe.
Anyways, I worry your guy is having a mid-life crisis and maybe ran off with some net girl.
If it doesn't work out, you may hear from him.
It was realllly crappy what he did. Maybe he got tired of supporting you and the responsibilities. He is no good!!! Bad blood! I wouldn't take him back unless you were total basketcase but then your future is screwed if you don't get it together and leave him for better! USe him, cheat whatever!
The more you chase, the more they run. Call shelters, the YWCA, whatever you temporarily have to do if rents and friends can't help.
2007-11-25 15:22:35 · answer #2 · answered by Jack Bent 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this is hard for you, but there are options.
My friend had 2 kids, age 5 and 3, left her husband and stayed in a shelter for a week until they got into a women's shelter, and then they gave them clothes and a way to look for work and programs to help get on your feet.
Now my friend has an apartment, is going to school, and the government is paying to put her kids in daycare while she goes to school.
You will be okay, just do some planning as best you can, and things will work out. :)
2007-11-25 14:07:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh. i feel so bad...that is so weird...and soo wrong. Do you have some place you and your daughter could stay at? Like family? Friends? Some sort of shelter? And look for a job. Oh wow, i am sooooo sorry that this happened to you. I know it's hard but you have to try your best to stay calm and have control over the situation. Ask friends and family for help. I'm sure they would help you out. I would definitly help you out if i could. i feel so bad. I wish you all the luck possible and god bless you. And i will pray for you.
2007-11-25 13:53:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like this guy had some mental illness issues.
What you need to realize now is that God would not have given you this burden if you could not bear it. For whatever reason, this has been placed on you to go through it. And, by through it, you need to do EXACTLY that- go THROUGH it- do not pass GO, and, in this case, there is no $200.
When something is this bad, I always believe that there is great favor for you where you least expect it. I would suggest reaching out to your formal/informal networks (neighbors, church members, boyfriend's mama, your mama/sister/cousin/brother- whoever!) and report what has been done to you.
And, whatever you do, do not let pride paralyze you into not asking for help.
2007-11-25 13:58:32 · answer #5 · answered by Buggadocious 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here is my story. My husband just left for no reason, everything in my name, house, cars everything!!! He was gone for 5 days and I was going to lose everything. He did come home but it leaves me always asking if he loves me, why if someone loves you do they just leave? We can't answer that only he can. Hopefully he will call and give you some insight to his feelings.. Good luck...
2007-11-25 13:51:19 · answer #6 · answered by boohoo1964 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously he was a master of deceit. I don't know how someone could do that...couldn't face telling you and leaving you holding the bag...guilt or he is just a plain old ordinary sociopath.
2007-11-25 13:50:11 · answer #7 · answered by ScSpec 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He can't love you and do this. If he loved you, he would have told you and you would have had time to plan for yourself and daughter. He's not in love with you and he doesn't love you.
Good luck and you could have been with him even longer and then wasted all that time with him.
2007-11-25 13:49:00 · answer #8 · answered by rabbit4041 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
someone can't truly love you an do this. you were used it sounds like. seek your nearest shelter and don't rely on a man to take care of you and your child. get a job an get on your feet....
2007-11-25 13:48:29 · answer #9 · answered by Gayisha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW, just pick up the pieces and try to move on it'll be hard as hell but u cant loose it now
2007-11-25 13:48:50 · answer #10 · answered by thicknsweet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋