Married last year and I have a 6 year old daughter and a 6 year old step daughter and 17 year old step-son. The X husband is a so so good guy. Very tight with the money! We pay for 90% of the children. Here is the major problem: step-son is smoking pot, lying, and stealing from us. We have caught him and this has been happening for a year now. I finally had enough and made him go live with his father. Now it seems I am the bad guy cause I don't want him around the two 6 year olds. I do not trust him one bit. He lies so much, when his mouth is open, it is lies. The parents have always never made him mind, now I am being the hard person on him, and he has thanked me many times. Now he knows I mean business and my wife feels she has to go see him elsewhere or go to dinner with him if she wants to see him at all. That is not what I want! I just want her to stick by what she says, I have been her backbone since she cannot stick to her word. Am I wrong here, what do I need to do? Help!!
2007-11-25 08:08:24 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You're not wrong for saying that enough is enough in your home, and you're not wrong for protecting the six year old daughters. If you have explained to your wife that you don't mind if he comes over so long as he doesn't live with you anymore, then I am not sure I understand the problem? I do think at the very least he owes the two of you an apology for disrupting things to the point where you had to have him go live somewhere else, and I wouldn't accept him over to the house until he is ready to do so. Something similar happend with my stepson four months ago, and he has yet to step into this house since. My hubby goes out to dinner with him and sees him elsewhere, but I am standing firm in that he owes us both an apology before we all start playing "The Waltons" again.
2007-11-25 08:21:55 · answer #1 · answered by Marina 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not wrong. The child needs some tough love and it is long over due. I would have sent him to the juvenile detention center. He has to learn that there are consequences for his actions. Soon he will be 18 and if he steals from others he will get locked up. You cannot let him be a bad influence on the younger kids. If you would have allowed him to stay and steal from you, the other two are watching and learning.
2007-11-25 08:33:09 · answer #2 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids who's parents never held them accountable grow up to be criminals or just really unhappy. You're doing this kid a favor. The only reason everyone else gets to be the good guy is because you're keeping things together. It's selfish of them and they need to help you uphold rules. Tell the adults to start acting like adults.
2007-11-25 08:23:55 · answer #3 · answered by Narasimha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This might desire to be an fairly stressful concern. i comprehend you like your babies. you may desire to talk w/ him. See what the place he sees himself in those youngster's lives. because of the fact that their organic and organic father is now no longer there for the babies, he(as your husband) might desire to be the father determine. no longer something makes babies happier then having dad and mom that love one yet another. You the two might desire to be in contact. you won't be able to easily think of approximately you and the babies because of the fact which you have a kin. Your husband is a ingredient of that kin. it is in all likelihood why he says he would not experience like your husband. He would not experience related to you. in case you married him, i'm assuming you theory he may be a great "father" on your babies. enable him be the top of the better half and childrens. Get some expert help. stable success!!
2016-11-12 19:20:27 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best thing - sit down and talk to your wife and tell her what you have just written.. WORK on a solution together.
Ps. I think you are absolutely correct - there needs to be reprecussions for negative behaviour - as a parent, it is our goal to help them and teach them what is acceptable - lessons for the rest of their lives.. you are doing that.
2007-11-25 08:19:55 · answer #5 · answered by Laura S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't sweat it, you're not the one with the problem.
2007-11-25 08:30:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋