Together for years..share a MORTGAGE, buy a dog, split all bills 50/50, do their laundry, all house chores......but god forbid it becomes official and get married. Then there's people who have been together 6 mo who get married...or people who have an ovbiously unhealthy relationship get married?? Guess it works for them. But what is the deal with poeple and the fear of COMMITTMENT?!
2007-11-25 00:42:18 · 14 answers · asked by dixie 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
To committ is to stay loyal and true despite all the flaws you discover in your partner. That is the fear that many of us have. And marriage is unity between man and woman till death do them apart (Though some helpless romantics would claim togetherness even after death, which is sweet but rare!). What if you realize something about your spouse that you never knew before and can't wait to leave them? It's the matter of will to have the guts to put an end to violence (if your spouse is violent) and or intolerance over you partner's behavior be it in parenthood or managing your investments and money.
Sometimes it just takes patience and understanding. Unconditional love is only attainable if you are willing to let your partner be who they are... especially if the things that bothered you about are minor issues.
2007-11-25 00:57:12 · answer #1 · answered by Pmel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
marriage is to gain more advantages, and to take more responsibilities.
we would say that strong bonds of love and a closer relationship are the advantages, while the responsibilites are providing financial and emotional security.
Some people take the advantages and refuse the responsibilties. this can be done through a long term relationship.
I am totally against such solutions. Mariage is the only choice. But, to think of my fears of commitments; i can say that the reasons are: first, afraid to be with the wrong person. Second, afraid that our relationship turns into duties, and only duties (where love disappear )
maybe because i did not go far in love, thats why i have such worries. also because i don't have to marry someone just to for the sake of marriage. I am totally against this idea; that would be burning the last card i have to get happiness and freedom, besides it would bring me disadvantages more than advantages.. lol
2007-11-25 01:26:28 · answer #2 · answered by Psychological Moment 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The Greeks knew that the most frightening thing in the world is the unknown. No one really knows what is going to happen in the future. Making a commitment to someone or something is saying "I will stay with you no matter how good or how bad things get" which can be VERY frightening. Commitment flies in the face of the one thing that is always happening: change. If you thought you could get a better mate in three years would you make a commitment for a lifetime? Commitment makes things very complicated very fast - that is why men (AND WOMEN) fear it.
2007-11-25 00:49:15 · answer #3 · answered by Paul Hxyz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
don't want to grow up, don't want the added responsibilities, or feel they have made the commitment to each other by living together and don't need a ceremony and paper to signify there love and commitment to each other, or afraid something will change after a ceremony more expectations from family, friends and each other. commitment is the unknown, more and more of us come from split households and know that marriage is probably not forever, easier to stay single or live together than get married and deal with the consequences when it ends. also worried the other person will want to change you, expect you to be home more often, "check in" as my coworkers have to if they're going to go out after work, not be able to do things you want to do when you want to. also some people get married just because they feel they have to get married, not because they want to marry that person but society family friends expect that next step and don't make good choices. commitment is scary, it's putting alot of trust into another person who may still hurt you or you may hurt them.
2007-11-25 02:30:51 · answer #4 · answered by carrie w 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You said it all and that's the answer. Once we make commitments, we are responsible for 50/50 of the other's obligations. As we look around to those we know there's always a few that cause an emotional hell in the relationship and they look at this and fear that will happen to them.
2007-11-25 00:57:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
usually because of the fact men are comprehend for drowsing around and dishonest so women human beings made up a rationalization why they do it by potential of asserting they are fearful of dedication which I say continues to be a lie, they want and love women human beings. some women human beings are whores and all of us comprehend you cant turn a whore right into a house spouse. the different reason is they are lacking in a area and picture many men will restoration it, they do no longer want or like the only they are with yet is scared to be on my own so as that they seek around, the two way its no longer reliable for every physique to sleep around in a courting.
2016-12-16 18:15:42 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people see marriage as something that can easily be cancelled and do not worry too much about it. Other people regard it as something serious, or maybe they are afraid that it might bring bad luck and if they get married things will go bad.
2007-11-25 01:34:54 · answer #7 · answered by Analyst 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
change of lifestyle?
Everyone has their different for everyone.
Most of the time, if a couple has an unhealthy relationship, it goes deeper than that, as to why they get married. It's usually because of money. (not for everyone though, everyone has their own personal reasons for their choice.
2007-11-25 00:47:42 · answer #8 · answered by Kat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You lose part of yourself with marriage and some may not be comfortable with having the extra responsibility associated with marriage. It's more fun to play house than to actually live it.
2007-11-25 00:52:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
fear keeps people from doing all sorts of things...
I personally believe that we choose what is more important to us...
some people may prefer fear
others prefer the alternative.
2007-11-25 16:31:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋