I (the guy) always wants sex! She (the girl) never wants sex! We have been together for 3 years and married for 1 and now sex is almost non-existent.
Maybe you women know more than I, but when I ask, she gives me the excuse something about "discharge and that she feels uncomfortable and embarrassed" Another thing is she wont have good ole dirty sex. she has to be clean out of the shower, so I cant be fun and spontaneous with her where ever. I tell her to not be embarrassed because I do not mind - does not matter to her. Is this just an excuse? I dont think I can last much longer. I've tried ignoring it, doesn't work. I've tried masturbation, gets old and boring. I've tried to spice it up, null. I dont want divorce, and I dont want to cheat, I heard about swingers? Ha, ya right, dont think that will fly with her.
I dont know, just very sexually frustrated. There are a lot of people I can NOT have sex with, and only one I can have sex with, but I cant.
2007-11-24 16:16:14 · 13 answers · asked by Jaymz F 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well I like to be clean when I have sex, It just me. I think she knows there might be something going on down there and wants you to enjoy your stay (if you know what I mean). Try to be understanding to her. She may have picked up a vibe for you before.
So try this while she is in the bath, go help her wash, and make love to your wife in the bath or shower. Or as she is getting out, meet her to the door. It will make her feel wanted, you get what you want, and she will be shower clean for sex.
Also, do not always have sex first do other things, then later have sex,
2007-11-24 16:27:26 · answer #1 · answered by lynnn30 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Welcome to the club it could be what my wife is going through
she feels we rushed into sex and now she wants to get to know each other without the sex. Trust me very frustrating
that worst part of it is she like teases me and then says she isn't. I have huge sex drive and it idriving me nuts but really
I will just hang on will never cheat but I'm with you on the whole masturbation boredom. Really she may just want more communictaion from you without the mentin of sex try this maybe it will work. Really though man your getting excuses but never tell them that unless you want a screaming match.
Talk to your wife ask her she has changed the over the last while and why she doesn't enjoy sex anymore.
One thought she wants a BABY!
Have you talked about starting a family maybe it is time.
God Bless and Best Wishes.
2007-11-25 02:54:07 · answer #2 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to be in counsleing with a therapist who can deal with this. Or just show her my message, and yours. I can't believe she never wats sex, but she may just want it a lot less than you do. Work on the romance side of this. You should anyway, but this will either help her at best or give here less of an excuse at worst.
As for the clean thing- why don't YOU clean her (most women i know love it when their man wash their hair)
2007-11-25 00:49:12 · answer #3 · answered by kttphoenix 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would sit down with her and have a serious talk. Tell her how you feel. Tell her you think you need couple counseling. And yes, this is grounds for a divorce. Marriage means compromise if you want it to work out. She will have to give in some, and you will have to put on the brakes some. But if you are only married one year, get to counseling NOW, before you end up cheating or living a lifetime in an unhappy marriage.
2007-11-25 00:22:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well first off, cheating would be a BAD idea...spilt before you do that.
Secondly, it *sounds* like the reason why she won't have sex is because she's very self conscious or feels bad about herself (i mean she has to take a shower prior to) you need to let her know she's fine the way she is and beautiful and wonderful and romance her some and you'll get some. If a woman's self esteem and confidence are high, so is her sex drive.
2007-11-25 00:21:42 · answer #5 · answered by Hawai'i 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This has to be mentally and physically difficult for you. Sounds like there may be an underlying problem on her end. I would venture to say counseling on her end would probably be good at this point. Its too difficult if you want it and she isn't willing to accomodate; this is a good reason why guys look elsewhere. Get to the heart of the problem, and whatever you do; hold out. Its in both of yours best interest.
2007-11-25 00:23:54 · answer #6 · answered by Michael 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel, as I am in the same situation and for the same caliber of reason.
I accepted her endless provisos and channels my passions elsewhere (one reason I am here).
These are excuses because she lacks the moral conviction to come right out as say she never wants to have sex with her.
Since you are not that deep into the marriage, I would not chase her down and force her to come to you
2007-11-25 00:24:48 · answer #7 · answered by Experto Credo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I know a couple that has been married for five years. They say that they have sex 1-2 times a year. They're very happy and very much in love. It's entirely possible. Just depends on what your agreement is.
2007-11-25 00:19:33 · answer #8 · answered by Been here before 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
You sound so much like me..I'm at the point of pulling out my hair with frustration!
2007-11-26 01:08:21 · answer #9 · answered by punkroc mama 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The discharge thing has happen and is very very embarassing. Give it time .
Good luck
2007-11-25 00:24:05 · answer #10 · answered by Louise B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋