My ex receives over $1800 per month in child support for my three kids with her.
Since our divorce, she remarried and had a fourth child. At that time both she and her new husband were working. Neither of them was making a lot of money, but there was income. But now both of them are without a job and have been for the past 9 months. Their only income comes from the child support I'm paying for my kids.
Does this count as child abuse and neglect? Since neither of them make any money, how is their child supported?
Thanks.
2007-11-24 07:51:12 · 13 answers · asked by oracledriver 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Since they quit working, they had the electricity turned off at least once, same with the phone.
Each time I pick up the kids, they are either dirty or dressed in dirty clothes.
When I question the ex about the kids, it's always "They have been playing outside" etc. The job - "they are looking".
I don't have the money to drag this through the lawyers and court again. Is there no recourse?
2007-11-24 08:15:26 · update #1
Welcome to the REAL World.
The money you pay is hers to do as she see fits. Unless you can document abuse....
Get on with YOUR Life.
2007-11-24 07:56:12 · answer #1 · answered by Retired and Glad 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if you really truely feel the children are not being cared for, then you need to call social services.
how they are surviving on only $1800 a month for 6 people is beyond me. i can't survive on that as a single person. you can't force them to work. you were court ordered to pay that amount. just because she is married and has another child, doesn't change your support amount.
my ex has a similar thought process. because i am married with an additional baby and one on the way, he shouldn't have to provide for his children except for a sweater once a year and capri-sun case once a month. and me not working really chaps his hide. his excuse is because i am not working, he shouldn't have to pay support either. but yet when he had custody, he thought nothing of collecting child support even though he only dropped the kids off at school at 7am and didn't see them again until 9pm that night because i had them with me everyday, every weekend.
so without being anal...stop whining, you are doing your duty by providing your required amount. you dont' get to lower your child support. if you are woried about the welfare of your children, call social services and make a valid report.
2007-11-24 16:56:54 · answer #2 · answered by Isabella S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Child support is too be used for the kids. My husband requests through his child support case worker that she has to show what the child support goes for. A certain percentage can go to rent, food, and what ever. But he was able to get it so that the rent is divided by however many in the house. So if it was 1200.00 for rent then it is only 200.00 a person and since you have 3 kids the most that could be used for rent is 600.00. So in are case the monthly bills are all split in hos much per person. But just document everything. Save all receipts, so that you can show that the basic child support isn't being used for the kids.
2007-11-24 16:50:04 · answer #3 · answered by Lovemep 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
As far as I know, child support is supposed to go for things directly for the child. Some parents I know who receive child support do use it to pay rent/utilities and I believe that's acceptable. I think that you should definately consult your lawyer as to whether she is taking advantage of the funds allocated for your children. The money should go in no way to support the child she had with her new husband. Perhaps you can investigate if there is a way to set up an account for the money to go to that your attorney or a mutual attorney can monitor to see where exactly the funds are going.
I looked online and found this: that the money can go to things that indirectly benefit the custodial parent and/or others living with them (ex: paying a heat bill). Check out the source list for more info.
Either way, definately get up with an attorney. You don't need your hard earned money to be wasted-it's there for your children, not for her and her new husband. Best of luck to you.
2007-11-24 15:58:55 · answer #4 · answered by Amanda S 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No she can't but, unless there is other money somewhere, she obviously must. Maybe they are getting welfare? If so, and they have not informed the gov't that they are also receiving your $1800, or that the welfare was just for them and 1 child, it could be fraud of the gov't.
Sounds like you may have a chance of gaining full custody. Talk to your lawyer.
Don't fool yourself, it will probably cost you at least $1800 if they were living with you, so unless you are fit and want custody be careful, because you might be placing your children in the custody of the court. Talk to your lawyer.
2007-11-24 17:10:37 · answer #5 · answered by mecasa 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You might want to consult your lawyer and divorce decree. $1800 a month is not a lot of money. Not a lot for 6 people to live off it and still pay the bills.
2007-11-24 15:55:31 · answer #6 · answered by i_b_winkn_at_u 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry, but nothing you can do about it..unless you want to hire a lawyer and fight for custody..
$1800 a month in child support is ALOT of money. (you must make mega bucks!) - BUT, my thoughts are this...if your ex and her husband want to live off of $1800 a month - so be it..thats their life--- your job is to make a better life for yourself..and the children when they are with you. nothing you can do with how she raised the children---but, you can do something when you have the children
(buy them clothes for when they are at your house--keep them at your house etc- then you don't have to have dirty children).
hopefully they will get a job soon-but, honestly- that is none of your business..
just look at it this way....
do you want their lives????
if not...... don't even bother with how they choose to live...
2007-11-26 10:51:16 · answer #7 · answered by ★★★ Katharine ♥♥♥♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it cannot count as abuse or neglect unless they arent using the money for the children. get a lawyer and go to court and have your amount reduced or file for full custody as they cannot support the children. if they are living off your child support on purpose then i believe that can be counted as fraud but most likely not. you are only responsible for your children, not your wife or her husband or their child.
2007-11-24 15:57:00 · answer #8 · answered by DJ M 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No this is not a case of child abuse or neglect.
Unfortunately, she can use the money anyway she sees fit. Not fair but once it leaves your hands there is not much of a way to track how it is used.
2007-11-24 16:13:05 · answer #9 · answered by A M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Between your support and perhaps any other benefits they both may be receiving, perhaps they're able to survive. Did she also get the home free and clear?
Be cautious, she may request an increase! ;(
2007-11-24 16:07:06 · answer #10 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sad to say that its her money now to do whatever she wants with it unless you can prove your children are suffering in some kind of way.
2007-11-24 15:59:42 · answer #11 · answered by Fly Boy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋