im a bit lost at the moment as i dont know what the deal is with my bf, we've been 2gther for about 20months now and ive grown very attached to him as hes everything i want, but we both finished uni exams yesterday and he went off on a boys trip down the coast for a surf this wkend. I find this a great problem as really shouldnt he want to see me first, then go surfing??? his reasoning was its 2 days and then i have him for 3 months and he needs to get out of his room as he was locked in there studying for the past 2 wks non stop. I think that if u truley love some1 u would want to be with them , right???? my mother agrees with me and she put all these ideas into my head now which has got me thinking , is he inlove, he says he loves me but i think theres a difference. Or is there a point u get when your in a relationship that u are comfortable to do as u please?? He has never ditched me for his mates before and he thinks if he wouldve stayed that means our relationship is unhealthy
2007-11-23 14:33:26 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Thanks heaps for the advice guys and girls, yeah i worry a lot im a virgo its in my nature to worry and be very possessive and over analyze every situation. i will try to chillax now!!! :)
2007-11-23 14:48:20 · update #1
you're needy.
this guy has been with you for nearly 2 years. he's keeping you around probably because he loves you.
i dont care ifyou're together for 2 weeks, 2 years, or 20 years. everyone needs interaction with their friends.
i love my boyfriend dearly, but he's away until monday on a hunting trip with his friends. although i will attack him and smother him with kisses when he gets back, im happy tha i have the weekend to hang out with the girls.
stop over analyzing the situation.
have you ever heard the phrase "how can i miss you if you wont go away?"
2007-11-23 14:39:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs a break and will appreciate it if you can let him have it without nagging him or making him suffer because of it. You even said 'He has never ditched me for his mates before'. See it for what it is, some time away with his friends to blow off steam and stress from the past 2 weeks.
As for mom, she may mean well or she may be trying to put a wedge in your relationship for whatever reason. A good mother will listen, offer advice if you ask for it, but normally not say or do anything to encourage trouble in the relationship unless she sees a serious problem and feels it could harm you. I don't think there's anything about a boys surf trip that could lead anyone to think you'd be seriously harmed.
My mom always listens but has never encouraged me to react any particular way. She lets me come to my own conclusions and respects the decisions I've made. If I make the wrong one she supports me while I pick myself back up.
It seems needy to me.
2007-11-23 22:48:39 · answer #2 · answered by MISS H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that he wanted to relax and just enjoy surfing and spending time with his guy friends doesn't mean he likes/loves/wants you any less. It is healthy when people are in romantic relationships to have other friends and mutual friends.
I think the best thing to do is focus on what makes you happy and enjoy the fact you are done with exams and have a break and have fun with your friends. When you speak to your boyfriend, just ask him what you are questioning. You know him best, so you will be able to tell if his feelings are different than they had been.
Good luck.
2007-11-23 22:40:29 · answer #3 · answered by Amy102481 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should let him go. When he gets back just tell him you love him and you're glad he's back. You can't push a guy to spend all his time with you because then you'll end up losing him. He might just need to get away from everything for a few days but when he gets back I'm sure he'll want to hang with you just don't be too clingy.
2007-11-23 22:46:13 · answer #4 · answered by rain_walker7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're needy. let him have his weekend with the guys and you can have him all to yourself afterwards. in a healthy relationship you should never be so totally dependent on someone that you need to be with them every waking moment. while he's gone why don't you have a weekend out with your girlfriends? in every healthy relationship you need some you time away from your partner.
2007-11-23 22:38:00 · answer #5 · answered by smarttkdgirl 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you and your mother are wrong.... he can love you but that doesn't mean that he HAS to be all the time with you... he is a person you know... he has friends... he has hobbies... give him some room to breathe or he'll get tired too soon.
2007-11-23 22:39:27 · answer #6 · answered by BitterSweet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think you are being needy but sometimes when your with someone for a long time you need a lil bit of time appart... i have watched my parents split cuz they never get time appart..... sometimes to make the best things work out there needs to be a lil space... you dont always want to be smotherd..... just give him a lil time to "the boys" lol........ it will be ok.... calm down..... i hope things work out for you.... good luck
2007-11-23 22:39:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are needy, smothering, and a nag.
2007-11-23 22:45:09 · answer #8 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NEEDY
2007-11-23 22:37:47 · answer #9 · answered by That's a good question 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋