I asked a question a couple hours ago about if 5 week olds miss their mommy...Well my husband wants to drop off our little girl at his mothers sunday night and i dont feel comfortable with it yet. I told him that and he told his mother the same thing. Well she just called me, and she must have thought i was going to say yes to her, but i said no, i wasn't comfortable with the baby being gone overnight this soon. Well she kept persisting and telling me "oh stop it, she'll be fine". I kept saying no, and she kept going on. I finally said yes.....but i do not want her to go. I know this might cause an arguement between my husband and i, because i already said yes. Ahhh shes so persisted she doesnt take no for an answer. What should i say to her? she obviously doesnt take me seriously.
2007-11-23 13:05:40 · 15 answers · asked by ♥Kristen♥ 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
persistent* spelling
2007-11-23 13:09:34 · update #1
I totally know where you are coming from. I have four kids, and I am still uneasy about letting a really small one spend the night somewhere else. I think I would let my MIL babysit for a couple of hours so that hubby and I could go grab a bite to eat or spend a couple hours together, and then I would go and pick the baby up and have it spend the night at home with me. I would just explain to my MIL that I didn't feel comfortable leaving the baby overnight somewhere without me just yet.
Your MIL will be able to spend some time with the baby, and you'll be able to sleep better knowing that your baby is at home with you. Just tell her that you appreciate her willingness and desire to watch the baby, but right now your not ready to let the baby sleep over somewhere just yet--but maybe when the baby is a bit bigger you might reconsider. Good luck.
2007-11-23 14:44:07 · answer #1 · answered by yolieszabo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to say that you are not comfortable with the situation and it is just too soon to be away. It might be better if your husband talks to his mom about it instead of you since she seems very persistant and doesn't want to take no for an answer. I would talk it over with your husband and try to explain how you feel. It is very soon after you both had the baby and it is not unusual for you to want to stay with the baby.
That being said you are very lucky that you have your mother in law close by and she wants to help out. In another month or two you will probably love the opportunity to go out for a couple of hours with your husband knowing that you have a trustworthy place to leave your daughter. Getting a little time for yourselves can make your transition to parenthood much easier. Just start slow with a couple of hours here and there so that you can all adjust to it.
2007-11-23 13:19:44 · answer #2 · answered by ebstar80 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tell your mother-inlaw you appreciate the offer nut you are not ready to let your daughter go for sleep overs just yet, when she says she'll be fine say I know you will take great care of her but please remember when you had your children and how you felt when they were young. Also tell her that if she would like to watch her for a few hours so that you and your husband can spend some time alone that would be great, but that you will pick her up in a few hours. You need to also tell your husband that he needs to be more supportive of his wife and not his mother. Remember your daughter is only 5 months and is still bonding with you and you are still adjusting to all that goes with having a new born. Enjoy I have a 21, 18, 14 year old it goes fast, but remember you need to have time alone too try a few hours than try an evening, and work up to a sleep over when your ready
2007-11-23 13:16:14 · answer #3 · answered by kdonsky@rogers.com 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I wasn't away from my kids until my youngest 2 (my older was 4) because I wasn't comfortable, and even then I was away but they were at home with my husband. My husband and I have never both been away from the kids overnight (they are 3 1/2 and 5 1/2). It is all about your comfort level. IF you are nervous about being away from your baby then you are not going to relax and enjoy your night off. It is not up to your MIL to decide, tell her you changed your mind.
2007-11-23 13:15:28 · answer #4 · answered by S B 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
As far as the baby's concerned, one night away from mom that young will not hurt her. My second child went on her first sleepover when she was 2 weeks. As for mom, if you are really not comfortable with it, put your foot down. If your mother-in-law won't take you seriously, giving in and saying yes will only make matters worse. You will end up with a child spoiled by a grandparent instead of one raised by parents. You will always be the bad guy and your child will never listen to or respect you. Tell your husband exactly why you feel the way you do. Hopefully he will understand that his mother comes second to you when it comes to the raising of this child.
2007-11-23 13:19:18 · answer #5 · answered by nyeviolet 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You need to talk this over with your husband and be truthful, that it's not that you have a problem with his mom watching your daughter but the fact for your own peace of mind you're not ready or comfortable with "anyone" watching your baby overnight....and that you do appreciate the offer but the answer right now is no to any overnight stays....
2007-11-23 13:18:20 · answer #6 · answered by vickie b 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My kids are nearly 4 and nearly 2 and I wont leave them overnight yet. She is your baby so stand your ground. Tell your husband if he wants a break then he can go and sleep at his mothers and you will stay at home with your baby. Don't fall to pressure. If your husband gets angry just explain that your not comfortable and leave it at that. They will both get over it.
I probably wont be ready to leave my kids overnight until they start school at least and my husband understands that.
just don't do it if you don't want to.
2007-11-23 13:19:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I wasn't away from my daughter for more than 4 hours until she was 9 months old. At 5 weeks old, I wasn't away from her for more than a couple of hours. I would miss my daughter even if I was out having a date night with my hubby. He would laugh at me. You have every right to do what you need to. You're the mommy. Everyone has to understand!
2007-11-23 13:10:39 · answer #8 · answered by Precious 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I personally wouldn't leave my 5 week old with my mum or my partners mum over night. I wouldn't leave her with them for more than 1 hour at that age. I didn't leave my daughter with my mum overnight until she was about 11 months old. Just tell your husband and his mother that you don't want to do it and that is that. There will be plenty of time for her to have your daughter when she is older. Just be firm. Good luck
2007-11-23 13:22:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that your answer is NO!! If she keeps insisting, then tell her you have made you decision and you have to get off the phone! Sometimes you have to put your foot down and sometimes grandparents need to recognize that you are the parent...not them. I went Thru similar situations. I made it known that I will make all of the decisions and I do not need any input. Now everything is a given and they don't even ask or dispute my decisions.
Good Luck.
2007-11-23 13:11:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋