I got married with this man who loves his family, especially his mother very much since she brought him/his sibling up almost by herself.
We've been married for a year; I came to the U.S. three years ago where is none of my family living. I came from a broken family, and I've been barely talking to my father over 5 years. I've always wanted to be in a marriage where I could feel secure and connected to my spouse, and spend time together a lot.
My husband is very independent person, and do things independently too. For him, being with one person all the time is not natural. He would go to see his family/friends as much as possible for weekends.
Since he is 32 y.o, he has so many important things and responsibility in his life and he cannot put me first or the biggest concern, or make me his most important person in his life.
He is my most important person in my life though I love my friends and family. Is wishing to be the most important person in a spouse's life is insane?
2007-11-23 12:18:08 · 11 answers · asked by rbk 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't think he is cheating on me. I know he loves me and cares about me. There's nothing wrong about him but the fact we are not matching. He wants to do things independently whereas I want to do things together.
He would never be "I wanna take a vacation to spend a whole week with her." He would think to do something like camping with his friends, and would think "she can come with me."
I have never been his center. He wants to love & care many people so that his time will be devided. He would be like "I will spend time with you for Saturday morning, and will go out to see my friends afterwards, and stay at their house, and so on..."
I feel like spending time with me means time for chores like washing dishes and working out.
I don't know if we should stay together, because I am not happy in this marriage life that requires to be independent.
2007-11-23 12:33:55 · update #1
Clearly you are very important to your husband- he married you!
There is a difference between being the most important person in your husband's life and being with him 24-7. There is nothing wrong with having friends and certainly nothing wrong with spending time with family. No one wants to be with someone who needs them every second of every day.
That being said, why can't you go see his family with him sometimes? After all, they are your family now too.
2007-11-23 12:39:14 · answer #1 · answered by looneybin90 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, I'm the same way your husband is. Love my family and friends, spend lots of time with them,and my wife feels the same way you do. However, I might not tell her all the time that I love her or that she is the most important person in my life, but she is. She is my other half, I adore her and love her more than anything in this word. And let me tell you something, if he respects his mother and loves her dearly that's just a proof what a wonderful person he is and that he is caring, respectful and loving . This is a proof that he will always respect and care about you. Believe me, you are the most important person in his life.
2007-11-23 12:48:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU should be the most important person in his life. How and why did you get married? Maybe that needs to be asked of him.
Talk to him.
2007-11-23 12:26:16 · answer #3 · answered by purplewaterhorse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree, you should be the most important person in his life, if you are not now it will get worse in time, tell him how you feel about it, if he does not change then you will have to make up your mind and decide if you want to live like this or not
2007-11-23 12:32:06 · answer #4 · answered by George 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its not insane.. but i believe ur husband do love u and u are one of the most important person in his life too... man are different from women they will not show or tell if u are important to him... but deep inside he cares and will protect u if he see u in trouble.... trust him and he will be the one for u
2007-11-23 12:23:53 · answer #5 · answered by jinnui 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is insane is you cannot see the fact that you are the most important person in your husband's life. If he was the most important person in your life, you would be talking to him about this.
Sad :(
2007-11-23 12:22:37 · answer #6 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
A real MAN puts his wife FIRST.
He sounds as though he's using you....are you SURE he's seeing his "friends and family" on the weekends and not cheating on you? If I were you I'd be following him to FIND OUT.
2007-11-23 12:23:19 · answer #7 · answered by lady_phoenix39 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When he returns home from work set a candle light dinner and wine on the table, enjoy each other, then later ask him about perhaps trying new things often.
2007-11-23 12:33:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I wish for the 4 components of happiness: Freedom, Laughter, Good food, and good (you know)
2016-05-25 03:52:47 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should be the most important person in his life!
2007-11-23 12:22:28 · answer #10 · answered by engineer46526 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋