PLEASE Answer!!!!?

Question

I just posted a very good news on yahoo answers
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AuotiPtc7hd4S1J5vD1W2eLsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20071122164109AA0vjIB
And right now my husband asked me that " If it is Okay that you do paternity test. Will you be offended". He said he always thought about doing that whenever he has child.
we married for 5 months. I was virgin when I met him. I never had any relationship with someone. He wasn't virgin when he met me. I came from a very traditional background and would never even think about someone else. Is that okay for him to ask these kind of questions.

i don't want to do that. Why would I. How could he say that to me. I never cheated on him ever. You tell is that okay for him to ask this?

Answer 1

Firstly, congratulations!

He obviously has a bit of a trust problem and a bit of paranoia as someone has already stated. He's the one with the problem not you, so don't make it your own. You need to sit down and talk to him and find out why he feels the need for a paternity test because i personally don't think that it is something that somebody would think about unless they were in a situation were they would need to think about it. I think there's another reason, and that you need to find out what that reason is.
I'm sure you'll both sort it out, and are very excited about the baby. Good Luck.

Answer 2

I would want to know WHY his is wanting me to take the paternity test !! ?? And .. I would not settle down until he gave me the answer.

I would tell him that ... YES ... I AM OFFENDED !!! Big Time !!!

I would remind him that I was a virgin when I married him .. even though he WAS NOT. I would tell him that I have NEVER had relatations with any other man. I would also ask him WHY he thinks I have ?

"ME" .. personally me .. I would probably tell him that "YES .. I am going to have the paternity test ... but I will never think the same of you again ... for doing this to me ... and I may not even come back to you again". I know this is strong .. and it is your choice .. but this is one of the worst insults of your life that he could give to you .. especially since you were a virgin .. and he probably really knows that you have never had an affair on him. Shame on him, for doing this to you. And .. for doing it to you at such a precious time .. which is your first baby .. with the husband you love.

I think he knows you have never cheated. He is wrong for doing you like this. He needs to make huge ammends to you.

Any person can say, or ask, whatever they want to ... however, I think he is so out-of-line with you ... and he should be so ashamed. He should also be thankful to have a wife who was a virgin when he married her .. and who has never ran around on him .

This is such an awful blow to the heart .. while trying to enjoy the wonderful news of your first baby. I just can't rave enough here .. about how wrong he is.

He should BEG for your forgiveness.

Answer 3

You don't need a paternity test, don't waste your time or money, he knows you have not cheated, he is just overly excited, scared, and nervous all at the same time. You tell him this, if the baby does not look or resemble him at birth and the family is all in doubt, you will get a test done, but he has no right to treat you like you have done something wrong right now, and by the way, Congrats!! babies are a gift from God.

Answer 4

If he knew you were a virgin from a very traditional background, sounds like he does not respect you. I would take the test, show him, although it is up to you what you want to do after that. I would not expect much from after you have your child. Also, there are many situations where women are in danger of their lives during pregnancy. Hopefully I am totally off base, although you need to be aware of these things, be wise, cautious, and not naive. God Bless.

Answer 5

As husband and wife it SHOULD be okay to ask any type of question to our spouse. In a situation like the one your in its probably just an insecurity issue with him. If you take the test and the results come back the way you expect then that will help your husband to get over his issues and to trust you more.

Answer 6

Its really not fair of him to ask you like that..

first ask him why he asked you to do this?
he must be feeling insecure for some reason...

but to save your relationship with him and for the sake of your baby
its better if you take the test.. Show him that your not a cheater...
If you do not take the test your husband will keep having doubts in his mind which could ruin your relationship in future...
Just to clear his doubts and prove yourself to him...I advice you to take the test... and after the tests comes out positive just tell him how you feel about him asking you to do this even after he knows You've been true to him...tell him how much it hurt you.. that'll make him ashamed of himself..
and he'll lern a lesson to trust you more...

Answer 7

Yes of course it would hurt anyones feelings, but if he has doubts why not clear the air with a simple test and when it comes back positive he will feel very bad and realize how stupid getting a test was in the first place...

Answer 8

here's an old saying that will clear this up

a woman always knows who the mother is but the father never knows who the father is.

if he is the father then the paternaty test will put his mind at ease.

doesn't matter really. If you are married when the child is born then he is automatically the father, even if the paternity test says he isn't.

if you have been loyal then humor him.

Answer 9

NO, it's very unusual for a man to ask this from a woman. It sounds like he's not happy with the news at all and is trying to back out of his fatherly responsibilities. I don't think you realize it yet, but your marriage is in serious trouble. This guy doesn't really love you.

Answer 10

tell him that if you were to try to find out before your child is born, that there is a risk you will miscarry and you arent going to take that risk.
if he wants a paternity test done after your angel is born, well, thats up to you.
i would really be offended as well and i wouldnt hesitate to tell him so.
just relax though and dont let him get you worked up and stressed out. its no good for your baby.
just talk to him and find out why he wants one done.
is it because he doubts your faithfulness or is he just curious about having a test like that done??
i really dont know what else to say though but i hope it all works out well for you and i hope your pregnancy goes smoothly.
congrats!!!